Howling Winds
by Tranquil Rain
Summary: After seasons of hardship and mistreatment, a young tom finds himself desperate for answers about his past, about a life he never knew. He will embark on a journey, one where he will discover not only who he is but also where he truly belongs.
1. Prologue

**Hi, everyone, and welcome to my first story on this site. I'm so excited to share this with all of you. Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own the Warriors series. (At least I can believe that I do. :I That has got to count as something, right? ... Right?)**

 **Prologue**

A cold wind swept its way over the hillside as a tom sat looking out over the horizon in silence. _Where is he? He should have been here by now,_ he thought critically. Not a heartbeat later, his companion crested the rise of the hill and sat down beside him impatiently.

"Well, are we going or not," he asked, looking at the white-and-black tom expectantly. He stood up again and began pacing restlessly in a futile attempt to quell his growing excitement.

"We would have been here a while ago, Beetle, but you just _had_ to go explore that rabbit warren..." He chuckled. "Oh well, I might as well show you the territory while we're looking around here." He stood and padded towards the forest, Beetle following at a leisurely pace behind him. When they were close to the trees, Beetle stopped and fluffed out his fur against the biting night air.

"I-Is it always this cold here?" He shuddered, obviously not on good terms with the wind, or the cold. "I don't know how you all can stand so much wind."

"Sometimes it gets to be absolutely freezing at night. Trust me though, you'll get used to the wind after a while," the tom replied brusquely. "Now quiet down; you'll scare off all the prey on the moor." Turning back in direction of the treeline, he scented the air for signs of prey. He stiffened suddenly and proceeded to quickly usher Beetle into a dip in the terrain that was sheltered by a handful of small, scraggly bushes and other plants. _Whatever that scent is, it shouldn't be here. We're too exposed, despite being where we are. We could easily be spotted by a passing cat… or a fox. This isn't looking very good right now,_ he thought insecurely as panic gripped him. His instincts implored that he run, yet his curiosity rooted him to the spot, making his paws feel as heavy as stone/

Cautiously, he peered through the bushes that lined the top of the hollow; their thin branches and the dismal amount of leaves barely camouflaging the white in his pelt. He watched as a she-cat emerged from the trees with a kit dangling from her jaws sleepily. Her ears pricked. The she-cat's gaze flitted to a gorse bush a ways away from her. Setting the kit down in a pile of leaf litter close to the treeline, she crouched and began creeping towards her quarry. "What is she doing," the tom hissed under his breath. _That prey-stealing, featherbrained loner! Thinking she can travel around and take whatever she likes._ The tom felt his hackles rise, but he forced himself to keep calm. Perhaps this would be all that the she-cat would catch; maybe she would move along just as swiftly as she had come.

"What's wrong, Moss- " Beetle's fur stood on end as Moss' tail wrapped around his muzzle to silence him. Moss growled, almost beside himself.

 _Will this cat ever stay quiet for more than a heartbeat? I honestly think he's still a kit sometimes._ Moss shot him a look, his eyes alight with frustration. "Yes, everything's fine, Beetle," he said through gritted teeth. "Now please, will you stop fretting over everything?" He hissed under his breath, muttering something unintelligible and turning back to watch the loner. Perhaps he had been a little too loud, because not a moment later, the bushes rustled and the she-cat poked her head out from the gorse bush with a small rabbit in her jaws. Moss watched tensely as her gaze surveyed the area, coming to rest upon his and Beetle's hiding place. For what felt like forever, the two locked eyes, neither daring to move.

"Whoever's there, there's no use hiding now. I know you're watching me," the she-cat called out as she hopped out of the bush.

Fear giving way to wariness, Moss and Beetle rose to their paws and ducked out from behind the cover of the bushes. A brown she-cat sat patiently with her tail curled around her paws, her eyes narrowed distrustfully.

"Who are you," Beetle prompted with a tired yawn.

"Why don't you tell me first," the she-cat snapped impatiently. " _You_ were the ones watching me." Her eyes darted from one cat to the other as she watched them with cold suspicion. _Definitely a cat that I would love to spend a moon around,_ Moss thought sarcastically to himself.

"My name is Moss," the white-and-black tom responded with an indifferent flick of an ear. "And this is Beetle," he meowed with a nod towards his exhausted companion, who dipped his head politely to the she-cat. Stepping closer to her, Moss' whiskers twitched in unspoken fear, his green eyes flashing in the moonlight. "Your turn," he said flatly, silently wishing he could be anywhere else at the moment.

"I am Song," she meowed cordially. Glancing towards her kit, she added, "That over there is my kit, Rain."

"May I ask why you're hunting on our territory?" Moss looked down at her catch, a small rabbit. Its ribs were showing beneath its fur, which had become dull and lifeless from lack of food, which always traveled with the cold. It would barely be enough to sate her, let alone the both of them.

"No," she responded tersely, picking up her prey and padding back to Rain. _Stuck up mange-pelt,_ Moss thought angrily. He dashed in front of Song, blocking her path. Song jumped back in surprise.

An idea formed in his mind and he found himself cringing at what he was thinking. _Let's just call it her "payment" for hunting here._ "We'll let you keep the prey, but you've got to give us something in return." His eyes moved suggestively towards the place where she said her kit was.

"What would that…" Moss backed up slightly as Song's voice trailed off. She hissed, spat and swatted at them, and it was clear that only the pure instinct to protect her kit was urging her onward. Suddenly she stopped, trembling; Moss left with several deep cuts and a shredded ear, and Beetle with a scratched muzzle. Her small frame quivered as sadness washed over her like a black wave, forcing heaving sobs from her lips. Moss' wounds stung painfully but he clenched his jaw and bore it. Song looked up at each of them pleadingly. "Please, not him! Not my kit! H-He's all I have left after…" Her eyes became clouded with sadness. "I'll give you anything you want; just let me keep my kit." With each passing moment Song's mews became more and more desperate.

Moss opened his jaws to reply, but stopped as Beetle spoke up from behind him. "I don't think that this is a good idea, do you really need to do this," he questioned nervously.

"You've got a lot to learn about our hierarchy, Beetle," Moss snapped. Beetle fell silent, looking down at his paws remorsefully. "As for you, Song, that's what I propose in exchange for the prey you caught here. You can either take my offer or leave it. But I'm sure you wouldn't want to leave here worse off than when you came." Song's eyes moved between the prey at her paws and her kit.

Song sighed, her eyes clouded with a sea of emotion. Moss noticed that she looked quite fearful. What he failed to notice, however, was that she was fearful not for her own life, or the life of her son. Her fear was trained on the future and the hazy uncertainties it bore with it. "I just wanted a better life for us both... one free from the conflicts of our home. Promise me that you will do for him what I could not." Moss nodded his consent. "Good," Song meowed hoarsely, picking up the rabbit. Moss watched as she stopped beside Rain, murmured a few inaudible words in his ear, and left in the direction of the mountains. Their gray shadows hung over her heavily, as though they understood her sorrow.

Gazing after Song with a tinge of regret in his eyes, Moss walked up to stand in front of her kit, a dark brown tabby with a feathery tail. Beetle stopped and sat beside him. Moss sighed as looked down at the small, defenseless lump of fur pensively. He looked peaceful, almost as if his mother had never gone. Letting his thoughts about the kit slip further back in his mind, Mosswhisker turned and looked at the young brown tom beside him. "You didn't have to do that; and you know it, Mosswhisker," Beetle said with a chilling glance in his direction. Mosswhiisker stiffened.

It was then that Mosswhisker felt the gravity of his decision pressing down around him. He felt as though a pit were forming in his belly, one that was slowly spreading through his body and filling him with irrepressible guilt. _Why do I feel as though I've made a huge mistake? Was I truly wrong?_ He inhaled deeply, pushing the nagging feeling aside. "I know that, Beetle, but she was hunting on WindClan territory."

"For _this_ kit," he replied bluntly with a small nod to Rain. Under his breath, he added, "You were acting just like Jay."

The black-and-white tom flicked his ear but pretended not to have heard. "What's done is done. Now, it's almost sunup and I'm exhausted. Let's just head back to camp," he said blearily, stifling a yawn.

"What about hunting?"

"We'll stop and hunt on the way back." Mosswhisker bent down to pick Rain up by his scruff, and then walked off stiffly in the direction of camp, feeling Beetle's disapproval raking his pelt as they traveled **.**

* * *

 **Allegiances:  
**

 **WindClan**

Leader:

Willowstar - long-furred white she-cat with pale gray paws  


Deputy:

Rabbitfur - very light brown tom with yellow eyes

(Apprentice: Daisypaw - pale yellow she-cat with amber eyes)

Medicine Cat:

Sedgewing - black-and-brown tortoiseshell she-cat with dark blue eyes

Warriors:

Larkeye - young brown tom with a gray underbelly and a torn ear

Mistclaw - blueish gray tom with black flecks

(Apprentice: Leafpaw - ginger she-cat with light green eyes)

Stonefur - dark gray, almost black, she-cat

Dustfur - pale brown she-cat with amber eyes and a twisted paw

(Apprentice: Molepaw - wiry black tom)

Stormfang - black tom with a dark gray muzzle

(Apprentice: Swiftpaw - tall ginger tabby tom)

Antfoot - reddish-brown tom with black patches and small paws

Rosewhisker - spotted cream she-cat

Heatherleaf - yellow-and-white striped she-cat with hazel eyes

Beetle - black tom with amber eyes (former loner)

Mosswhisker - white, black patched tom with sharp green eyes

Petalheart - blueish-white she-cat with pale amber eyes

Queens: 

Fernpelt - dark brown-and-gray she-cat with green eyes

(Kits: Silentkit, a mute gray she-cat with black spots and a black tail tip; Rushkit - black tom with light gray underbelly and paws)

Foxear - dark ginger she-cat

(Kits: Scorchkit - dark brown and ginger tabby tom)

Elders:

Haretail - blind white tom with matted fur

 **I hope you guys liked it! Any and all constructive criticism is welcome. I should have the next chapter up sometime tomorrow when I get finished editing it.**

 **Please remember to review! It will really let me know how well I'm doing.**

 **As I'm writing this, I'm eating a bowl full of popcorn. Which tastes amazing! ^-^ Yay popcorn! *gives everyone a bucket of buttered popcorn***

 **Until next time,**

 **Tranquil Rain**


	2. Fire in the Sky

**Hi everyone. I'm back with Chapter One of Howling Winds. Enjoy!**

 **Chapter One: Fire in the Sky**

Sedgewing found herself perched atop a rocky cliff face, the fur along her spine bristling. "How did I end up here," she mused. "Wasn't I just in WindClan?" Far overhead, an eagle screeched, seemingly in protest against the shifting, gray clouds that had gathered far in the distance. They, however, took no notice and instead continued on their way towards the cliffs. Wind began clawing hungrily at Sedgewing, passing straight through her fur and making her bones as cold as ice. _Great StarClan, I need to get out of this wind!_ She scanned the mountainside in search of respite, her eyes settling abruptly on the mouth of a cave which was partially shielded by the torrent of water that cascaded down in front of it. "That will have to do." Carefully, she picked her way towards it, passing large boulders and stepping over trailing vines.

Sedgewing padded inside. Every muscle in her body screamed at her in vehement demurral, making her tense. Stopping to scent the air, she noticed something; there wasn't one. The cave felt dead, devoid of life, except for a scattering of moss that hung drearily from the walls. It seemed far older than any cat she knew could have possibly remembered, the high arching walls smooth after seasons of punishment.

"I see you've found our home," a voice said with an amused purr.

"Who are you," Sedgewing questioned, her voice trembling from newfound fear.

"That would depend on who you are looking for and if you were even searching in the first place," the voice said, its owner — a dazzlingly white she-cat with a graying muzzle — stepping out of the shadows to stand in front of Sedgewing. The black-and-brown tortoiseshell she-cat's impatience grew.

"Can you _please_ just answer my question," she blurted out. _Foxdung!_ The white cat seemed unaffected, however, as though a light breeze had ruffled her fur.

"My name is Half Moon, young one." Half Moon smiled amicably, her dark green eyes glowing with warmth. Sedgewing remembered hearing stories about the Ancients and how they helped in the Great Battle from the elders when she was a kit. She knew that they were the cats that had lived here before the modern Tribe. _What is a dead Tribe cat doing in my dreams?_ Half Moon brushed past her to step outside of the cave, the wind plastering her fur to her body. Sedgewing followed swiftly behind and wondered why she had come here. Taking a tentative step out of the cave, the tortoiseshell moved to sit down beside Half Moon, flattening her ears at the strong gusts that were racing over the mountainside like rabbits on the moors.

"Why am I here?" Sedgewing asked as she shifted uneasily. She was watching the clouds that she had seen earlier, now a violent storm, move towards her with frightening speed. Her heart pounded against her chest and she felt like it would burst at any moment.

"Watch," came Half Moon's simple reply. Sedgewing focused on the mass of foreboding black clouds almost without thinking, eyeing them intensely for several heartbeats. When nothing came, she grunted angrily and lashed her tail in dissatisfaction. Wondering why in the world she was even brought to this place, she opened her mouth to ask what she should be seeing, only to notice that the Ancient was nowhere to be found. Muttering to herself, the tortoiseshell cat turned around to find that she was now looking at both the mountains and the storm from a spot atop a grassy knoll.

Suddenly, the sky creaked and moaned as though it were being attacked by some invisible force. Thunder roiled the clouds, causing the ground to shake violently, yet there was no sound. Quivering in horror, Sedgewing slowly raised her head to the rainstorm, her eyes widening as she saw the tiny droplets erupt into flames. Strong gales whipped throughout the valley now and she had to fight to keep her footing. Watching as the darting flames ravaged a path of destruction towards the cave, the she-cat thought she heard voices in the wind and she strained to make out what was being said.

"When the silence has broken and shattered, a storm of fire will return-"

The ground shook once more, throwing her to the ground roughly. She fought to hear the rest of what was being said as she got to her paws. She frowned. _What was that?_ _What were the voices I was hearing trying to tell me?_ Just then, the wind picked up again and the voices returned, louder than before. Sedgewing stood silently, trying to puzzle out the meaning of their words. "The sparrow shall guide him; guide who?" As she sat, her thoughts were cut short by a rush of noise that assailed her ears, the landscape melting into darkness.

She felt herself falling, falling endlessly through the black void of sleep. Its sheer emptiness suffocated her after having had such a vivid dream. Feeling the shadows pass around her, she spotted a ray of light far above her and she desperately clawed her way towards it, making no progress. She landed with a thud, the darkness dissipating as reality returned to claim her.

* * *

Sedgewing sat up in her nest, panting heavily. Her fur spiked in alarm as if it too were bewildered by what had just occurred. "Calm down Sedgewing. It was just a dream, no need to get so scared," she told herself soothingly. Her fur lay flat as she calmed down. It had felt strange to her that of all the cats that could have visited her, Half Moon had been the one to come. But her thoughts were set aside momentarily when a pale brown she-cat stopped in the entrance to her den.

"Sedgewing?" Her whiskers twitched nervously, eyes focused on another nest towards the back of the den.

"Dustfur, do you need anything, are you hurt," the medicine cat meowed anxiously.

"No, I just came to check on my apprentice. How is he," she asked, worry slowly creeping into her voice. Sedgewing glanced at the warrior and sensed her fear. Dustfur's apprentice, Molepaw, had been injured pretty badly the day before in what she had been told was a simple border skirmish with ThunderClan; though his injuries told an entirely different story. She had spent the entirety of the previous night trying to make sure that he would not succumb to infection. She scowled when she remembered how torn up he had been. _ThunderClan would be wise to watch themselves around the lake for a while_ , she thought venomously. Sedgewing sniffed at the cobwebs that crisscrossed the tom's fur. The herbs smelled sour, but she was sure that it was only because they were old. Moving to her herb store, Sedgewing diligently prepared another poultice while she talked.

"He certainly is recovering after what happened yesterday. I am sure Willowstar will order more patrols along our border with ThunderClan until things start to settle down." Sedgewing went over to Molepaw and began wrapping some of his wounds. "She isn't the kind of leader to declare war on another Clan for no good reason." Shifting to turn and face Dustfur, she gave a small, reassuring nod. "Don't worry. As long as Molepaw is here with me, he'll be just fine." Finishing up, she shook out her pelt.

"Done," Dustfur questioned as she watched Molepaw, who had slept quietly while the medicine cat worked.

"I am, but would you mind watching him for a moment? I need to speak with Willowstar." At Dustfur's agreement, Sedgewing ducked outside of her den and headed towards Willowstar's, a large gorse bush rimmed with heather. Padding inside, she saw the leader curled up in her nest. The young white she-cat was always thinking about something, whether it was news from a previous gathering or even the weather. Sedgewing smiled at the thought. Willowstar sat up at her approach, her white fur shining in the early morning sunlight that filtered in weakly from the outside.

"What is it Sedgewing," she inquired with interest.

"I have news."

* * *

 **How did you like it? If you would like, share your thoughts with a review. I'm also going to start doing a Question of the Day along with each chapter. It could be related to the chapter in some way, or not at all.**

 **QOTD: What do you think the "storm of fire" is?**

 **See you later,**

 **Rain**


	3. Unwelcome Arrival

**Hello once again. Here's the next chapter of the story.**

 **First off, I want to say that I'm sorry about the mix-up with the chapter order that some of you may have seen before I changed it (I had originally written the prologue, then said the next chapter was chapter two when I introduced it, like a dingus. Won't happen again, I promise.)**

 **This is the REAL Chapter Two. Enjoy!**

* * *

 **Chapter Two: Unwelcome Arrival**

"Thank you for sharing this with me, Sedgewing, but I'm not sure how this "storm" has anything to do with WindClan," Willowstar said somewhat dismissively. Gaze shifting to the entrance of her den, she stood and angled her ears to the growing chatter in the clearing. The white she-cat exhaled. "It seems that the dawn patrol has just returned. You may go now." Following the medicine cat out of the den, she turned and leapt gracefully onto the Tallrock. It became immediately apparent to Willowstar that something was off. All around her, she could hear the hushed murmuring of her Clanmates; some confused, others outraged.

"I thought they were patrolling the borders, not hunting for kits!"

"Where did they find that kit? Is it from another Clan?"

"Definitely doesn't smell like a Clan cat."

"Hush, Scorchkit."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Mosswhisker and Beetle push their way through the throng of cats to stop in front of her. Their pelts were torn and cut, their fur caked with dry blood. Watching with an air of calm seriousness that had been about her lately, she sat patiently, looking on as Mosswhisker set the kit on the ground. "Explain yourselves, please." She noticed their hesitation and narrowed her eyes. _If they stole this kit from RiverClan or ThunderClan, I will definitely hear about it at the next Gathering_ , she thought bitterly. She swished her tail, waiting for one of the two to speak up. "Well," she encouraged. Mosswhisker cleared his throat, and Willowstar saw him look at some of his Clanmates; his hackles raised in challenge.

"W-We found him along... along the border with ThunderClan in a pile of leaf litter." He shifted his paws guiltily, sending a small cloud of dust spiraling up into the clearing. A myriad of questions buzzed through Willowstar's mind like bees on a greenleaf day. What would the other clans say? Who's kit was this? Why were her Clanmates acting so hostile?

Silence fell upon the camp.

The WindClan leader flicked her tail in disbelief. She looked down at the two toms, her gaze as hard and cold as stone. Mosswhisker and Beetle both hung their heads. Looking out at the cloudy sky beyond the camp, she noticed the strange scent of wet stone on the breeze but thought nothing of it, dismissing it as an early leaf-bare storm. Willowstar then saw her deputy, Rabbitfur came to stand in the clearing, his face contorted with malice. She was shocked. Never in her life had she seen him this enraged, not even when the apprentices had gone off alone to fight a fox when they were kits.

"Liars! You probably stole this _creature_ from a kittypet," he spat furiously at them, his eyes locked on the little tom-kit. "You should have left that mousefodder where you found it!" A shocked gasp rippled throughout the crowd at his words, only growing stronger as time went on. Still, some murmured their agreement. _Have they become blind to the warrior code,_ Willowstar thought. Surely they knew that it was every Clan's duty to care for kits, no matter where they came from. Willowstar raised her tail for silence, glaring furiously at Rabbitfur.

""Rabbitfur," she said icily as silence returned. "I would like to speak with you in my den when we are finished here. Is that understood?" She did not wait for his reply, instead addressing Beetle. "What have you decided to call him?"

"We've decided to call him Rainkit, Willowstar," he said. "It was his mother's last wish that we give him a better life before she died." He shuffled his paws aimlessly in the dirt. _Is he telling the truth,_ Willowstar wondered. _Or is there more to this than he's letting on?_ Deciding that there's no feasible option left then to ask, she sat and observed the warrior in silence.

"Is there anything else you would like to share," she asked slyly. She spotted Beetle give a slight nod of affirmation, his head down. She dipped her head to the warriors. "Despite objections, in accordance with the warrior code, Rainkit will be given a place here in WindClan." Some of the Clan looked reluctant to agree with her not only because of the unusual circumstances surrounding the kit's sudden appearance but also because of what Rabbitfur had said. The small soul that lay, now squirming, in front of Beetle had wedged a rift in between her Clan, which Willowstar feared she might never be able to close. Her mood sagged, turning sour as she watched her Clanmates quarrel over Rainkit's right to be in the Clan. "Enough," she roared. "Stonefur, take Rainkit to Foxear in the nursery. Rabbitfur, follow me. Mosswhisker and Beetle, are those wounds of yours anything serious?"

"No," they meowed in unison.

"I would still have Sedgewing take a look at you." Turning, she made her way down the Tallrock and back into her den. She curled her tail around her paws, waiting for the deputy's arrival. Soon, he sat down across from her, a look of clear confusion in his eyes. Willowstar fought the urge to snap at him, to tell him how wrong he had been. He stared at her, awaiting what was to come. "Why did you say what you did? Have you got bees in your brain?!" Willowstar saw him wince.

"Willowstar, he does not have any righ-"

"That's a load of badger droppings, Rabbitfur! All kits have a right to protection from every Clan. How dare you insinuate something that you don't even know is true!" His outright disregard for the code infuriated her. She choose him as her deputy because she thought that he would uphold it, not watch it gather dust and wither away in the sun.

"Willowstar, we don't even know where that kit came from! Don't tell my that you're going to go start acting like Firestar, taking in cats whenever you feel like it. If you had any sense, you would see how wrong of a choice you've just made for our Clan," Rabbitfur retorted. "I've respected your decisions in the past, but this is something I can't, and won't, abide by." Willowstar saw the glint of his teeth, his lips curled back in a snarl. "Mouse-brained old fool! Every cat would think you've gone mad with how willing you seem to accept anyone that needs you. Don't you see; WindClan doesn't need to be every cat's protector. You should have let well enough alone." He huffed, turning and storming out of the den.

Watching him leave, Willowstar thought about her Clanmates responses to Rainkit's appearance until Mistclaw's arrival to her den hooked her abruptly from her thoughts. The blueish gray warrior stood rigidly in the entrance of the den with a troubled look plastered across his face.

"I scented fox near the RiverClan border. Should I take a patrol to alert them?" Mistclaw blinked, awaiting the leader's response.

"They don't usually see much trouble from foxes but I would still alert them. Take only a small group, we don't want to rile them. Mistclaw nodded and left to gather a patrol to head to the border. Rising to her paws, Willowstar squinted at the sudden brightness of the clearing as she headed outside. The sun hung high in a crystalline blue sky, moving swiftly among the wispy clouds. Crossing the camp to the nursery and walking inside, she found Rainkit snuggled up against Foxear, nursing, the queen smiling down at him lovingly. The leader watched as Scorchkit, a patchy brown-and-ginger tabby tom-kit and Foxear's son, sniffed at the dark brown tabby — whose small tail swished every so often — and wrinkled his nose.

"Foxear," he asked. "Why does he smell weird, sort of like wet stone?" He prodded the kit, who fidgeted in response. Willowstar caught Foxear's eye and held her gaze for a moment. She answered for the queen, aware of her distress.

"He was found near the ThunderClan border but we don't have any idea where he came from besides that," she mewed softly.

"Is he from ThunderClan," Scorchkit asked the leader.

"How about you go take some prey to Haretail," she said, dodging his question. "I'm sure he would be happy to tell you a story." Willowstar watched as the young cat jumped to his paws and strode outside to the fresh-kill pile. A dark brown-and-gray queen lifted her head as the kit padded outside, awoken by the commotion.

The queen smiled. "Looks like you've got your paws full with the two of them, Foxear," she said with a purr of amusement. Willowstar, too, found herself purring as an image of Scorchkit bounding around the nursery greeted her.

"Tell me about it, Fernpelt!" The queen paused and Willowstar saw her glance over at Fernpelt's two kits — Silentkit and Rushkit — who were sleeping contently against her belly fur. "Scorchkit is only a quarter-moon old, but he's so full of energy that it's hard to ground him sometimes. I'm worried though. He seemed to be questioning Rainkit just like Rabbitfur had. Was this a mistake?" She curled her tail around the kit protectively.

"Don't be a bee-brain, Foxear. Kits will be kits; they're bound to be curious about what goes on in their lives," Fernpelt mewed reassuringly.

Willowstar went and rested her tail on Foxear's shoulder. "How's he faring?" She watched the kit as he nursed, writhing and pushing at the queen's belly strongly.

Foxear sighed. "Good. But do you believe that this was a mistake, Willowstar? Maybe Rainkit would be better off with his parents, whoever they are... From what I heard earlier, a lot of cats don't think he belongs here. What good is he in WindClan if even its deputy won't accept him?" The queen kneaded the heather in her nest, clearly dismayed.

"No Foxear, I don't think that I made a mistake by taking him in. It was the right thing to do given the circumstances." Fernpelt moved to sit next to Foxear and licked her ears comfortingly while Willowstar went on. "As far as he will know, _you_ are his mother, and he will grow up a like any other WindClan kit. Foxear nodded meekly at her words and nuzzled Rainkit's head gently. She shifted to make room for Scorchkit, who had returned from his excursion to the elder Haretail's den. Moments later, the three of them were settled down and asleep. Willowstar bade farewell to Fernpelt and returned to her den. There, she sat at length, reviewing the events of the day. She would, she decided, talk to Beetle later about what had happened. Sighing inwardly, she watched the clouds as they slowly moved like ants across the sky.

* * *

Willowstar felt a claw jab her flank. She groaned and rolled tiredly onto her side. She felt the claw again, this time accompanied by a hushed meow. "Willowstar, wake up." She pretended to still be asleep, hoping that this pain in the tail would go away. "Willowstar, wake up," the cat hissed when she did not respond. Bolting to her paws, Willowstar bushed out her fur, her eyes huge from fear. She relaxed when she saw Beetle in front of her but noticed that he looked shaken.

"In all the stars, Beetle, you chose _now_ to talk to me? In the middle of the night?" She sighed, realizing that there was no reason to be mad with him. She had to admit that it was actually very smart of him to come now, when most of the cats in the camp would be asleep, to speak with her. "What is it," she queried.

"I need to speak with you about the... uh." He grew silent, the light of the moon that came in through the entrance silhouetting his body. Willowstar nodded in full understanding of what he meant.

"Is anyone else coming," she asked as she quietly as she walked out into the dim light of the moon. The white-furred leader flicked her tail, silently praying that he would say "no". Her wishes were dashed away when she heard his reply. "Who?"

"Just Foxear and her mate, Antfoot. I felt they needed to know the truth as well." Willowstar flicked her ear and followed the warrior to where the two sat waiting for them to arrive. "Follow me," Beetle meowed in a hushed whisper as he came to a halt beside them.

The tom led the three of them to an area not far from the camp, a small patch of daisies and heather where the apprentices would learn to practice running efficiently. Willowstar sat and glanced at Foxear and Antfoot, seeing the looks of confusion on their faces, the very same one that was mirrored on her own. Undoubtedly, Beetle had much more to say about how Rainkit was found _now_ than he was willing to say earlier.

"Mosswhisker and I, we found Rainkit after we saw a loner come on to the territory. She had him with her." Willowstar watched, appalled, as Foxear and Antfoot advanced on him.

"You stole Rainkit from a loner," they growled as one. Of the two, Foxear looked to be the most taken aback by this news, her fur was spiked in rage and her lip was pulled back in the beginning of a snarl. Desperately, Willowstar searched for a way to diffuse the caustic situation, despite her own anger. _Why didn't he just speak up earlier today without my asking? He could have saved these two a lot of trouble._ Taking a deep breath, she stepped between Beetle and the outraged mates.

"I tried telling Mosswhisker that it was a bad idea but he wouldn't listen to me," he meowed shakily from behind her.

"That's no excuse," Antfoot snarled, peering at Beetle with slitted eyes. "Don't you see what you've done?!" Willowstar shivered, at the rage he put behind each word. "Half the Clan hates Rainkit now because you decided not to speak up! I never trusted Mosswhisker, and now I know why! He's been influencing you, hasn't he?... You have about as much use as a dead fox, Beetle; we should have never taken you in when you came to us!" Willowstar jumped away suddenly as Antfoot flung himself at Beetle, his teeth bared.

"Antfoot," Foxear exclaimed as she rushed forward and tried desperately to pull her mate away from the source of his rage. _How could one small kit cause this much anger and hate? It's spread like a wildfire,_ Willowstar thought, running in to assist Foxear. Succeeding in getting Antfoot away from Beetle, she nudged the battered warrior to his paws and let him lean on her shoulder.

"I understand how mad you both must be, but I would rather you allow Beetle to finish explaining instead of attacking him." Turning to Beetle, she nodded. "Continue."

Murmuring his thanks, Beetle continued his explanation. "Song, Rainkit's mother, w-was hunting for prey on our territory. She caught a rabbit. Mosswhisker tried to stop her from taking it back with her. She lashed out and... and I guess Mosswhisker still wanted something from her. He chose her kit. It was strange though, she was sort of reluctant to let him go at first but then agreed, asking that we give him a better life than she could have. That's why we accepted, we knew that WindClan could care for him. She left after that." He looked at Foxear. "He smelled of milk, so he must have been born only a few days ago."

Now Willowstar was confused. _She allowed him to be taken?_ A mother's instincts to protect their young were stronger than any other and Willowstar doubted that the decision would have been easy for her. _Having to make a decision like that probably tore her heart in two._ She could imagine Song now, her dreams more likely than not filled with images and memories of her kit.

Sensing the tension begin to fade, Willowstar stood and shook out her pelt. Leading the group back to camp, she felt doubt weigh heavily upon her mind and tug at her pelt like the thorns that shielded the WindClan camp.

 _Oh StarClan, what have I done?!_

* * *

 **Whoa! That was long, wasn't it? Hope I wasn't too vague or off course with it. I think that's my longest chapter yet (2,704 words excluding these notes!)**

 **QOTD: None, because I didn't think this needed one.**

 **As always, please remember to R &R!  
**

 **Till next time,**

 **Rain**


	4. If Only

**Hello! I'm back from the nightmare known as the SAT! That was honestly one of the most stressful things I've ever done.  
**

 ***IMPORTANT NOTICE* Because of the way that my life is playing out, I won't be able to update during the week until the summer. You can expect a chapter or two at most per week until then. Sorry!**

 **REVIEWS**

 **Blue741776- I'm glad that you're enjoying it. I went through my chapters and fixed some of what you commented on. I noticed in the reviews for the previous chapter, that you thought that Rabbitfur's emotions were not exactly realistic, especially considering that he hadn't defended himself. I changed that little portion to help everyone understand better what his reasoning is. I hope that clears things up in regards to that chapter. I must admit that you have been an extremely big help, not to mention the support you've given me. I hope we can continue to help each other :)  
**

 **amberleaf4273 - Thanks! That cliffhanger was a last minute idea to be honest with you. ^-^**

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 **Please review guys, it really helps. You also get a cookie! (::)  
**

 **Here's the next chapter. Enjoy!**

* * *

 **Chapter Three: If Only**

The first thing Rainkit found that day was warmth, a sort of security that beckoned him towards the nothingness of sleep and shielded him from the waking world. The kit felt something prod his side and he squirmed, grumbling to himself while trying to avoid it. _Can't I just get some sleep?_ As he sunk slowly back into the silky folds of his dreams, he heard muffled bubble up around him and wondered, with exhilaration, what they were saying. Now he was interested; now he wanted to know. Was it about him, or something else?

"When will... wake up... play and see the camp," mewed a high-pitched one.

He heard a deeper, yet somehow much gentler, voice respond to the first. "When... is able... open... eyes."

As Rainkit began to focus on what he was hearing, it became clearer and easier to distinguish. He pawed at the grounded, locked behind the black gate of blindness that denied him entrance to the world.

He heard the same gentle voice, this time directed at him. "Come on, Rainkit," it said encouragingly. "Open up your eyes and see the Clan." Rainkit shuddered at the words. But what if I can't, he thought fearfully.

After struggling against himself for what felt like hours, Rainkit slowly opened his eyes to the world, only to shut them almost instantly as an intense, blinding light confronted him. "You're okay dear," the voice soothed. Anxiously, the small kit opened one eye, then the other as he started to adjust to the light.

He was astonished by what he saw, despite its haziness. Colors swirled listlessly in his vision, nauseating him with their beauty and motion. Even though he felt sick, he was happy that the worst of his fears had gone, diminished by his accomplishment. When his vision righted itself, Rainkit saw a group of cats sitting in front of him with smiles on their faces. He ignored this for a moment, instead choosing to survey his surroundings. He stood in awe of what little he could see outside the den. "Everything is so colorful," he squeaked, prompting mrrows of laughter from the two larger cats. When Rainkit eyed a dark ginger she-cat, he spotted a flash in their eyes, some unspoken feeling that he couldn't place.

He kneaded the nest he was in with his paws, "Who are you?" Rainkit searched each of their eyes, curious as to why he had suddenly become the center of the group's attention.

A brown-and-gray she-cat answered him, "My name is Fernpelt." She swept her tail around two smaller cats and licked them each on the head. "These are my kits, Silentkit and Rushkit. Welcome to WindClan, Rainkit."

Rainkit sat looking at his paws, which had sunk deep into the heather of the nest. _Is she my mother too_ , he wondered. Mustering the courage to face the group once more, he got to his paws. "Are you my mother, Fernpelt?" He stared up at her with curiosity in his blue eyes.

Fernpelt purred and shook her head, "No, that would be Foxear, little one." She pointed with her tail, directing Rainkit's eyes to a dark ginger she-cat. She nodded, answering his unspoken question.

Ecstatic, he leapt to his paws and bounded over to the queen, tripping over himself on his way to her. The queen, who Fernpelt had called Foxear, smiled down at him. Feeling a strange sense of relief, Rainkit smiled back.

Foxear nuzzled him, "I'm your mother, Rainkit." Laughing to herself, she added, "This big lug beside me is your brother, Scorchkit."

Rainkit found no time to greet either of them before Scorchkit launched himself at their mother playfully.

"Hey," she yelped as he battered her tail with his paws. Finding it hard to resist, Rainkit joined in on the fun. He scrambled up onto Foxear's back and clung there until he was told to get down. He slid off roughly as Foxear turned to greet a reddish-brown tom. "Antfoot, Rainkit just opened his eyes," she told him.

Antfoot purred, "Did he now?"

Rainkit nodded proudly and strode up to Antfoot. "I did, but what do I look like," he asked, feeling like an idiot for not having asked before then. He saw that Antfoot had glanced over at Foxear and Fernpelt, looking distressed. When Antfoot returned his focus back to Rainkit, the kit saw again in Antfoot's gaze what he had seen in Foxear and Fernpelt's.

"Well, Rainkit," Antfoot began as he looked the kit over. "You're a brown tabby with a big, feathery tail and two wonderful, dark blue eyes."

It was then, aided with this new information, that Rainkit realized that he did not look like any of them. The question that formed in his mind just then perplexed him. Who was he?

He scuffled his paws on the floor of the den as he mulled it over.

Sullen, he frowned. "Why do I look so different from you all," he meowed sadly. "Is something wrong with me?"

"Rainkit," he heard his mother meow after a moment. "Nothing is wrong with you. You just look different from us because that's how StarClan wanted you to be." Rainkit purred as she licked his ear, and he saw his father nod his agreement.

"Don't ever claw your own ears by feeling bad about yourself." Antfoot licked a paw and drew it over his ears before continuing. "Just like snowflakes, every cat is unique. Not one is ever the same as those around them." Feeling like an enormous weight had been lifted from his shoulders, Rainkit smiled and nuzzled his father.

He turned when he heard Scorchkit's mew. "Can we go outside now," he was asking Foxear. The queen nodded.

Rainkit gazed after his brother for a moment as he bolted outside. He followed shortly afterwards, "Come on, guys!"

Stopping only a tail-length outside of the nursery, the kits stood in awe of what they were seeing. Never once had any of them ever thought that the world would be as colossal and open as the expanse in front of them. The grass swayed and lulled with the breeze, appearing to map out paths throughout the rolling hills. The wind lightly brushed their fur, as though it were welcoming them home.

Rainkit laughed when he saw Rushkit tackle Scorchkit to the ground, rolling around in the grass gleefully. His insecurity with himself still lingered though, an ever-present shadow. He frowned, wishing it would leave him in peace.

The tabby flinched when he felt a tail on his back and turned to see Silentkit looking at him, her face bright and cheerful. He saw her glance over at Scorchkit and Rushkit and laugh. At least, Rainkit thought it was a laugh. _Why can't I hear her; can't she speak?_ He shrugged. It didn't matter a whisker to him if she could or couldn't, all that did was that she was his friend.

Rainkit saw her turn her head to where Scorchkit and Rushkit were. She was pointing her between both of them, then at the kits. Realization sparked in the young kit's mind, She wants to go play with them! Purring, he flicked his tail lightheartedly across her ear and padded over to the other kits, who had paused in their play-fighting.

As he approached them, Rainkit felt anger crash into him so hard that it was almost as if he had fallen from a cloud. He saw his friends staring up at a much larger cat; their fur hackles were raised in fury.

Rushkit hissed at a pale yellow she-cat. "How dare you call my sister useless just because she can't speak to you, Daisypaw" he spat with a fire in his eyes.

Daisypaw, bared her teeth into a toothy smile, "Oh, but she is; just like that brown-furred rat you call a friend."

Rainkit was furious with her. How dare she insult us! He charged up to Daisypaw, the same anger that had been in Rushkit's eyes not a moment ago now mirrored in his own. "Hey," he yowled. "Why are you being so mean?! You don't have the right to disrespect anyone like that, let alone a Clanmate!"

He watched fearfully as Daisypaw stalked up to him, her tail lashing. "What are you going to do about it, huh? Run and hide behind your parents," she growled softly. Hissing in his ear, she added, "You don't even know the half of it, runt." She was right, telling someone would only make it worse for them. What could he do but stay silent? Hopelessness tugged at his muzzle indignantly, pulling his face into a frown.

The kits watched her leave, called away by some cat on the far side of the camp. "Why did she go," Rainkit wondered. Hearing a reply from behind him made him jump. He and his friends spun around to face two cats who were about the same size as Daisypaw. One was a ginger tabby tom, the other a ginger she-cat. Rainkit noticed that scratches and nicks dotted the she-cat's pelt. "Are you okay," he inquired, staring at her scars.

The she-cat nodded, "I am; don't worry about me. Daisypaw, the cat you all were talking to before, left to go speak with her mentor; his name's Rabbitfur." With a glance at the tom beside her, she continued, "I'm Leafpaw, and this is Swiftpaw."

Rushkit watched the apprentices with a wary countenance, "You're not going to be like Daisypaw was, are you?"

Swiftpaw tilted his head in confusion and looked at the kit with questioning eyes.

Rainkit's mouth hung open in astonishment. Did he not see what just happened, how mean she was? He shook himself, trying to forget his brief anger with Swiftpaw. _They probably weren't paying much attention to us,_ he reasoned.

Padding forward to stop in front of the two apprentices, he swished his tail, brushing the dry grass underneath him. "Do you want to play with us," he mewed brightly, as though the events of moments ago had not occurred.

Leafpaw nodded, "How about rabbit cha-" She stopped abruptly, running and hiding behind Swiftpaw. "Don't let Mistclaw see me!"

Swiftpaw laughed and turned to bat at Leafpaw's ears.

Rainkit peered around him to look at Leafpaw, who was trembling. "Why don't you want Mistclaw to find you; are you playing hide-and-seek?" This caused everyone but him to laugh, and Rainkit felt his pelt grow hot from embarrassment, until he couldn't help but laugh along with them.

"No," Swiftpaw purred, trying to hold back a laugh. "Leafpaw slept late. Mistclaw said that he wanted her out training early today." The tom turned to Leafpaw, who moved with him to stay hidden. "You had better not keep him waiting." Leafpaw nodded abashedly and went to meet her mentor.

Rainkit's tail drooped at her departure. _What about our game?_ _I thought she would play with us too._ Feeling forlorn, he looked up at Swiftpaw, "Are we still going to play something?"

"Of course," the apprentice meowed. "Leafpaw was going to suggest something called rabbit-chase before she had to leave. Do any of you know how it works?" Everyone except Scorchkit shook their heads.

Hoping that it wouldn't be too hard to grasp, Rainkit listened to Swiftpaw's explanation.

"Basically," he was saying, "one cat becomes the "hunter", while the rest of you are "rabbits." If the hunter gets one of you, you also become a hunter, and have to help find the other rabbits. The rabbits can do whatever they like to evade the hunters, except for running around blindly through the camp. You all have eyes; you all have ears; you all have a nose. I expect you to use them. They are there for a reason."

The kits nodded as he finished and gave them each their roles. Silentkit was the first hunter, staying by Swiftpaw while the other kits scattered to find hiding spots.

Rainkit ran into the den closest to him — a holly bush surrounded by thorns. Twigs stuck up at odd angles, forming what looked to be a protective barrier around the den. Seeing no better option, Rainkit padded inside. He twitched his whiskers, scenting several cats inside the spacious den. Rainkit flexed his claws, "Who are you?"

"I'm Rosewhisker," said a she-cat close to him. After a moment she flashed a paw at him in warning, "Leave." A tom stood and walked towards Rosewhisker, clearly upset.

He glared at her, "Rosewhisker, he's just a kit!"

"Don't tell me what you think he is, Larkeye," Rosewhisker snapped. "He's nothing but another useless mouth to feed. I agreed with Rabbitfur from the beginning; Mosswhisker should never have brought him back, nor should Willowstar have accepted him. They're both featherbrains if you ask me." Larkeye motioned for Rainkit to leave, but he felt like his paws were rooted into the ground.

Rosewhisker noticed and snarled, "Leave, kittypet. Do you not listen?" Her remark sent Larkeye into a frenzy, his hackles were raised and his ears were flat against his head.

The kit backed away from the argument he had caused, fresh guilt entering his mind as he heard their continued quarreling. _Why do I make everyone so mad? And what did Rosewhisker mean by 'brought him back'?_ His mind became a nebulous fog where all he could see were the angered faces of those he had met, losing sight those that cared about him.

Rainkit's tail drooped as he trudged solemnly back into the nursery. Foxear was curled up in her nest, fast asleep.

Fernpelt looked at him from her nest. "How was seeing the camp, Rainkit," she asked while grooming a burr from her pelt.

Rainkit's eyes grew heavy. Everything that had happened today had drained him. His entire body was clamoring for rest as he made his way to Fernpelt. "Can I lie here for a while?"

Fernpelt shifted to make room for him. "Did you have fun today," she meowed with a hint of worry.

Sighing, Rainkit rested his head on the edge of the nest. "No," he puffed. "I was playing a game outside, but when I went to find a place to hide I met a cat named Rosewhisker in one of the dens. She told me to leave before I could even explain why I was there. Her and Larkeye got into a fight and were arguing about me." He pouted, not hearing what Fernpelt said next.

The heather screen at the entrance moved and Swift paw entered, Silentkit, Rushkit and Scorchkit following along behind him. The tom purred when he saw Rainkit curled up next to Fernpelt, but his mood turned sour so quickly that Rainkit wondered what had happened that could make him so upset so quickly. He stood and approached the apprentice, "Are you okay? You don't look that happy."

Swiftpaw nodded and cuffed Rainkit's ears with his paws jokingly. Feeling challenged, Rainkit leapt at the older cat, growling playfully and lightly swatting at his ears. Looking to his friends, he added, "A fox invaded the camp! Let's drive it out!" At this, they all sprang at the apprentice, who let out an agonized yowl of defeat and collapsed onto the ground as the kits piled on top of him.

Their fun continued for a long while, until they battled against sleep. Foxear, having just woken up, walked out into the center of camp and watched them with a smile as they played. Rainkit and the others stopped when she neared them, her fur stuck up at odd angles from sleep. "Okay, you five," she yawned. Time to go to sleep." They all groaned, earning a stern glare from the queen.

Though he didn't want their fun to end, Rainkit reluctantly obeyed, following his mother and brother back into the nursery.

Maybe we can learn battle moves tomorrow, Rainkit thought to himself eagerly. Maybe will learn something so amazing, that once that we'll become warriors right then! Purring, he drifted off slowly into his dreams, urged onward by the rhythmic beating of his mother's heart.

It would be the last time for a long time that he would ever know happiness like this.

* * *

When Rainkit awoke, he didn't see his mother's soft features, or the WindClan camp, greet him. All he could see was nothing. Wherever he was had been thrown into shadow, save for the refection of a cascade of water on stone.

 _Where am I?_

What happened next surprised him. There was a response to his silent thought.

"You are in the home of the Tribe of Rushing Water, Rainkit," said a voice from inside his head. "My name is Feathertail. I am here to help you."

Rainkit scratched his claws on the cold stone that lay still beneath him, "Help me with what?"

Feathertail's voice grew serious, "You must prepare for what is to come. Watch the skies where eagles roam, little one. The sparrow will guide you on your way."

The brown-furred kit shrunk in his pelt as he heard the thunderous crash of water against stone. His fear ebbed as he was pulled away into a new dream, one more vivid and real than the last. It was not so much a dream as it was a nightmare.

Trapped under stone, his body became dead to him. He was no longer able to feel anything but the pain in his legs. The only things he could smell around him were his own blood and the overwhelming stench of fear.

It seemed as though there was no escape from this hellish vision, no escape from the fate that awaited him.

If only he knew...

* * *

 **QOTD: What do you think about the kits? What about how things are progressing internally for WindClan?**

 **Thanks for reading!**


	5. Space

**Welcome back to _Howling Winds_. Hope I didn't keep you guys waiting too long. **

**REVIEWS**

 **Blue741776 - Thanks for you review! :D I hope I addressed that for you with this chapter. Here's your cookie!: (::)**

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 **Here's the fourth chapter. Enjoy and don't forget to R &R!**

* * *

 **Chapter Four: Space**

Rainkit purred and smiled kindly at the old, blind cat in front of him, "Thanks for the story, Haretail!" The white tom nodded respectfully, and for a small moment, Rainkit felt his troubles leave him. He forgot all about the anger, the contempt and the spite that was being thrown his way each day. The disparagement that he had silently taken had melted away. _Haretail was so nice to me when I came in here; I just wish that the cats I talked to a while ago could have been like that._ The thought only rekindled his doubts about himself, and he flicked his ears to banish it from his mind, as though he were ridding himself of a fly. At two moons old, he was more sure of himself now than he had been what felt like seasons ago.

Before Rainkit could depart from the den, Haretail's mew called him back. His eyes looked thoughtfully observant despite being deprived of sight. The elder's tail swished behind him as Rainkit neared him. "Rainkit," Haretail started gently. "I've heard what has been said about and to you since before you even opened your eyes, and I don't see any sense in it whatsoever. My advice is this: Never let those cats see that they've gotten to you. Just keep your head held high, young one, because those that truly matter don't mind, and those that mind..." He paused and gazed at Rainkit with steely conviction. "They don't matter a whisker." Haretail coughed and gestured to the clearing, "Why don't you run along and go have fun with your friends, hmm?" Rainkit nodded thankfully and left in search of Scorchkit, Rushkit, and Silentkit, heading towards the nursery.

Ducking inside, he looked around the den, finding no one. "Where is everyone," he murmured. A growl drifted towards him from the medicine den, sharp with bitterness and rage.

"What do you mean you can't do anything for her, Sedgewing?! You're a medicine cat for StarClan's sake!" _Fernpelt!_ Poking his head outside, Rainkit saw Fernpelt back away from the medicine cat, her tail bushed and lashing in anger.

Sedgewing wrapped her tail around her paws, appearing calm in spite of the queen's rage towards her. "Fernpelt, listen to me. I told you that I don't know how this happened. I tried, but I can't get Silentkit to wake up." Her voice was gentle, like she were trying to soothe a trembling kit. The only difference was that Fernpelt was not scared; she was mad.

Fernpelt spun and stalked towards the nursery. "You had better find a way," she called over her shoulder before disappearing inside. Rainkit bounded over to her, "What was that about?" Fernpelt's tail lashed and her ears flattened at his curiousity.

"Go find out for yourself, Rainkit; I'm not in the mood to discuss anything right now." Rainkit obliged and left her with her thoughts. Soon, he located the cat she had been arguing with and headed towards her. "Sedgewing, why was Fernpelt so upset just then?" She purred, though her expression was anything but happy, and led him to a sandy spot beside the apprentices' den.

The tortoiseshell curled her tail around Rainkit, "Something... something happened to Silentkit last night. Her eyes were glazed over and she wasn't moving."

Rainkit's eyes widened as he tried to picture what had happened to his friend. "I-Is she alright?" _Was she hurt?! Did she get sick?_

Sedgewing nodded. "She is, but I can't get her to wake up. Her brother is with her as we speak. He hasn't left her side since he found out..." She murmured something that Rainkit didn't. The medicine cat stood and gestured for him to follow.

They soon arrived into a roomy den that smelt strongly of herbs. In the far corner were plants which Rainkit had never seen, placed neatly into gaps in the den wall. Their intents and purposes unknown to him, he turned his attention toward his friends, who lay comfortably in a nest next to a small, gray pool of water. It smelled foul, but neither Sedgewing nor any other cats present looked affected by it.

Rainkit crept up to the nest, careful not to make too much noise and wake them up. Curling up next to Silentkit, he let out a long sigh and closed his eyes for what felt like a heartbeat before jarring movements roused him. Opening an eye, he saw Silentkit sitting across from him, her pelt nearly invisible in the shadow of the den. Rainkit observed her like this for a moment, shocked when he realized that she was trembling. She jerked her head toward the entrance fearfully, but when Rainkit followed her gaze out into the darkening clearing, he saw nothing. _What is she so afraid of? There's nothing out there._ When he turned back to Silentkit, he saw that she had moved, and was now sleeping peacefully beside him once again. His mind grew silent and he let the sounds of the night and his friends breathing lull him into a pleasant sleep.

* * *

Morning came swiftly, the sun just beginning to poke its head above the treeline as the camp stirred to life. Rainkit tried to ignore it but soon found that he could not. Stifling a weary yawn, he blinked sleep from his eyes and headed outside. He stopped to groom his flank as Scorchkit neared him. "How are you," he asked without thinking.

Scorchkit smiled, "I'm well. Can't say the same for Silentkit though." He turned and gestured to where the gray she-kit sat under the Tallrock, listening to Rushkit and swishing her tail in what looked like a response.

Rainkit's nose twitched. _She looks fine to me_ , he thought disbelievingly. "Why not? She looks like nothing happened." A sharp pang of pity hit him, and he winced. He watched on as the pair "talked", wondering how each could manage. It looked frustrating; neither of them able to react normally to the other.

The thought of this constant exchange had bothered him then, but he would later learn to cherish it.

Scorchkit's mew snapped him from his thoughts. "Rainkit, you there," he meowed brusquely.

Rainkit nodded.

"Good," Scorchkit mewed. "I was saying that Silentkit barely approached anyone after last night, with the exception of Rushkit." The brown-and-ginger tabby stood suddenly, his tail curved high over his back, and smiled. Rainkit saw his eyes brighten in amusement, and purred. He cuffed him lightly around the ears. Lately, Scorchkit had been getting himself into all kinds of trouble with Fernpelt, whether it was for putting thorns in Rabbitfur's nest or making a mess of Sedgewing's herbs.

Rainkit smiled, "You have fun with whatever it is that you plan to do, okay? I'm going to go talk to Silentkit and Rushkit." Scorchkit nodded, and Rainkit watched him pad off to the apprentice's den, knowing all too well that he would hear from him later that night. Rushkit stopped him as he neared them.

Rushkit's eyes were like ice as he spoke. "Rainkit, I know what you're trying to do and I think you should just give her some space," he meowed stiffly, with a fire in his voice the likes of which Rainkit had never seen. The black tom-kit turned away without another word, leaving Rainkit to wonder how everything could have changed so quickly.

With his hopes dashed, Rainkit turned away from his friends and went to a spot beside the nursery. He sat for a long time in that place, ruefully wishing that he could be someone else.

He glanced up to see the clouds roll over the sun, casting the camp in gloomy shadows. _Perfect; just what I needed,_ he thought scornfully.

His day and his mood spoiled, Rainkit got to his paws and padded into the nursery, where he closed his eyes and allowed the comfort of sleep to carry him away from the waking world.

Shadows crept into the edges of his vision, their darkness shrouding what little he could see of where he was. The place was new to him; it was neither the dark cavern screened with water from long ago; nor was it the sunny, rolling moors of his previous dreams, which had become his escape from reality. It was somewhere different entirely.

All Rainkit could before him were enormous stone peaks and the rocky forest that preceded it. Hesitantly, he started on his way, passing a crumbling stone den. Mice ran freely here, uninhibited by worry or fear of being hunted. A thought crossed Rainkit's mind. Maybe he could to catch one. Maybe then he would find respect.

He snorted at his foolishness, at his fancied idea, knowing that many of his Clanmates would laugh and dismiss him, just as they always had.

"Oh, you useless little kit," they would say to him. "You need to bring your head out of the clouds." His anger grew as he watched the mice dart in and out of the den. Unlike him they were free; they didn't have to live each day with the constant fear of screwing up and being berated. Growling, the tabby kit threw caution to the wind as he raced for one of the mice, his rage guiding him. He skidded to a halt as the mouse fled inside and mud sprayed out in front of him.

Rainkit stiffened when he heard voices from inside the den, and he pressed himself against one of the walls, inching his way towards the closest opening. Through the darkness, he made out three figures sitting across from one another. One, a smoky gray she-cat nodded her head. Rainkit couldn't make out what they were saying but knew that they were agreeing upon something. A brown tom nodded, dipping his head to her and turning to the cat beside her, who stood and followed him out. The pair padded past Rainkit, joined by a white she- cat. Her eyes were bright and eager, looking ready for whatever lay ahead of them.

Out of the corner of his eye, Rainkit saw Feathertail sitting several fox-lengths away, and he called out to her. She took no notice of him, her gaze still trained upon the stone peaks in the distance. He heard her voice just then, as soft as the sound of a calm wind.

 _What does she want from me?! Why am I here?_

He fled from back in the direction he thought the WindClan camp was in, his mind a whirling storm that threatened to unravel him. On and on he ran for what seemed like an eternity towards the setting sun, in an attempt at escape. Feathertail's murmurings and the thought of what he had seen still lingered in his mind as he awoke.

Foxear stirred slightly but did not wake up as Rainkit stepped quietly outside. He turned back momentarily with a sense of guilt. _What will she think when she finds me gone?_

Rainkit wasn't planning on leaving; it was a strange desire for knowledge that spurred him on, drove him away from camp, towards the mountains he had seen. He had never paid much attention to them before now, never seeing them as anything but the mounds of rock that they were; but now he was afraid.

Making his way behind the nursery and ducking through a small tunnel, he continued on his course, following worn rabbit trails past the WindClan trails wound this way and that way, turning and branching into so many paths that Rainkit thought that he would get lost. He continued on, rabbit burrows popping up as he walked. A gust of wind buffeted him, carrying with it the familiar scents of the moor, but what came next surprised him. Water. He glanced around, wondering if it could have come from a nearby puddle, but found none. His courage staggered as he realized the breadth of what he was doing. He stood shivering in the cold night air and watched breathlessly at the border as the stars of Silverpelt shone brilliantly in the night sky. Rainkit purred, warmed by the knowledge that his ancestors were watching over him.

He lifted his head confidently to the mountains, grateful for the protection and security they provided.

He no longer could detect any notion of dread within him. The mountains stood proudly before him, as though they were guarding him and his Clanmates.

A new feeling rose in his chest as he gazed upon them, one that he could not describe. It was something that he would not know what it was until he had discovered for it himself.

He felt at home.

* * *

 **Well, that's it for this chapter; I hope you liked it. If not, that is certainly okay.**

 **QOTD: What's your favorite season? Mine is winter.**

 **I love how beautiful everything becomes when it's covered in snow. Ironically, I don't like being cold. At all.**

 **Until next time!**

 **Rain**


	6. Deferred

**Hello, everyone! Welcome back to another chapter of _Howling Winds._  
**

 **I am very sorry that I kept you all waiting so long; I had a lot of important stuff that I had to get done over the past week.**

 **REVIEWS**

 **Blue741776- Thanks for your review! I'm really glad you're sticking with me. As for clarification on some of the things that are going on, especially regarding the "Storm of Fire", I hope that I cleared stuff up somewhat** ** **(Look for it later in the chapter)**. You'll just have to wait and see to find out what it really is. Good things come to those who wait.**

* * *

 **Sometimes, you can learn more by listening than by asking questions...**

* * *

 **Without further ado, on to the chapter!**

* * *

 **Chapter Five: Deferred  
**

Rainkit had tried to escape it.

He wanted so desperately to get away, to ignore what he was experiencing, but he couldn't. Desolation and sadness crowded around him, whispering softly the thoughts that would one day guide him.

Dismissing them, he glanced up at Foxear, who was staring at him with a mix of relief and anger on her face. Rabbitfur and Willowstar were beside her. She sighed and shook her head, "Promise me that you won't _ever_ do anything like that again, Rainkit." The blue-eyed kit shuffled his paws and nodded, murmuring an apology.

His mind returned with fondness to the peaks, to the memory of the alpenglow. The need to return to that place tugged at his heart and made him long for the moment when he one day could. It was a strange feeling, a strange sense of belonging that welled up within him. Rabbitfur's hard mew snapped him back to reality. "Rainkit, do you understand how worried you'd made everyone?"

Rainkit flicked his ears absently, "I do understand, Rabbitfur." He watched the deputy turn to Willowstar and whisper in her ear; she then nodded and beckoned for Foxear to follow her outside. Morose, Rainkit sat silently looking at his paws. Rabbitfur sat down across from him.

The deputy smiled calmly, "It appears that WindClan has our own little adventurer on our paws."

Rainkit's mood brightened.

He nodded to Rabbitfur, laughing, "I guess so. I never really thought about it like that, to be honest."

"Do _not_ let something like that happen again," Rabbitfur meowed derisively.

His happiness from a moment ago had desiccated, replaced by cold shame. For a split second, his earlier musings had returned to him, filling his mind with unwarranted doubts. "I'm sorry, Rabbitfur, I won't do that again."

The shaggy kit shivered slightly, rising to his paws and heading for the entrance.

Rabbitfur blocked his path with his tail. "Rainkit, I'm serious about what I said." His voice grew serious."I don't want to have to have Mosswhisker or Beetle take you back." _  
_

An eerie silence reigned for what felt like a moon before Rabbitfur permitted Rainkit to leave.

 _Take me back to where,_ Rainkit wondered as he exited the stuffy den. His heartbeat quickened. _What did Rabbitfur mean_? He was WindClan cat, and he never wanted to leave.

Rainkit stumbled, sending up a cloud of dust as his breath left him suddenly. Shakily, he stood, panting, and shook the dirt from his pelt. _Watch where you walk, Rainkit,_ he chided himself.

 _Maybe Sedgewing can give me something for my breathing,_ the brown tabby kit thought, sucking in a lungful of air. He searched the camp, hoping to find her somewhere in the dry, sunbaked clearing. He heard a meow from behind him and turned.

 _Molepaw. What does he want?_

The black-furred apprentice smiled as he looked him over, "What happened to you, Rainkit? No wait; let me guess, you tripped over those clumsy paws of yours and fell into a thorn bush near the edge of camp?" He grinned. "How about we get Willowstar to change your name? I think that "Rabbitbrain" would be be a great warrior name for you." The apprentice purred when he saw Rainkit frown, "I'm just joking with you." He flicked the kit lightly over the ears and padded away towards the apprentice's den, his long tail swishing behind him.

Rainkit winced, reminded by the sudden jolt of pain in his chest of what he had been planning to do. Hurriedly, he headed towards the medicine den.

As he walked, he saw a flash of gray out of the corner of his eye. Rainkit wondered silently about who or what it could have been, but continued to the medicine den.

Hushed murmurs found him pressed against the wall of the den, and he soon crept slowly towards the entrance with the hope of hearing what was being said more clearly. The world seemed to stop in that moment. Nothing else mattered except what was being said here, and he had the strange feeling that somehow this exchange was important.

Rainkit slowly peered around the entrance. Though he could not clearly make out who was inside through the shadows, he was close enough now that he could easily hear what was being said.

"I know that Rainkit is different; I know that he isn't... But that doesn't mean you should listen to Rabbitfur." The cat's, his mother's, voice trailed off momentarily before starting back up again. She sounded angrier than she had a moment ago. "I don't know where you got this idea of yours. I don't know how you could possibly think that this "Storm of Fire" could relate to any cat in WindClan, Sedgewing." A soft thump told Rainkit that the she had sat down, obviously becoming frustrated by the conversation.

A second cat, which Rainkit recognized as Willowstar, spoke up. "What do you want us to do, Foxear? We don't even know if what Sedgewing has said is even true right now. On top of that, we have no clue when it will happen... if it even does." She sighed, "We won't be sending him back, Foxear."

Rainkit's mind flashed back to what Rabbitfur told him not too long ago. Why was Willowstar echoing him, and what did they mean?

Feathertail's stern voice ringing throughout his mind cut into Rainkit's thoughts. "Now is not the time to be asking questions, Rainkit, so listen."

This only made the questions come quicker, and he found it hard not to ignore what she had said.

 _What is so important that I can't know about it,_ Rainkit questioned. He thought he heard Feathertail growl, but said nothing. _Why won't you explain anything to me?!_

"Some things reveal themselves on their own time," she responded with aggravation. "You will know why they are being said here when the time is right. Now is not that time; now is the time for you to prepare yourself for your future... You have a long path ahead of you." She left his mind without another word.

He sighed, both saddened and relieved at her departure, turning his attention again to the conversation inside the den.

"I understand, Sedgewing; I will try to keep this from him as long as I can. Yet all things must come to an end. He will find out eventually," his mother meowed with an ominous sort of tone that bothered Rainkit. Startled by Foxear and Willowstar's sudden exit, he watched them pass. Now he could attend to himself. Shouldering his way into the den, Rainkit saw the medicine cat sitting in silence.

Rainkit's whiskers twitched anxiously. "Sedgewing? I was wondering if you could give me something for for my chest. I fell earlier and now it feels like I can't breathe all that well."

The tortoiseshell shook herself, as though startled. "O-Of course, Rainkit. I'll get you some coltsfoot."

Moments later, a strange smelling, green pulp was set at the kit's paw—it was wrapped gently in a small leaf. Tentatively, he approached it, as though it was one of the hawks that Foxear had warned him of. He wrinkled his nose but ate it after much coaxing. "Thanks, Sedgewing, I feel much better now. Thank you."

Sharp pain seized Rainkit's chest and he felt himself stumble.

Eyes screwed shut from pain, the brown-furred kit began slipping in and out of consciousness. Somewhere in the distance, he could hear panicked yelling and the rush of pawsteps which followed. Rainkit fought against his slipping mind. He needed to know why this had happened to him.

Foxear's voice dispelled, momentarily, the black clouds that were amassing in his mind. "What happened to him? What happened to my kit?!"

Sedgewing's voice was troubled. "I don't know what happened. I-I had given him some coltsfoot for his breathing and then he just collapsed in front of me... He probably had a bad reaction to it."

A flicker of movement caught Rainkit's eye. Foxear had moved to stand beside him now. She was murmuring softly, sadly, telling him not to leave.

How foolish she was to believe he was dying. There was no way he would allow that to happen if he were, not when he still had so much more left to do in his life.

With a strange sense of certainty, Rainkit knew that he would return to her and WindClan. It was then that he smiled, relishing for a moment the unusual smells that he found nestled deep in the thickening darkness. These new sensations and scents confused him; never once had he truly experienced them, but it was as though he had been around them for all of the two moons of his life. They were foreign yet familiar, and he latched on to that familiarity as it pulled him deeper into the shadows towards lands unknown.

* * *

Rainkit looked around in astonishment at the brightness of the landscape before him. There were no clouds, and the sun shone down radiantly from its place in the sky. A ridge of gray mountains sat on the horizon, casting their shadow far across the hills. Bright flowers dotted the landscape, visited every so often by the bees that floated busily between them.

Smiling, he noted the feeling of serenity this place offered him. He would stay here forever if he had not had any place to return to. His attention shifted to the bees—their once striped bodies now completely yellow—as they darted around.

Mesmerized, he watched them for a while as they went about their work, unaware of the two cats that had stopped beside him. The pair purred, eyeing him fondly.

Startled, the kit whipped around, relieved only slightly at the sight of Feathertail. She always appeared to him without warning in his dreams, whether he had wanted her to or not, but he took comfort in that fact. It was the second cat that frightened him.

This cat was scrawny, with bulging, blind eyes and a scarred body. There were only a few small tufts of fur left on them, the rest lost to the demands of time.

Rainkit gazed up at him with fear in his eyes, "Are you Feathertail's friend?"

"I am no cat's friend," he responded shortly. "My name is Rock, and I have come only to tell you what you need to know. Listen very carefully; you _must_ remember this... When the silence has broken and shattered, a storm of fire will return to lash out at the sky."

Rainkit gasped, "I overheard my mother talking about that 'storm of fire' thing earlier! Do you know what it means?"

Rock nodded, "I do. But for now, you must not let your emotions cloud your judgment, for it will only hasten the storm's arrival." He turned to Feathertail, his blind eyes locking with hers for a heartbeat. She shook her head and Rock nodded in response. Rainkit understood that some silent agreement had just been made between the two. His thin, ratlike tail swished behind him, and he slowly began to vanish from sight.

Thunder boomed overhead as a fierce, pelting rain struck the ground. Rainkit shivered, silently cursing his namesake. Shutting his eyes, he prayed to StarClan for an end to the storms that had plagued his dreams.

 _Why do my dreams always end like this? Can't I ever dream of a sunny day?_

Rainkit stiffened when he felt Feathertail curl her tail around him and draw him closer, and relaxed as he was gently lifted from the ground. On the outside he was calm but on the inside he felt hollow.

For the umpteenth time that day he had been left without answers.

* * *

The first thing that Rainkit saw when he woke was Foxear's smiling face, beaming down at him with joy and relief; his brother and friends had crowded around him. "I'm so glad you're okay," she mewed, licking his ears lovingly. He pushed his mother away gently, gazing into her eyes when she turned back to him. His mother's face grew concerned.

"What does 'storm of fire' mean?" Foxear flinched as he asked this.

"It-It's nothing, dear. Don't worry yourself about it," she answered quickly.

Rainkit felt her bristle beside him. "Are you sure?"

Rushkit padded to stand in front of Rainkit, "Why wouldn't she be?" Rainkit shrugged.

"Why don't we let Rainkit rest, guys," Scorchkit struck in. "He's been through a lot over the past two days."

Rainkit's mind went blank from disbelief _. Two days?!_ He sighed. Rest would do him good right now. Rest could help him think clearer and sort out the mess of information he had acquired.

The blue-eyed, two moon old kit rested his muzzle on the edge of the nest, remembering bitterly all the times where information had been withheld from him recently.

 _Will I ever have an answer?_

* * *

 **What did you guys think? *Don't forget to share your thoughts with a review!***

 **QOTD: What's your favorite Easter tradition? Or, (if you don't celebrate Easter at this time of year), what's your favorite holiday tradition in general?**

 **Mine is coloring Easter eggs with my family.**

 **Until next time,**

 **Rain**


	7. Inglorious Revelations

**Hi, everybody. Welcome back to _Howling Winds_. I went on vacation recently, which is why you probably haven't seen much of me for a while. This chapter is, in part, the culmination of a bit of reading I did on my vacation. It took me a long time to write because of all the other things that I needed to get done after I got back. Sorry.**

 ***NOTE*: This pattern may or may not continue until well into May seeing as I have some very important things coming up during that month.  
**

 **While reading during my vacation, I learned a lot about what I was and wasn't doing in terms of grammar. (I hope you see how much I've improved from last chapter :) ) I've gotten great reviews on this so far and am excited to see this story through to the end with all of you guys.  
**

 **Without further ado, I give you...**

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 **Chapter Six: Inglorious Revelations  
**

It was not their looks or their quiet murmurings that unnerved him; it was their silence and their secrets. Yet now there came a dull sense that something should be done. Before the kit stood his parents, who were talking in quick, low voices with the faint hope that their son would not hear what they were saying. How foolish they were to believe such a thing. He did hear them.

"Why would he ask you such a thing? How could he have known?" the kit's father whispered hurriedly to his mate. For the hundredth time, it seemed, he glanced over his shoulder as though he wished not to be run down. To the kit this was no big deal, nothing to fuss over, until it began to fuel his desire for clarity. Soon he struggled to remain silent and listen from his place among the heather.

"I don't know!" she hissed back irately. "I, for sure, never told him." His mother heaved a tired sigh, flicked an ear and looked up at her mate. "Do you think I should let him know about..."

The russet tom's tail brushed the dry grasses, looking like an angered serpent. "No, that wouldn't be a good idea. Think about what that would say about us! About WindClan!" The kit's ears perked up at this. What was his father alluding to?

His father's head shot up suddenly, turned in the direction of a thicket of thorn bushes. "We will speak more about this later, alright?" he murmured before padding over to a small group of cats that were settled next to the bushes at his mate's agreement. With a shake of her pelt, the dark ginger queen stood and walked silently into the nursery. The grasses that edged the den parted as she passed into the shadows.

Taking this as a signal to emerge, their brown-furred kit stood and stepped clear of the heather. His ears twitched as he gazed around the camp, thinking momentarily that he was safe from being hounded upon. He was wrong...

A warrior by the name of Stormfang—a blue-gray tom with frayed whiskers and a dark gray muzzle—padded over to him, his head and tail low. A smile spread across the warrior's face. "Eavesdropping, were we?" he hissed softly into the kit's ear with a tone akin to the harsh grumblings of a fox.

The kit shook his head defensively, "N-No, I wasn't, Stormfang." His whiskers twitched at the pattering of claws, and he searched for a way to hide his distress from the tom. The warrior's tail swept gently around him and pulled him closer to his side. Warm breath touched the kit's ear and he shivered.

Stormfang's voice grew softer. "Now Rainkit, be honest. What were you doing back there?"

Rainkit pawed the ground dejectedly. What was he to do? He couldn't leave, unable to craft an a plausible excuse, nor could he stay silent. He was trapped like a fleeting hare on the moor that had mistakenly trod down into a fox burrow with no way back out. _I can't tell him what I was doing!_ "I was playing a game with my friends, why?" he replied coyly. Rainkit heard a low, faint growl rise up in Stormfang's throat, yet not a moment had passed before it was gone. Surprisingly, Stormfang's neutral expression transformed into one of curiosity.

"What game would that be?" he whispered, his eyes alight with questions. "A game of deceit?" He towered over Rainkit now, a wall of fur that blotted out the last spot of sunlight from his sight. "Or perhaps it was a game of lies. Was that it?" Rainkit shrank away, his heart thundering against his chest as the tom continued to press upon him furiously. "I have no doubt it was. I expected no less from you. Rabbitfur was right... You don't belong here, and we would have been better off to have left you where we found you." For a moment Rainkit was pulled back into the day from not too long ago where he had heard something similar uttered by the deputy and leader in turn. And here was Stormfang, mirroring them.

Seeing the kit's confusion, Stormfang crouched so that his eyes were level with Rainkit's, "So you don't know the truth?" Rainkit shook his head, scared to learn of the answer. "The truth, Rainkit, is that you were never WindClan. None of the cats which you unconsciously call your "family" were to begin with. You're nothing but another mouth to feed."

The swath of new information pounded angrily against Rainkit's mind, nauseating him. _My whole life is a lie; I'm not a WindClan cat?!_ he mused with a blend of rage and anguish. Soon it became too much to bear, and he flattened himself against the ground. He felt himself at that moment to be a miniscule ant, creeping steadily through the grasses, insubstantial in the ebb and flow of the world. A soft wind blew through his fur, yet it provided no comfort. Its only mission, it appeared, was to thrust sorrow upon the young kit—whether he wanted it or not.

When Rainkit looked up again, Stormfang had gone. In his place stood a bluish-white she-cat with pale amber eyes. He recognized her from seeing her but only a few times around the camp, though he had never sought out the time to ask her name and introduce himself. She was gazing down at him with such kindness, her eyes warm and welcoming. The she-cat's muzzle curled into a small smile before she asked him if he were okay.

He shook his head dolefully. "No!" he replied angrily, not thinking to ask her name. "I was speaking to Stormfang not too long ago, and he hurt me." The warrior stiffened and was soon snuffling frantically through his thick brown fur, on the hunt for any scratches the warrior could have given him. The kit shrugged her off, "Not like that..."

"Oh," she meowed pointedly, realizing at last what he meant. "What did he say to you, little one?" At first, he scornfully declined to answer. But as the silence between them dragged on, Rainkit flagged underneath the weight of his pent-up emotions. The wall which he had hastily erected within the confines of his mind deteriorated, crumbling away into dust as his feelings eructed from his mind with the strength of a swift-flowing river.

Surprising himself, Rainkit hissed out his feelings through gritted teeth. "He... He told me that I was never WindClan; that I was 'just another mouth to feed.' He said that I never had any family here. That _fox-heart!"_ He spat out the word with such rancor and spite that the warrior gasped in shock. Her face softened after a heartbeat, and her eyes flooded with a mixture of anger and sympathy as she curled herself neatly around him. With a smile Rainkit nuzzled her before sitting up as a thought came to him. _I forgot to ask her what her name is!_ "I never got your name," he said after a pause.

She frowned, "It's Petalheart, Rainkit." She stood abruptly and flicked him across the ears with her tail. "I'll see you later; right now I need to go speak with Willowstar." In her haste, Petalheart had left the kit with an unasked question: How did every cat know his name even before he had introduced himself to them? With a snort of frustrated curiosity he reclined into a sitting position, his head tilted skyward as he stared apathetically at the fluffy whiteness of the clouds...

"Why don't you come in now, dear. You've been out for hours." Rainkit's mother meowed as she nudged his side, waking him. The kit gazed up at her concerned expression peering down at him sharply. For a moment he debated if he should even to continue to think of the she-cat as his mother before responding with a clipped "Alright" and following closely behind her into the familiar darkness of the nursery. Rushkit poked his head up curiously from his place beside Fernpelt while Silentkit, Rainkit noticed, pressed herself closer to her mother. Her eyes were fixed on him as if he were a large predator. Rainkit sat beside Foxear, looking up at her with wide eyes as she proceeded to ask him why he had been out for so long.

"I was talking to some of the warriors, Foxear," he replied dryly.

"And how did that go? Were they nice to you?"

The fur on back of Rainkit's neck stood up as he shook his head, "Not all of them." His "mother" snarled, glaring out at the center of camp through narrowed eyes.

Scorchkit piped up from beside them, "Who wasn't nice to you, Rainkit?" he asked with a bright curiosity. The dappled kit's ears swiveled forwards, and he waited intently to hear his answer. Rainkit, however, sat rigidly watching him. Normally, he would have openly welcomed Scorchkit's curiosity, but now it just frustrated him. _Why is everyone so interested in me all of a sudden?!_

Rainkit saw Foxear look over at Fernpelt. "Take them outside, please."

"But I wanted to hear what Rainkit was going to say!" whined Rushkit and Scorchkit in unison. Foxear's pelt bushed up alarmingly. The extreme change in her demeanor had come so rapidly that all of the kits scrambled backwards in fright.

"Now, Fernpelt!" the queen snapped, Fernpelt bundling them all outside with the simple promise of a game of mossball. Foxear, meanwhile, had turned back to her remaining kit. "What happened?" Rainkit launched into retelling everything that he had told Petalheart to her. Her expression turned to one of shock when he finally finished his account; the unbridled rage that had taken control of her thoughts was evident in her eyes. Seeing her like this frightened him, and a part of Rainkit desperately pleaded for him to run, to seek sanctuary.

"I ought to march straight to Willowstar and tell her everything you just told me, Rainkit; that's how furious I am right now!" she meowed tightly. It was then that the leader entered, eyes gleaming in the half-light of the den. To Rainkit she looked ghostly, just like the cat he had met before in the sunny meadow, whose name presently escaped his mind. The leaders soft green eyes were a gleaming fire within the shadows, and an air of assuredness presided about her. She must have seen many seasons go by in her lifetime, Rainkit thought.

"There will be no need for that, Foxear. I already know," the silvery leader said.

"How?" Foxear asked blankly.

"Petalheart."

Willowstar shot the queen a look which appeared to imply a request before she turned and exited the den. Foxear stood, murmured to Rainkit that he was to stay inside, and left. If he had had the will to, he would have obeyed her, but curiosity was like an unexplored trail that clamored for the patter of paws. So there he sat, at the inner perimeter of the nursery, peering through a small and very drafty crack in the wall. Foxear sat several fox-lengths from him with Antfoot beside her. Willowstar sat acroos from the pair. Several moments later they were joined by Rabbitfur. The deputy looked rather indifferent, flicking his ears and pretending to them that he was listening until Willowstar nudged him. Shaken from his wanderings, the deputy addressed Rainkit's parents.

"I... understand your concerns. And I have taken it upon myself to speak with Stormfang about his treatment of your son." He said the word "son" distastefully, as though he found its presence unflattering. The tom's eyes were glittering with an unfathomable hive of emotions; and rather than looking like he was bothered by this, the deputy appeared to embrace it. Rainkit watched the conversation in a dazed stupor, preoccupied with thoughts of its cause. A vicious resentment welled up deep from within his bones at the thought of the warrior. At first he found that he was angry, then there was nothing; nothing but steadfast determination and the desire to prove himself. Realizing suddenly that he had lost his focus, he turned his gaze upon the older cats once more with the scrutiny of a hawk in search of its next meal.

"In any case," Willowstar was saying. "It would be wise to keep this hidden from him still, at least until he is older and can better deal with it emotionally." Deal with what _?_ the kit wondered. It appeared that her words had satisfied every cat, with each splintering from the rest, Antfoot and Foxear excluded, and going about their business.

Antfoot twitched his whiskers, "Is something the matter?" He rested his tail on his mate's shoulder comfortingly. Foxear bit her lip, looking too nervous to reply immediately.

Rainkit was only able to decipher small scatterings of what was said. It was as if he had tried to gather every blade of grass on the moor as they floated away on the wind, barely enough to piece together into something complete. His parents parted ways soon after, Antfoot moving to lie in a path of shade beside the Tallrock and Foxear returning to the nursery. The kit noticed dully that the air smelled coldly of frost. Leafbare was starting.

"What did you talk about, mama?" he questioned when she had settled herself. The queen seemed to tense at his question, her eyes dark and hackles raised slightly. She looked down at him warmly, yet there was a look of sadness nestled in her eyes. Foxear drew her tail around Rainkit and licked his ears lovingly.

"Nothing that important," she answered. "Just know that Stormfang shouldn't be bothering you anymore." Rainkit pawed at the ground doubtfully. What if if he did? What if everyone started to? What if...

"Rainkit?" Foxear nudged him gently, shaking him out of his thoughts.. He glanced up at her again with a faint prickling of fear. He nodded, half-listening as she continued. His eyes darted fretfully around the den. The dim shadows began to frighten him, with images of angry eyes concealed within their depths appearing before him. "How about you go outside and play your friends bore it gets too cold. I saw them over by the apprentices den." He nodded but on the inside was grimacing, remembering Daisypaw's treatment of him and his friends.

Without another word to Foxear he stood and left the den, hearing her meow a quick goodbye from behind him. Rainkit moved his eyes towards the apprentices' den, finding his friends playing with a mossball, Fernpelt watching them closely nearby. He bounded over to them, paws skimming the ground. They looked up in his direction and paused to greet him. Scorchkit and Rushkit asked him if he wished to play with them. Giving a nod of confirmation he joined them in their fun.

The day passed by swiftly with their game. The sun hung low in the sky, a tired glow of reds and oranges; its lumbering form stooped over the horizon for a while before for finally disappearing from view. By now, Scorchkit and Rushkit had left, too tired to continue on any longer, leaving Silentkit and Rainkit alone with Fernpelt in the starless, sable night. Silentkit waved her tail in a series of quick motions to her mother that Rainkit couldn't begin to comprehend. Maybe he would ask Rushkit or Fernpelt to teach him how to understand her at a later time. Now, however, his body protested against him and urged that he sleep. Fernpelt, having noticed Silentkit, nodded and led the two back into the warm, protective embrace of the nursery. When each was settled Fernpelt nodded and curled herself around her kits, shielding them from the cold drafts that entered the den on occasion.

Rainkit, having not felt tired since he awoke that morning, stayed silently awake; the day's events played back in his mind: his parents' conversations, Stormfang's anger, Petalheart's brief kindness, Willowstar and Rabbitfur's meeting with his parents, the game he had enjoyed with his friends and brother. It culminated with finality into an odd pooling mass of warmth and hesitation and sadness. He stood steadily up off of the dry, warm confines of the nest he shared with his littermate and mother and padded out into the chilly night air. An onyx-feathered crow squawked someplace above him, a cold chill running down his spine. With its screeching came an idea, arriving to him soft and downy, like one of the crow's ebony feathers, yet staying with him as something rough and heavy, like a stone.

 _What if Stormfang was right? What if I'm not WindClan?_

A voice answered him from within his mind—one which he recognized—sounding clear and smooth like flowing water.

"What if you were right?"

* * *

"What are y' thinking about, Hickory?" an older, patchy-furred tom asked a younger she-cat from where he stood below her. She had been like this for several hours, perched like a starling on the old, water-rotted fence that surrounded her housefolk's garden. Hickory turned at his question, the small bell attached to the collar around her neck jingling with the movement. _What does he care about what I'm thinking?_ she thought. The tom—a dark-furred cat with unruly whiskers, a crooked jaw, and the same golden amber eyes as Hickory—her father—gazed up at her patiently in wait of her response.

Hickory jumped down beside him, her smoky gray fur ruffled by the wind. "Don't worry about it, Everest. Just enjoying the night, that's all. Where's Tara?" Everest eyed her plainly, with no hint of emotion present on his features. Hickory flicked her ears in abhorrence. He always did this when she asked about her mother, never gave a straight answer, never seemed to care. It was as if her mother was, to him, like the dry, tasteless pellets that they were fed by their housefolk, only a thought in his mind when he needed or wanted her to be. She loved him, yes, but his apparent lack of caring for Tara infuriated Hickory, and she sometimes wished that she and her mother would leave him. That was why she had been sitting there on that fence, to escape her father. At least for a little while...

Everest gave her his usual crooked smile, "I'm she's around, Hickory. Don't get yerself so panicked 'bout it." Of course she wasn't panicked; she didn't understand why her father always thought she was either. All she wanted was the reassurance that her mother was safe, and that was all. Noticing her quiet ambivalence, Everest stopped and turned himself to face her. "Y' want to go look for 'er?" She nodded despite herself, as she always seemed to when he asked. Hickory followed several paces behind as Everest led her around the house and out onto the main path, a patchwork of black and gray stone. _Why do I always get swept up on these "adventures" of his? Better yet, why am I still following him? Tara's probably inside waiting for us._ Hickory let out a groaning sigh, whisking her tail from side-to-side as she plodded along behind Everest. The night was breezy despite the gracious cover of the surrounding houses, and a chilled wind blew through the cats' fur.

They stopped beside one of the houses, this one belonging to one of Hickory's mother's friends, a polite and kindhearted tom named Leo. Everest called out for him, Hickory waiting with bated breath for the tomcat to appear. When he finally did, he leapt down from the fence and strode anxiously across the grass to meet them. "Evening to you both. What can I help you with?"

"Have you seen Tara by any chance?" Hickory asked the mottled tom before her father could speak up. Leo stood in silence for several moments, probably searching through his memory for any possibility that he had. When he looked up at the other two cats again, he gave a nod of affirmation.

"I have; not ten minutes ago."

"Where? Did she say anythin' to y'?" Everest asked him, his voice sounding flat and emotionless.

Leo's whiskers twitched, "She said, and I quote, 'I'm going to go find the sparrow. It's very important that I do.' When I asked her why all she had said was: 'The sparrow will guide him on his way.' Bunch of rubbish if you ask me. No clue what she was talking about. Headed out that way," He pointed with a flick of his tail in direction of the spacious hills near their housefolk's place.

Hickory gave Leo a puzzled look, "Why would she go there?"

Leo shrugged.

"No idea, but I do know that she won't last long out there by herself. I would find her as quick as I could, if I were you." Hickory's heart lurched with a sudden and unexplainable fear. Her mother was probably out there alone: cold and lost, with no idea of where she was headed. It pained the she-cat to believe these things, but they came to her just the same. Everest's eyes glittered with a faint spark of sadness which was gone not a moment later. He turned to Hickory then, his eyes determined.

"Let's go," he said, with an air of authority that did not at all suit him. Hickory rolled her eyes but followed him back. They stopped beside the garden fence, looking out over the hillside. Hickory saw her father's tail quiver with excitement. She knew for a fact that he, because of his age, could not possibly partake in this, and she told him so.

"Why not?" he inquired of her bluntly. "I'm jus' as fit as I was back when you were born."

Hickory shook her head, "You're not coming with me; that's final. There's no way that you could even make a journey like this!" At last he seemed to grasp the true meaning of her words. His eyes filled with grief and he turned his back to her. For a small moment, Hickory came to regret what she had done and reached out her tail to touch her father on the shoulder.

"Y' think that I don't love 'er, don't you. I might never show it, but I do with all my heart." Everest murmured. "And I love y' all the same, Hickory. If I didn' think you were capable enough, I wouldn't allow you t' even try. But you are. That's why I know that you can find her and bring her back. You probably hate me for how I've acted around 'er, don't you? Probably thought o' leaving me behind, right?" Hickory winced. "Know that I never meant t' appear cold or uncaring; I wanted to know she was safe as much as you did when y' asked 'bout her earlier.

"Please stay safe. If I found out y' died, I... I wouldn't know what t' do with myself. I understand if you don' want to say goodbye t' me, but I wish you the best of luck. You were right about me not being able to even attempt this journey with you. I thin' a part of that is that I fear that I'll find her dead; another may be that I don' want to have to face the possibility of losing you too."

Hickory stood watching him, mouth agape, as Everest moved quietly away from her. She ran to him after a moment as a rush of compassion moved through her and nuzzled him. She didn't truly want to leave him, for she too was horrified of the same things which he had confessed to. Yet somewhere in those rolling, untamed hills was her mother, a piece of herself—and of her sense of family—which she could not afford to lose. With a final, heartfelt goodbye, Hickory scrambled to the summit of the rotted fence, which swayed precariously below her. The gray she-cat hesitated and glanced back only to find her father gone, and soon thereafter leaped off the fence and padded anxiously among the hills in search of Tara...

For several hours Hickory had grudgingly accepted the dull and bothersome task of surveying each burrow she came across, each scent trail that found her nose, each worn and twisting path. With each she found only a dead-end. There was no sign of her mother; not even the wind carried her scent. _Where is she?_ With a heavy heart Hickory climbed yet another ridge.

Life crashed down around the gray she-cat at the sight of what lay before her at its base: her mother's battered body lying in a pool of blood and silty water, lifeless and broken, a deep score of grisly claw marks along her flank. She murmured softly to herself, denying what she was seeing with furious conviction. _No! This can't be possible,_ she thought. _She's not dead. She's not dead. She's not..._ Her emotions began to cloud her mind like a dense fog. She would bury her, Hickory decided, as a final act of respect.

Dragging both her mother and her own heart to the would-be grave site, she labored until the sun rose from out under the horizon. Hickory stood in awe as it unfurled a golden wing, a ray of dazzling sunlight, and with a mighty heave pushed the darkness and gloom from the world. Murmuring a soft farewell to Tara, one of the only cats she had ever loved more than life itself, Hickory rolled her into the miserable grave she had prepared and began to cover her with dirt.

Then she ran.

On and on with no direction—and no purpose—she ran into the hills; from the grief; from the memories; from the undeniability of reality. Soon the exertion became too much, and she slowed her pace to a meager jog. She soon paused, panting, and gazed carefully around the large and almost endless expanse before her.

 _How large even is this place? I've been running forever, but there's still no end in sight._ Hickory stopped in her musings, for the first time noticing a dark blot on the suffocatingly green landscape. Looking more closely at it, she realized with a spark of hope that it was a house. With reckless abandon she raced for it, paws skimming the dry, brittle grasses.

Hickory's heart dropped when she saw it. It was nothing more than a tumble of stone; the roof was in shambles and weeds ran wild among its base. _At least there are mice_ , she thought, spotting one of the furry brown rodents darting hastily between a dim shadow and a clump of ferns. _Probably gathering food for the winter._ The mouse was making another pass, only to be cut off by the lash of a paw. Hickory stood in quiet anticipation of the events that would surely follow. The mouse, dazed from the strike, got shakily to its delicate paws and tried with no success to make a break for the ferns. It had been trapped. There was no escape for it now. Its predator stepped lightly from the shadows, bending down to give the mouse a killing bite to its neck. It went limp as a last, shuddering breath left its body.

The cat glanced upwards suddenly and caught Hickory's eye. _Oh no, is he going to kill me too?!_ Hickory's tailed twitched nervously, her mouth dry like a withered bone as she watched the stranger. She readied herself in the event that he might attack her, but he seemed disarming, and there was no hint of a snarl on his lips. "Would you like to share?" he called. Hickory had suddenly become terrified of what he might do and hundreds of possibilities buzzed through her mind, all but swept away at the toms reassurance that he would not harm her. He stood at the edge of the stone base in patient wait of her arrival.

"Who are you?" she asked when she finally neared him.

"My name is Sparrow."

* * *

 **QOTD: Was there ever an event in your life that you never expected to turn out to be a good thing?**

 **Thanks for reading!  
**

 **-Rain**


	8. Lessons: New and Old

**Hi, everyone! Here's the next chapter.**

 **Before I release you all back into this world, I'd like to take a bit of your time to express how sorry I am for leaving you guys without another chapter for so long.**

 **Anyway, here you go.**

 ***releases you into the world of _Howling Winds_ ***

* * *

 **Chapter Seven: Lessons: New and Old  
**

Clouds, streaked orange and purple in the dawn light, rolled along the sky, marching like ants towards the horizon. The grassy hills that were once full of life and movement had seemed withered now. With the ground growing harder, the hills looked dead, pale white-frosted husks of what they had been. Time seemed not to pass; even the sun looked as though it were frozen in place. Nothing stirred. Maybe it didn't want to. Leafbare would soon come, bringing with it ice, snow, and silence. It would come swiftly, uninvited yet welcome, unwanted yet accepted by those who remained above. Even if they wished, they could not escape it; so they set about preparing.

The only activity within the grassy clearing was the brief murmurings of disgruntlement from those who detested the nipping wind. Those few bore it regardless, knowing full well that they could do nothing to abate it. Wind ran through their fur, and they shuddered. More grunting. With hushed voices and hunched shoulders, the cats moved from the clearing and out into the tangle of worn, weeded paths that snaked through the hills...

A blue-gray tom padded along a much newer trail than he had walked before, made recently by the travelings of moorland prey in search of sustenance to last them through the cold. Following him was a short ginger she-cat. She stopped, her fur spiked out in protest against the wind. She appeared tense. Her eyes shifted among the pale orange stems. She turned to the tom with a questioning eager look. At his permissive nod, she pelted into the tall, wilting grasses, passing by several divergent paths before coming to a stop. She lifted her muzzle to the wind, scenting for prey. Having located a faint scent, the she-cat progressed deeper. The scent led her along a path which curved its way back towards her start.

Up ahead of her, the she-cat could hear a somewhat faint scratching. Her mind seemed to bellow a single word: prey. She moved steadily towards the sound, her green eyes alert and focused. The sound quickened as she neared, rising and falling in its sharpness. The she-cat was certain now; she had found what she was looking for. Crouching, she moved between a patch of stray rushes, her paws sinking into the muddy earth. A few tail-lengths away sat a small field mouse. It seemed focused more on the bounty of seeds it had collected than on her. She made her way towards it slowly. This way of motion did not suit her, more accustomed to speed than stealth. The mouse paused, causing her to stiffen and grow tense, relaxing only when she saw it turn its attention to another plant. Blood pulsed in her ears, the thrill of hunt sharpened her focus, her instincts.

She leapt. Within the mere moments that followed, the mouse was dead. Murmuring, she gripped it in her teeth and straightened. Her head shot up, ears twitching with the acute understanding that something was amiss. This was not a predator, but something far less threatening—or at least she hoped. She streamed toward the disturbance, her form a shifting blur among the grass. The wind ran alongside her until, up ahead, she encountered several eager and excited voices. She knew their owners. Why were they here? They _shouldn't_ have come here. Renewed in purpose, she sped towards them. Hanging stems of moorland grass and branches of wilting gorse whipped her face and stung her eyes until the grass grew shorter around her and she burst into a dim clearing. Four kits turned to her. Looks of surprised confusion and self-conscious guilt unfurled across their faces like the petals of a blooming flower.

Her confusion hardened to rage. "Why are you doing out here?!" she hissed quietly. When they did not respond she repeated her question. More silence met her words until a black-and-gray tom-kit answered her. He appeared reluctant at first, perhaps fearing the she-cat's anger, but answered nonetheless. "Why didn't you decide to teach them _in_ camp, Rushkit?" The kit fell silent. A new voice replaced his, another kit, this time a brown tabby tom. His voice was low and hushed when he spoke.

"Scorchkit thought it would disturb the cats trying to sleep, Leafpaw." The tom shuffled his paws in the frosty grass. "Should we have stayed in camp?"

Leafpaaw nodded sternly. "Yes, Rainkit. Scorchkit, you are the oldest kit in WindClan, and I expected you to know better." The brown-and-ginger tabby's ears flattened against his head out of shame. Rainkit glanced at him calmly _,_ thinking back to the conversation they all had had before coming here. _Rushkit and I told him it was a bad idea._ Seeing Leafpaw this aggravated frightened him. What if she told Willowstar, or Foxear, or Fernpelt, or worse, Stormfang? The warrior's words still haunted him. He wondered if there was a chance Leafpaw wouldn't say anything. Maybe it would all go unnoticed.

The apprentice led them back the way she had come. Here and there along the trail were several patches of hardy plants. Huddled together in tight groups, their stems bent close to one another, turned from the worst of the wind. Small insects scurried among them, their black bodies standing out against the white grass. Rainkit watched them mesmerized. They took no notice of the cold, pausing for a brief moment before continuing on their way. A smile spread across the kit's face upon seeing one of the creatures topple over into a patch of snow. Leafpaw's tense voice broke him away from his amusement.

Cowed, he hurried to reach them. Silentkit turned to him as he came up beside her. Rainkit's head spun with confusion., trying to track her whipping tail. Scorchkit must have noticed, because he turned his eyes to him. "She said, 'Did you have fun watching the bugs, mousebrain?'"

Rainkit's jaw hung open. "Really? Is that what she said?" Saddened, he glanced at his paws listlessly while he walked. A snowflake settled on the ground in front of him, a nearly hidden amongst the frost. When the kit looked up again, Rushkit eyed him with a perplexed look. Rainkit's cheeks grew hot from embarrassment, and a wave of emptiness rushed through him with the same icy sting that laced the wind. Could he sense his nerves? Did he know of the panicked thoughts that flowed like a river through his mind?

"No, " Rushkit purred. "She asked you if you had fun learning today." He pointed his tail to Scorchkit. " _That_ feather-brain just made something up." Rainkit couldn't help but laugh as Rushkit cuffed the tom-kit over the ears. Rainkit joyfully launched himself at his brother, rolling into a tangled heap of fur and teeth. Their play continued until Leafpaw's voice sounded ahead of them. Looking over in her direction, Rainkit got off of Scorchkit and noticed that a large group had gathered before the apprentice. Their conversation appeared heated. Its end came with a flustered Leafpaw settling off to one side. The rest of the group came to stop in front of them.

"You four should be in camp!" meowed a pale brown she-cat. Her amber eyes sparked with disapproval. "Leafpaw explained to us that you four were out here learning something, which you could have done perfectly well in camp. Is that true?" Her words hung in the air like icicles, no cat wishing to disturb them in fear of what could happen. Eventually the silence was broken, not by the voice of a cat but by the startled flight of a bird. The she-cat turned to a brown tom. "Larkeye, take them back to camp. The rest of us will continue the patrol." Larkeye nodded, hustling the kits in front of him towards the camp.

As they walked, the sky brightened, the world came alive. Dormant tunnels shuddered with movement as tawny rabbits, their pelts tinged white, exited their burrows. Rainkit grew surprised at the wonder of the world beyond the sheltered, guarding walls of the WindClan camp. Here lay more than he had seen before: a tangle of scents, colors, and life. Never had he realized to this extent the breadth of the world. Following Larkeye down into the dip that housed the camp and through a tunnel of gorse and brambles, Rainkit emerged to silence. Where was everyone? Movement shook one of the dens on the far side, revealing two queens: the kit's mothers,

"Where have you been?!" they asked in unison, their words appearing more relieved than angry.

Scorchkit answered.

"We left the camp because I thought what we planned on doing would bother everyone. It's my fault; I'm sorry." The kit's tail drooped, guilt shadowing his eyes. Soon they were led into bush beside the Tallrock which housed the nursery. A comforting warmth permeated the air, a barrier against the weather. Their mothers across from them, the kits sat morosely, none daring to speak. Panic seized Rainkit as he watched his mother. Inane thoughts buzzed around his mind. _Will we be confined to camp after we become apprentices? Will we_ never _be allowed to become warriors? Will we be forced to leave WindClan? "_ Rainkit?" Scorchkit mewed, prodding him with a paw. Shaken out of his daze, Rainkit looked up at the faces of his mother and Fernpelt once more. _  
_

Fernpelt flicked her tail, her eyes serious. "We both understand that you four weren't doing anything rash. But what if you had gotten lost, or hurt, or killed out there? How do you think we would feel? How do you think your fathers would feel? You can't just run off whenever you decide to. The world isn't a place for you to fool around either. There are rules that every Clan must follow. Do you know what they are all called?" They kits nodded. Of course they knew. It had been taught to them sunrises ago, yet they still remembered.

"The Warrior Code!" they chirped as one. Delighted smiles spread across their faces on seeing their mothers' praising looks.

Foxear purred, stopping a moment later. "Yes, and one of those rules that is accepted by every Clan is that kits are to stay within the walls of camp. Every kit is important their Clan. They allow the Clans to continue on for seasons to come. Without you four—or every other Clan kit—the Clans wouldn't exist." The queen let her words hang in the air, perhaps wishing for her message to be fully understood.

Rainkit pawed at the dry, crumbling earth beneath his paws, "Is that why you wanted to know where we had been?" He saw Foxear nod and his fears left him. Just then, his father entered, relief claiming his expression when he saw the kits.

"Thank StarClan you all are alright." He turned his attention to the queens. "Rabbitfur and Willowstar are waiting for us in her den with Larkeye, they asked for me to fetch you. Fernpelt, is Mosswhisker around?" She nodded. "Good, go get him and come meet us." The queen exited the den, Antfoot and Foxear following behind. Left alone, the kits searched for distraction from their solidarity. Scorchkit and Rushkit bounded outside, set on questioning the apprentices about the excitements they themselves would soon experience. Rainkit followed but planned on something different entirely. He had decided he would explore one of the abandoned tunnels. _Maybe I can look for trespassers!_ With a quick glance around he checked to make sure he was not being watched, then set off into one of the tunnels...

The eerie, hollow web of tunnels seemed alive. Gusts of wind rolled throughout the confined and choking paths, which only seemed to get narrower and narrower the deeper the kit progressed within. The noises made sounded strange, as though they were beckoning him, encouraging him to continue. A fire roared in Rainkit's belly, panic and fear gripped him. The dark spaces and twisting tunnels no longer held their previous excitement. Was it possible he has made a wrong choice in venturing down here?

The path sloped downward, leading into a large cave. For several heartbeats Rainkit saw nothing, heard nothing, until a rasping mew sounded from a higher ledge. "What have you come here seeking, young one?" _Rock!_ _How is he speaking to me here?!_ Rock answered his thoughts. " _I_ am speaking to you now because _I_ wish to, Rainkit. I do not abide by the laws of your StarClan. So I ask again, what have you come here seeking?" Rainkit stood watching the near furless tomcat. He tried to speak, but nothing would come out, his legs trembling with unease.

"I-I came her looking for trespassers on WindClan territory," he started, his voice a hoarse rasp. "I heard from Haretail once that this tunnel was used for raids a long time ago." Rock leapt down to stand in front of the kit. To Rainkit, his face seemed ageless, and his eyes, though sightless, appeared as though they saw more than any other.

"Is that truly your reason for coming here? Did you not come seeking knowledge; did you not come to learn the truth? You do not know the history of these tunnels: their purpose, the lives lost within, the successes and the failures these walls have seen. Once, these tunnels were used to test the wills and minds of those who entered. Now that record is lost because of the brazen act of a long passed medicine cat." Rock said no more, instead preferring to wait for an answer to his question. Rainkit turned away, unwilling to reveal anything. Rock's final words echoed through the kit's mind as he fled back into the tunnels. _"_ You are not who you believe yourself to be." The tunnels wound erratically, diverging and recombining until they became anything but clear.

The fear of being lost forever sent a wave of reinvigorating energy coursing through Rainkit's blood. He had passed countless tunnels, not caring to search keenly for the way to freedom. A blast of icy wind ruffled Rainkit's fur, disappearing down into a side tunnel where his path branched ahead of him. He followed it with no idea if he were traveling to the surface. Shafts of light shown through the darkness. Reckless, Rainkit raced for it, only to let out a gasp of pain. His leg trapped beneath a large, heavy stone, he struggled to escape.

He smelled blood.

His heart raced. Surely he would bleed to death now. No cat would come for him. They would find him dead here, so close to life. Darkness crowded his vision and all the light of the world had vanished from his sight.

* * *

Voices. He heard voices close by. He sniffed the air, and a sour scent reached his nose. Where was he? His eyes would not open. Was he blind? The murmurings grew louder, approaching him, then stopping. "Sedgewing, will he be alright?" asked a gruff voice from somewhere to his left. The cat answered him, her voice shaky.

"I'm not sure. He's lost a lot of blood." She paused. "What did Silentkit ask, Fernpelt?"

Rainkit thought he heard the queen's tail brush the ground. "She asked if he could play soon." He heard Sedgewing's reply, nothing more than a brief "No". Then there was nothing, no noises, no voices, no thoughts.

Except for one, the words of the ancient cat who dwelt beneath the tunnels.

 _"_ You are not who you believe yourself to be."

* * *

 **How was that?**

 **Don't forget to leave a review telling me what you thought.**

 **QOTD: What is your favorite movie?**

 **See you,**

 **-Rain**


	9. Torn Apart

**Hi, guys. Welcome back!**

 **First off, I'd like to explain a few things:**

 **-My writing style has changed considerably with this chapter and will probably stay this way.**

 **-I will be taking OCs. There will be form for submission at the end of the chapter.**

 **-If you hadn't noticed already, the titles of the chapters have dual meanings as they pertain to events within it.  
Keep watch for them and submit your guesses in a review. I will tell you if you got close in the next chapter.  
**

 **Thank you to those who submitted a review, it means a lot.**

 **Anyway, here you go, chapter eight.**

* * *

 **Chapter Eight: Torn Apart  
**

 _Sunlight drifted lazily through_ the slim crevice of the medicine den. Rainkit woke, his eyes bleary with sleep. Faintly, he remembered the day before: how he and the other kits had sneaked out of camp that morning, how he ventured alone into the tunnels beneath the camp to find the cat from his dream of the meadow waiting for him. What he did not remember was the stiffness in his leg. Stricken with panic, he tried to move himself, only to collapse back into the nest of scrub grass and dry heather he now found himself in. A gentle voice met his exhaustion. "Rainkit, you've been badly hurt. You _need_ to keep still."

Rainkit huffed indignantly, "Why can't I move, Sedgewing?" He wriggled his body in a fleeting attempt to free himself from the binds around his right leg.

The medicine cat's voice grew sharper. "For StarClan's sake, Rainkit, keep still! You can't move because you've broken your leg. The splint I put on it will help it to heal correctly, but only if you stop thrashing about like a cornered rabbit. Understood?"

Stymied by her words, Rainkit nodded. Sedgewing had turned away from him momentarily, attending to a pile of green, leafy plants, bundling them into separate piles and neatly stacking them against the back wall of the den. Returning to him, she held his gaze. "Mind telling me what you were doing in that tunnel yesterday, Rainkit? If I were you, I would be thanking StarClan that your father, Larkeye, and Stonefur were able to get me out of there."

Rainkit hestiated, unsure of how to respond. "I... I was looking for intruders at first."

"At first?" she asked, looking confused. She shook her head vigorously as if she were clearing it. The tortoiseshell's whiskers twitched, "Did you find any of these "intruders", Rainkit?"

Rainkit shook his head dejectedly.

"Then what exactly were you down there for? If you found nothing, _why_ did you stay so long?" The she-cat's tail thrummed the ground as she spoke. Clearly her patience was beginning to wane. Rainkit's eyes darted to his paws and then back up to Sedgewing.

"I-I met a cat down there," he responded at last. Now, it seemed he had the medicine cat's attention.

"What did he or she look like? Are you able to remember?"

Rainkit fidgeted as his paws scoured his nest, searching for a bothersome thorn. Hooking it with a claw and tossing it aside, he answered the medicine cat. "He was a big, blind cat. He had barely any fur on him at all." He paused, racking his brain for the name of the cat he had encountered. Then he found it. "His name was Rock. Is that helpful, Sedgewing?"

Surprisingly, she did not answer. Instead, the she-cat abruptly left, abandoning him within the den. Her voice drifted in fragments from the clearing outside but the surging winds muddled what the kit could hear.

The sun shifted, long shadows beginning to creep slowly into the den when a dark silhouette passed through it's entrance. Rainkit saw a flash of blue appear within the darkness, and knew that Sedgewing had returned. Wordlessly, she took to her nest beside the herb stores. "Aren't y—" he started to ask, silenced when he noticed the stony glint in her eyes.

Rainkit lay silent as the last shreds of light were chased from view. Outside, some cats had decided to stay for the night, to enjoy whatever time they had left under the open sky. Close by, Sedgewing began settling herself into sleep. Her breaths soon lapsed into a slow, peaceful—and familiar—rhythm which reminded the brown tabby of his mother and littermates, whose gentle breathing had coaxed him to sleep night after night. Rainkit's eyes grew heavy with exhaustion and a yawn parted his jaws as he sank down into the black waters of his dreams...

The sun sank into the detached gloominess of the horizon, and wind rushed tumultuously across a wide meadow. Towering trees surrounded it, now bare and frostbitten. Deep within the tangled web of gnarled branches, birdsong could be heard.

Among the roots, mice scurried madly in search of seeds, and roots, and anything that would satisfy their hunger. Several had stopped beside a warped elm, busily focused on the bounty that lay around its base. Beyond them, downwind, a slim figure had stopped. The cat advanced slowly towards the tree line, her eyes glinting in the darkness. A small rodent darted across the she-cat's path. She watched it hungrily until it disappeared from view. Giving chase, she wove between the slender trunks.

She was knocked off balance suddenly and stumbled. The she-cat landed with a thump beneath a strong oak tree. A dark form loomed over her, its teeth bared in a snarl.

 _"_ Why have you come here? Don't you know you're trespassing? _"_ the figure asked her. Rainkit stood watching, not on the ground but in the air. Passing clouds occasionally stood in the way of his view, and for a brief moment he wondered if he had died.

Powerless, he observed the scene before him.

The cat had gripped the she-cat's scruff between her jaws, tossing her roughly back towards the treeline. Two others had joined him, nipping at her heels as she fled. She was stopped before she could reach the hills, pinned against a rock.

"What do you think we should do with her? I say we let her go with a warning, that seems sensible." a brown, black flecked tom asked the cat. She turned to the tom, her black fur but a shadow beneath the moonlit forest.

The she-cat unsheathed her claws and glared at him. "I have a much better idea," she responded, smiling wickedly down at the cat pinned under her paws.

Time passed; the moon shone among a shimmering field of stars. A lone cat stood breathless on the crest of a sloping hill. Scents of all kinds seemed to drift around him, bathing his senses. Rainkit watched from his place among the clouds as the cat darted off in the direction of the woods, head low and scanning the earth as he trekked. Something had caught his attention.

The tom halted beside the border, his shadow stretched unnaturally in the moonlight. Rainkit grew desperate for a better view, to know for certain what was happening. All to suddenly was his desire sated.

The kit began to see what the tom was seeing. He began to feel every emotion that laced its way through the cat's head. All at once, all too suddenly, did he notice the battered form that lay at his paws. Blood began to seep sickeningly from its wounds then, as though it had been spurred to life by his arrival. Without control over what he experienced, Rainkit felt himself crouch down beside the heap of bloody fur, a dead and mangled she-cat. Her eyes were glazed over in pain. Words began to tumble soundlessly from his mouth with the strength of a violent storm, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

The tom stood, and Rainkit saw a large group coming towards him. Shock and disbelief were prevalent among them. One walked to the front of the group. Anger shrouded his eyes as he began to rail furiously against the tomcat. Still, Rainkit could hear nothing, faintly feeling as if he were trapped underwater. He saw the group advance towards him. He was surprised yet horrified that he could hear them. "Murderer! _"_ they hissed. "Fox-hearted coward!"

The she-cat's blood pooled around his paws now, turning the fur a deep gruesome color. He shied away from it, like a mouse afraid of a stray shadow. His lungs clawed desperately for air, panic paralyzing his body. Still the blood came for him, an unrelenting tormentor. "There is no hope for you, rat! You have ruined their faith in you! _"_ it seemed to say, barrelling after him as he forged onward, away from the enraged faces that assailed him with their accusations. "Deceiver! Murderer! Liar!... You are useless! _"_ The accusations passed through his mind until the point in which he he heard not those cats but all those he cared about yowling them ceaselessly. What should have meant life to the tom, to the kit, meant only death. What should have meant family, connection, unbreakable ties... meant only the horrible truth of his finite existence. He would pass. Nothing would remain of him but memory.

And so he ran.

Yet the horrid wave pursued him, a ravenous predator in search of sustenance, a cutting reminder of the world in which he lived. " _Let me be!"_ he screeched at the jeering voices that filled his mind, darting onward into the mist which lay stolidly behind him.

"Why?!" the voices yowled. "Don't you know this is who you are, a murder, an outcast?!"

Rainkit felt himself begin to slow, his eyes fogging against his will. "What do you want from me?" he heard the tom mutter feebly. He was surprised to hear a response. He turned around, the group of cats standing close by.

"Nothing is wanted of you, nothing except that you wake up." _Huh? Why would I_ —

"Wake up, Rainkit! Wake up! _"_

* * *

Rainkit jolted awake; his heart pounded excitedly against his chest. The kit forced himself to calm down, though flashes of his nightmare still haunted him. Sedgewing stood in front of him, her eyes wide and full of concern. Her mew greeted his ears, "Rainkit? Is everything alright?" The kit nodded, eyes glinting with faint traces of fear. What had he experienced? Why did he keep having these dreams? Confused, he turned to the medicine cat, his chest still heaving.

"Did... Did I wake you?"

She purred, "You did, but it's not that big of a deal. I'm glad you're okay." The medicine cat smiled and moved to check the splint on his leg. He felt her readjust it, wincing at the dull pain that coursed through him. Sedgewing drew back, yet there was warmth in her eyes. Rainkit watched her. _How can you be happy that I'm still feeling pain?!_ he thought, realizing all too late that he had spoken the words aloud.

"I-I didn't mean—" The blue-eyed kit's voice trembled as he spoke. He had hurt her; he had hurt a cat he cared about, who cared about him.

Sedgewing turned away, "It's quite all right, Rainkit." Rainkit noticed that her shoulders were hunched and her tail was curled defensively around her body. He saw her stand then, telling him that she would be back fairly soon and to stay inside, and exit the darkness of the den to the brightness of the camp. Curiosity urged his body to follow her and discover what she was doing. Pain shot through his leg, and he crumpled, panting from the strain. _I can't do this; it hurts too much!_

A whisper reached his ears, and the cool, stony scent of Feathertail wreathed around him. _Rainkit,_ _you must stay strong for what is to come. Do not allow what you feel to sway your decisions._ How could he not? The she-cat's voice was calm and soothing, reminding him of his mother. A pang of guilt struck him. He hardly ever saw her or Scorchkit anymore. Being stuck in the medicine den for so long seemed to have separated them. He suddenly longed to see them, to feel Foxear's warm embrace, to hear the laughter of his denmates. Feathertail's sharp mew urged him to continue. Outside he heard heightening voices, and soon he saw a crowd begin to gather in the clearing.

 _Feathertail, what's going on?_ he asked, but she was silent. Pain jolted his body forward with every step, until he soon came to a halt at the fringes of the crowd. Moving around them for a better view, he sat and watched.

A sour, fishy scent reached his nose. Out of instinct, and pure disgust, he wrinkled his nose. It smelled foul. _What cat could possibly smell_ that _bad?!_

"What's are these fishfaces doing here?" one cat called out, his voice taut with simmering rage. "How dare they come here unnanounced!" Rainkit saw Willowstar and Rabbitfur come to stand before the group, but not after Willowstar shot the cat a hard glare.

The leader's tail lashed angrily, "Beetle, they were led here by one of our border patrols. Next time, if I were you, I would think before I spoke." She turned back to the new arrivals, faces Rainkit had never seen. "What news does RiverClan have to share?"

A dark gray tom answered her. "I would prefer we discussed this in private—"

The cat from before, Beetle, pushed his way through to the front of the crowd. "Why? Are you scared, Jay? Whatever you have to say, you can say it here, to all of us!"

Rabbitfur turned to him, "Did Willowstar not just tell you to keep quiet?" The deputy's tail was lashing dangerously, whipping behind him like that of a snake.

Beetle stood his ground. "Are you going to let this mange-pelted fishfurs walk in here whenever they please?" Rabbitfur growled and turned away.

 _Why does Beetle hate that cat so much?_

Feathertail answered him, her tone calm despite flaring tempers. _Not all problems are ones that can be understood easily._ He felt the she-cat's breath touch his ear. _The path each of us takes in life is never clear, but it can lead us to our happiness, our struggles, and, quite possibly, our past._ As Rainkit was about to ask her what she meant, Rushkit bounded over to him.

"Come on, Rainkit. Foxear's been wanting to see you." Rainkit nodded, following the burly tom-kit to a spot across from where he had been. Foxear beckoned him over to her, yet stayed silent, curling her tail around him and Scorchkit as she watched the discussion. Rainkit sat in a state of indifference, unmoved by what he was hearing. Rabbitfur had long since returned his attention to the RiverClan cats. The cat Beetle had mentioned before was speaking now, his mew choked with sadness.

"Reedstar had asked us to come inform you of a fox that was seen prowling along our shared border." The tom, Jay, glanced down at his paws for a heartbeat before looking up once more. "But as we were coming to your border we thought of another one." A tom came to stand in his place as he retreated back. Rainkit thought he looked quite odd. He was light gray from nose to tail tip with a stripe of white fur running down the middle of his face, and one of his eyes was missing. He turned to Foxear, a questioning look in his eyes as he pointed subtly with his tail to the cat.

Foxear purred and licked him between the ears, "That's Heronflight, sweetie, one of RiverClan's warriors."

"Why does he look so weird?" he whispered.

"Hush," his mother meowed sternly.

The tom eyed the WindClan leader coolly. "RiverClan, and every other Clan for that matter, has heard talk of a kit that was brought into your Clan some time ago, Willowstar, but you have yet to respond to the questions that have come up." He let his gaze travel around the crowd, as though he were daring any one of them to oppose him. "Can you tell me why that is? Are you scared to let the truth be known? Are you scared to tell _him_?"

Foxear hissed, and Rainkit felt her pelt bristle beside him. "This does not concern him, Heronflight! He has done nothing wrong! What are you trying to do, ruin his life?!"

"Does he wish to know the truth?" Jay offered, a wry smile forming on his face.

Rainkit saw a black she-cat stride up to his mother—she was patched here and there with white, as though an unmelting snow had settled on her back—and whisper softly in her ear. Foxear hissed, batting the she-cat back toward the center of the clearing. When it looked as though the cat was preparing to retaliate, Antfoot came to a halt beside his mate. The she-cat growled, returning to her companions.

Antfoot moved towards them; his hackles were raised in defiant fury. "Jay, Heronflight, Splashfur, how dare you all attack my family! We have done nothing to you, yet you _insist_ upon badgering us with your faulty accusations." He turned to Splashfur, "You; I never want to see your pelt again! Do you hear me?! Never!" Rainkit trembled, his body racked with terror, as his father continued to rail against them. _Why is no one stopping him?!_

Willowstar caught his eye for a heartbeat before turning to the warrior. "Antfoot, go to the warriors' den. Now. Foxear, kits, please go with him." Rainkit could do nothing but follow miserably behind his parents as they led him to an old and abandoned rabbit burrow, sharp pain scoring his leg with each agonizing step. Mosswhisker and Fernpelt were following several paces behind, Silentkit and Rushkit in tow.

The burrow housed a small cave, and several nests lined the perimeter. Foxear beckoned her kits over to one, Fernpelt to another. Antfoot and Mosswhisker sat inside the entrance to the cave, their backs turned to the outside world.

Silentkit turned toward Rainkit, " _What was that about?"_ Rainkit shrugged. _Why in StarClan's name should I know?_

Again, Feathertail answered him. _Because it just might be important._ Taking her advice, Rainkit looked to his father.

"Antfoot, what was happening out there? Why were you so angry with them."

He grew tense. "It's just that some cats don't know when not to stick their nose where it isn't wanted," he meowed, eyes full of meaning. Rainkit then nodded, knowing that he was including him as well.

Scorchkit batted Rainkit's ears good-naturedly, "Don't be such a fuzz-brain, Rainkit. They were just having a small discussion; right, mama?"

Foxear nodded.

Feathertail's mew returned to him at that moment. _You will know the truth when the time comes_. _For now, remain focused on the life you have... not the one you have lost.  
_

Rainkit was confused. He hadn't lost anything. He had his family with him; he was surround by cats who cared about him. Why then, did he feel like Feathertail was right? Surely this was all he needed; this was all he knew. Yet, if this truly was all he knew, why had she said that? _She's just trying to tear me away from my family! Well, I won't let her!_ He started when Foxear nosed him abruptly to his paws, urging him to join the other kits, who had begun a game of moss ball in the remaining space of the den.

Reluctantly, he joined them, thoughts of Feathertail's indifference towards him still whirling around his head. On and on they went in their game until a loud meow from outside caused them to pause. A dark gray, almost entirely black she-cat had made her way into the den. Rainkit recognized her as Stonefur. Though she had only talked to him a few times, she struck him a outgoing and very caring.

Her blue-green eyes glinted as she peered into the den, and she smiled when she saw the kits. "The RiverClan cats have left; Heatherleaf got Beetle to calm down some. What about you, Antfoot, are you better now?" He nodded. "Good. You can all come outside when you're ready then." She turned to Rainkit, "Sedgewing wants to see you as soon as possible." Stonefur retreated from the den, back out into the cold clearing. Beside Rainkit, the other kits had continued their game; he, however, stayed where he was. Not long after did he decide to curl up beside his mother and watch.

They all seemed so happy. So, why couldn't he? Inside, he felt miserable, and though he began telling himself that he shouldn't feel this way, he could not stand against it. A dark storm began gather within him, his thoughts plagued by doubt and indecision. _I can't seem to do anything right._ _ _I feel so guilty._ I disobeyed Sedgewing! I made my father mad at me! _ With a sigh he curled up against the comforting flank of his mother and closed his eyes.

* * *

Sedgewing paced in front of Rainkit, her eyes a blazing spark of frustration. "Didn't I tell you to _stay_ inside?" He nodded. Of course she had, but he had been too stubborn—or was it too careless—to have obeyed her. As he was, he wondered if the medicine cat would punish him, confine him here in her den for another moon. He watched as she tested the now loose splint around his leg. She rebound it. "I don't know if your leg is going to heal properly now; you've strained the muscles too much."

Rainkit's mouth grew dry. "Am I going to be able to walk on it normally?"

"You might develop a limp if you keep using it recklessly, but I wouldn't let that discourage you, Rainkit." She angled her ears towards the clearing. "Would you like to go sit outside for a while?" Rainkit nodded. He didn't want to be cooped up in the den anymore; he wanted to feel free.

Sedgewing had stopped just outside the den, her tail curled neatly over her paws. "Isn't this nice, Rainkit, the cold, the snow?"

He nodded, "I guess so."

The medicine cat's voice grew more serious. "Just like the weather, the path each cat travels in life is never clear, little one. Just as you saw today, disagreement can arise from the smallest of issues. No cat truly can tell what will happen next. Our destinies are never set in stone.

"The winds could change at any moment."

* * *

 **How was that? Is there anything I could improve on?  
**

 **QOTD: Do you have a favorite candy?**

 **Form for OC Submission: (Restriction: Please, no warrior names. I have all the Clans filled.)**

 **Name:**

 **Gender:**

 **Appearance:**

 **Personality:**

 **Thanks for reading, everyone!**

 **-Rain**


	10. Eyes

**Hi everyone! I'm back with a new chapter.**

 **Reviews:**

 **Blue741776 - I completely get what you're saying about my decision with RiverClan but urge that you remember that there's a fine line between genius and insanity. Maybe the choices I make right now don't make much sense, but everything will in time. I assure you. Also, thank you for your OC submissions; I will definitely use them. Though I hope you don't mind if I alter one small thing for my purposes later on.  
Also, Blue, you got very close with your guess. The first was correct. The second was incorrect, and its answer was more subtle than you might think. It occurred in the RiverClan encounter you reviewed on.**

 **Quillfang (a recent reviewer on Chapter Three) - I'm glad you like it and hope that you continue to. :D**

 ***Important note*: OC submissions for this story are still going on and will continue until I shut them down at a later time. If you would like a character of yours to be featured in this story, don't hesitate to fill out the form at the bottom of the chapter.**

 **That's all I have to say for now.**

 **Here's the chapter.**

* * *

 **Chapter Nine: Eyes**

Rainkit watched in fascination as a glimmering shower of snow cascaded down from among the clouds, blanketing the clearing in soft whites and blues. Beside him, his denmates snored peacefully, content with the comfort and warmth of those around them. He, however, looked on restlessly at the world beyond the den. No matter how hard he tried, he could not bring himself to sleep. He'd wanted to run and play in the clearing like the other kits had, but he was confined almost entirely to the nursery for a long time. It had been two moons since the incident in the tunnels and still Sedgewing did not release him from her care, calling him back every so often to check on him. She had been surprised at first, wondering, with considerable curiosity, as to how he could have managed to walk so soon afterward. Rainkit had not responded then, because he himself did not understand either. Yet, a part of him soon came to believe that Feathertail had allowed him this strength, if only for a short time, to experience the meeting in the clearing. He was still not sure as to why. He awoke the next day completely exhausted and did not care to rouse himself from his nest in Sedgewing's den.

But that was long ago, a distant, hazy memory.

Now he stood and moved slowly from the den, teeth chattering in the cold. He grew panicked as he surveyed the camp. Snow had piled to about halfway up his legs now. _Am I going to be stuck in the nursery forever?_ He glanced back at his leg, silently cursing it. Now with a slight limp, he felt crippled, disadvantaged by his lack of mobility. Head lowered against the cold, Rainkit sat in silence until movement from within the nursery caused him to turn. Foxear had come to sit beside him. "Where's Antfoot?" he asked her as she drew him close with her thick-furred tail.

The queen sighed, "I don't know, probably off hunting for what's left. I'm sure he'll be back soon though." She licked him between the ears. "Why don't you come inside, before it gets too cold."

"I wanted to stay outside for a while." Foxear frowned, shivering slightly as she gripped Rainkit's scruff lightly in her jaws and, against his wishes, carried him back inside. Sitting inside the entrance, He curled up beside his mother and littermate, letting the warmth and sounds of the den lead him to sleep.

When he woke, groggy and sluggish with exhaustion, the snows had stopped. Scorchkit prodded his side, "Come on, Rainkit; let's go outside!" Rainkit hesitated, holding back a yawn and looking to Foxear, relieved when she nodded. Following his brother, Rainkit made his way out into the camp, where, with the worst of the snow gone, life had returned to normal. A bitter wind nipped at his face, cold and unfeeling. Scorchkit had gone on ahead of him while he had stopped, Rushkit and Silentkit following along behind him as they bounded happily through the chill.

He grimaced at the harshness of the wind as it lashed out at him. He saw nothing but white in the world and he frowned, wishing it would all go away. The kit looked into the distance, towards the gray clouds that were moving steadily towards him. He parted his jaws in a wide yawn, sinking to the cold ground and resting his head on his paws. His claws flexed in the snow, scoring harsh lines deep within it. Nothing stirred within his mind. He felt nothing but the freezing touch of snow and the fiery gaze of the dim sun. It looked to him as though it were watching every move he made.

Rainkit stiffened, spotting a flash of movement. Was there someone watching him?

Hoping to get away, he stood and padded towards the nursery.

"Is everything okay?"

Rainkit turned to face his questioner, a gruff warrior named Mistclaw. "Yes, Mistclaw, everything's fine."

The blue-gray warrior curled his tail around his paws. "You don't look like that's the case. Is there anything you want to talk about?"

After a moment of hesitation, Rainkit shook his head. Mistclaw narrowed his eyes before nodding and padding away to sit beside Rosewhisker. He saw the pair glance at him for several heartbeats before turning back to each other. Shivering, not of the cold but of confusion and anxiety, Rainkit walked over to the other kits and sat beside a mound of gathering snow.

Letting his eyes drift to the ground, his heart grew heavy within his chest. Snowflakes flitted quietly down around him, their beauty gone from his sight. He watched them fall to the ground and disappear among countless others. Soon, he turned his sight to his friends and brother, to their happiness. Forgetting what he was thinking would do him good, he decided as he padded over to them. They stopped when they saw him, their eyes shadowed. All he could see was a dark anger within them, not concern, not compassion, not sympathy, just anger. Were they going to snap at him, or eye him as though he were a newborn hare, too young and weak to defend itself against them.

An image of blood passed before his eyes.

Rainkit saw a tom, his golden fur shimmering in the sunlight, his green eyes narrowed wickedly as he looked down at him. He appeared to be saying something, of what the tabby kit did not know. The kit watched him snarl. Beads of saliva spiraled down from his jaws and landed on the ground. Struggling to free himself from the tom's paws, Rainkit soon fell back in exhaustion. He winced, unable to avert his gaze, as the cat struck him. The blow landed powerfully across his head. Then another. Then another. The enraged tom did not relent. He continued to screech at him soundlessly. He bit his ears; he scratched his muzzle; he clawed at his eyes until Rainkit numbed to the pain. This cat, this violent beast of a thing, lowered his head to him one final time. A single word escaped his mouth, barely more than a whisper..

 _Deserter._

Rainkit found himself unsure if it was just a word or something more—a warning, perhaps? The golden-furred tom grew crazed. Hissing and spitting like some wild, insatiable predator, he clawed at Rainkit, snarling all the while that single bone-chilling word.

Blood seeped from countless wounds like a steady rain. Patches of brown fur lay upon the earth. leaving the skin beneath raw and exposed. Rainkit tried to move, but felt his body breaking. Every bone, every muscle ached, torn apart by agonizing pain. He felt like dying right then. At least that would have saved him from this nightmare.

 _Feathertail!_

She was going to save him, free him from this torture!

At least, that's what he thought.

The sleek gray tabby stood just tail-lengths away, watching in silence. They locked eyes for only a moment. Yet, in that moment, Rainkit's heart lurched in his chest. Wasn't she going to help him? Feathertail remained unflinching, as though she were waiting for something beyond her control. Eyes moving back to the tom against his will, Rainkit wished for death. The tomcat appeared unfazed, and bloodlust, and rage, and insanity clouded his eyes.

At last he tore away, snarling, peeling away from him and leaving him a beaten and bloodied lump on the ground. The very next heartbeat, Feathertail sat beside him and cradled him gently in her tail. He strained to look up at her and asked a single question. "Why?"

She purred and touched her nose to his ear, "Find the ones who can save you."

She had responded but not to his question nor to his fear. "Feathertail, I'm scared! What do you mean!" he wailed.

The graceful she-cat did not reply. She stood, tail whisking behind her, and walked away.

Then it disappeared. The blood, the pain, the tom and his rage. All of it, gone. And the brown tabby kit, terrified of it all, lay trembling in the snow. His eyes screwed shut by fear, he drifted into sleep. . .

"Rainkit, wake up!"

He felt himself being shaken, lifted from his dreams by a voice that came to him out of the darkness.

Rainkit blinked awake. Sitting up, he paused for breath and tried to forget what he had seen. The others gathered around him as they battered him with questions. He did not answer them. What use would telling them be? They would not care. They would more than likely dismiss it. The tabby moved away from them, feeling their burning looks, full of worry and confusion, bore into his back as he went. He found a mound of snow and sat beside it, where he stayed for a time in silence. Sunlight streamed through the clouds in broken shards and floated lazily down to the clearing. Watching as Sedgewing and Foxear made her way to him, Rainkit twitched his whiskers. _They're probably coming over to check on me, right?_

His thoughts were answered as they sat beside him. Sedgewing's face looked tired, as if she'd not slept for some time. She curled her tail neatly around her paws and waited. Only after several long moments did she speak, telling him about how she learned of his collapsing in the snow.

"It was nothing," he lied when she'd asked what happened.

She tilted her head at him, "Are you sure? Your denmates were panicked when they came to tell me what happened."

Rainkit lifted his muzzle to the sky, drawing in a breath of icy air. "I am," he murmured. _Feathertail, why do I keep seeing these things? What's wrong with me?_ Only silence was there to answer him. More alone than he had ever felt before, Rainkit curled up, lightly closing his eyes. He did not stir when Sedgewing relayed that he could rejoin the other kits in their play.

He heard Foxear sigh. "Why don't we go see if any patrols have returned?" she offered. Rainkit nodded and rose to his paws. While following the she-cats across the snow-laden camp, Rainkit thought back hazily to his vision. Who was the cat he saw? Why did he seem so angry? What had he been saying to him? Soon, they had stopped in front of Rabbitfur.

The light brown tom glanced at Sedgewing, Rainkit, and Foxear in turn. "What can I help you with?"

Sedgewing flicked an ear, "Have any of the patrols returned yet?"

Rabbitfur nodded, "They have. Some of the warriors have gone back to their den."

Foxear shuffled her paws, and Rainkit began to wonder why she looked so tense. "Was Antfoot with them?" the queen asked.

"No." The deputy drew a paw over his muzzle. "From what I was told, he decided to stay and see if he could find anything more. I went out with Stormfang and Mistclaw earlier to see if we could find him. He didn't turn up. With any luck, he'll be back in camp by tomorrow."

Foxear nodded and nosed Rainkit towards the fresh-kill pile, padding along behind him. He went without question, preoccupied with thoughts of his father.

"Antfoot'll come back soon; right, Foxear?"

She nodded, but it did not reassure him. He wanted to believe her. It would have calmed him, even. But he did not. In place of speaking his mind, he remained quiet, choosing instead to marvel at the size of the squirrel she had taken. It had a gray-brown tinge in its fur. Covered with snow and ice, it did not move nor react as the queen grasped it in her jaws. It was undeniably dead. His eyes moved immediately to its tail. _How could it have walked with such a large thing like that to carry around?_ He followed the line of its body as he walked at his mother's side. Though it looked quite different than others he was used to seeing—gray and heavily furred, with small, tough paws and a large and incredibly thick, curving tail—it still was a squirrel. Foxear swung her head around to look at him, the odd gray squirrel lurching wildly as she did. She let an amused purr rumble in her throat and continued without pause.

The ginger queen set the squirrel down inside the nursery. "I didn't know you admired fresh-kill so much, Rainkit!" she said with a laugh. Fernpelt looked up from where she sat in her nest, the remaining kits playing not too far from her paws.

"What's that?"

"Oh, nothing." Foxear glanced at her son, her eyes twinkling with laughter, and pushed the squirrel towards the center of the den. Rushkit and Scorchkit fell upon it ravenously, eyes and bellies hungry. Rainkit knew this would happen—he saw its blood as it smeared their muzzles—yet still he backed away. Foxear must have noticed, urging him then to eat. He shook his head and backed away from the lump of fur, stricken by fear. Remembering his dream from nights before, he sank to the ground. His heart thudded wildly in his chest and his paws began to itch.

Rainkit brushed his tail on the ground. "I don't feel hungry anymore." He moved slowly back to his mother's nest and sat quietly. The kit buried his face in the tangle of gorse, and grasses, and feathers as he tried to shake the image of the shredded carcass from his mind. Something within him told him that this—the mutilated body of the fat, gray animal not a tail-length from his nose—was the least of his worries. . .

It had taken him a long time to surrender to sleep, but something had woken him. The kit's eyes gleamed within the pitch darkness. The claw-moon that lay in the sky offered him no relief, barely visible, all but completely hidden by clouds. Rain disquieted the night. Heavy, and relentless, and cold, it showered the camp. The snow, as well, had returned. This time, it did not hold that same fascination for him. Dirt quickly turned to mud as the torrent continued and the sky grew darker. The snow that had gathered that day turned gray. Now water-logged, it spread across the clearing.

Rankit's whiskers quivered as a rush of frigid air entered the den. A shadow alighted outside, just barely visible.

What he saw confused him.

 _A bird!_ What was such a small bird doing so close to the nursery? It had no reason, especially in this weather. So why; why come?

Initially, Rainkit did not believe his eyes. Perhaps he dreamed this. Perhaps, by chance, he had eaten a bad piece of prey that morning and this _bird_ was just a feverish dream. He closed his eyes and hoped to wake. After some time, he reopened them and still found it there in front of him. Willing it silently to leave, he curled up against his mother's side and hoped it would obey. . .

A light tapping on Rainkit's shoulder startled him from his dreams of the endless skies, and clouds, and enormous soaring birds whose screeching rattled his bones. One eye opened with the hope of dawn, his heart sank when saw nothing but darkness. Grumbling, he buried his nose under his tail again and went back to sleep.

Again, the feeling of being prodded came to him. He woke, rose to a sitting position, and glanced around the den, his heart beginning to thud in his chest.

Immediately he stopped. He saw the same bird from before standing in front of him with a keen look in its eyes.

 _What does it want from me!_ _It's just a stupid sparrow. I could probably kill it right now and put it on the fresh-kill pile for the morning._ But he stopped himself, hesitating as he watched it move quietly back towards the entrance. It's tawny feathers caught his eye as it turned back to him. Did it want him to follow? Rainkit turned back to his denmates. They slept soundly, pressed against one another within their nests, unaware of the storm that rushed down around them. With a low sigh, Rainkit left them and followed the hallucination outside. _  
_

His feathered guide sat beside the exit to camp and watched the kit as he meandered over to it.

For several moments, it sat there, looking him over as if it wanted to make sure he would be prepared to accompany it.

Then it set off onto the moors.

The small brown sparrow did not spread its wings, instead walking calmly in front of him.

Now and then Rainkit looked around, taking in what little he could see of the territory he called home.

Rough grasses covered the landscape, cleaved by trails worn down by the passing of paws. Mounds of dirty gray snow sprung up around him here and there like small hills. Up above, the sky was dark: dull and cloud-ridden, rain pouring down onto the earth. Underpaw, the path had slicked with sticking mud that clung to his legs and sucked heavily at his paws.

Ahead of Rainkit, the sparrow had stopped.

 _Is that it? Did I follow this piece of crowfood out here just to get lost!_ His thoughts were dashed away when he saw it continue onward.

As they moved, the storm grew harsher. More violent. More unforgiving. The hilly terrain became exhausting to navigate. Rainkit's body was soaked completely now. His wet and matted fur clung to his sides. A freezing cold tore at his muscles, making harder and harder for him to even consider the task of moving as time went on.

His body was giving up; he was sure of that now. But with woodland coming closer, he did not give up hope that he would be safe from the weather in due time.

He stood just beyond the dense line of trees.

A thick layer of snow smothered the branches of the tallest among them.

Rainkit watched, perplexed, as the fragile little bird made its way to a large mound of snow just beneath the trees. It pecked at the pile, then looked back at him before pecking the snow some more.

On and on this went for some time, until Rainkit began to grow increasingly frustrated. "Stop it already! For StarClan's sake, stop!" he growled at the creature.

It turned to him, beat its wings against the chill air, and set itself down in front of him. It leaned forward and lightly touched one of his paws with its beak. Then it moved away and looked back at the snow pile.

Hesitantly, the kit moved up to the snow mound. His paws tread lightly as though he were trying to sneak up on one of his denmates.

The large mound lay at his paws now.

Rainkit dug into it until he hit something. It was hard, yet he'd felt something else—fur. Growing more and more nervous, he dug faster and faster until he revealed only part of what lay underneath.

He saw a nose. Then a mouth. Then a pair of amber eyes, opened wide, shocked, pained, and lifeless.

That's when he stopped.

That's when he backed away, his entire body trembling with sadness and fear.

 _It's not true! It's not true! It's not. . ._

But it was true. Every second of it so indisputably true that Rainkit could not pull himself away from it.

The face beneath the snow stared up at him, the light, the happiness, the warmth gone from its eyes.

The worst part was that he knew him.

* * *

 **Form for OC Submission: (Restriction: Please, no warrior names. I have all the Clans filled.)**

 **Name:**

 **Gender:**

 **Appearance:**

 **Personality:**

 **Thanks for reading guys! Don't forget to send me your guesses about the chapter title's meanings and fill out the OC form if you want a character in the story.**

 **Have a great morning/night/afternoon.**

 **-Rain**


	11. Led By The Nose

**Hi everyone. I'm back with another chapter! Finally! Life seems to have caught up with me in recent weeks.**

 **If you have been looking for the meanings of the chapters' titles as you've been reading, this one is no different. Although, it's a special one because the idiom it relates to is almost an exact event within the chapter. The other one is for you to discern on your own.**

 **REVIEWS**

 **Blue741776 - You got one of the meanings right. As for the remaining one, here's a hint: what was the weather like?**

 **LightPelt (Guest) - I'm glad you're liking it so far. :D**

 ***Note* I have moved OC submissions to the OCs Needed story on my profile. If you want to submit one, you can find it there. Submissions will be closing in three days.  
**

 **Anyway, here's the chapter!**

* * *

 **Chapter Ten: Led By The Nose**

Rainkit couldn't shake the tears away.

Sadness, like the cold rain that poured down around him, came without end. "He's not dead! Antfoot is probably returning to camp right now! I'm just dreaming! He's not dead!" he wailed to the sky, coughing as rainwater fell down into his open mouth. "He's not dead," he repeated in a whisper to himself as his body shook as violently as the raging storm around him. "He'll wake up any moment now. You'll see. Everything. . . everything will be all right." Maybe if he said it to himself enough, if he could convince himself that it wasn't true. Then maybe he'd realize that this was nothing but a dream, that this sight before his eyes was nothing more than a figment born from his tired mind. But Antfoot was dead. The once strong and noble cat, who defended his Clan tirelessly, who taught him so much about life, lay motionless in the snow. And here he stood trying to deny it.

He gazed once more at the body of his father, through the rain and snow, through his sadness and his grief. Shutting his eyes and whispering one final goodbye, he bolted from the grisly scene, away from the cat who had protected and nurtured him. He headed for the trees in front of him. Perhaps they could shelter him from the darkness that seemed to now consume his life.

The dark, twisted trees surrounded him on all sides. The smells of this new place confused him. Nothing made sense right then. And somewhere, in the back of his mind, Antfoot was still alive, sleeping soundly in his nest in the warriors' den, while he himself was nowhere within the reach of safety. The large tree trunks crowded his vision like the heavy snow he had witnessed only a day ago. He realized right then that he did not like the snow. In fact, he hated it. It meant only death, loss, and pain.

He wanted the pain to leave him.

He ran, hoping he would escape it all. Maybe if he ran he would find a way to wake up.

His paws pounded furiously against the ground, spraying dark mud and gray snow into the air behind him. Small creatures sat on the ground around him—exhausted, freezing, hopeless, afraid—cowering against the force of the wind and the storm like rabbits against the fury of a starving fox. He passed them by without a thought, just as he did everything else.

The kit's mind melted into a sluggish mass. Cold and tired, he could not bring himself to move any longer. So he stopped. His weakened legs shuddered under the stress of his weight and the exhaustion that gripped his mind. Rainkit looked for a place to shelter himself, any place that could suffice: the underside of a tree, a small burrow in the ground, a dip in the terrain, anywhere that would keep him safe. Rainkit found himself continuing towards something in the distance.

For the first time since entering this shrouded world, he noticed that the sparrow he followed did not walk beside him. Oddly, this unnerved him. But he knew that it did not matter at that time how he felt. _Only_ his safety mattered.

The point he headed for, a rather large beech tree, came into focus now. The hollowed opening in the tree looked as though it had lain fallow for some time. _It definitely isn't the best thing, but it's all I've got._ He came to it and ducked inside.

It smelled atrocious. The inside of the tree had rotted. The walls lay covered in dark, fetid moss. Cobwebs hung in crevices and pits in the tree, some with small black spiders hanging from the spindles, others without. _Of all the places to shelter, I just_ had _to choose this one. . . Well, it's certainly better than nothing._ Disgusted yet accepting of the place, he huddled deep into the leaves and closed his eyes. But he could not find it within him to surrender to exhaustion. He began to think of his father again, and once more sadness engulfed his thoughts.

 _He. . . I. . . It's not real! I'm imagining this. I'm just dreaming, that's all!_ The tabby kit's hackles rose as he began to grow maddened by his thoughts. _Why can't I just wake up? This is all just a stupid dream!_ His body rattled as choking sobs escaped his throat, and he lashed out furiously at his shelter, scoring the wood with shallow claw marks. _Wake up!_ _Wake up!_ _Wake up!_

The truth was that he was awake. This was not a dream. Only to guard himself from this realization did he believe it to be so.

 _I-I'll see Antfoot tomorrow; I'm sure of it. Nothing will have changed. He and Foxear will probably scold me for being out in weather like this, for being away from them for so long._ A heavy, shuddering bout of sadness clawed Rainkit as he realized the truth he had tried so hard to keep hidden from himself. _I shouldn't have left. I shouldn't have been so_ feather-brained _as to follow that bird. . .  
_

 _He's not coming back._ Sadness rattled the kit's body like the wind rattled the trees around him.

 _Antfoot's_ _—_ He curled himself up within the leaves knowing what he had been about to say.

At that moment, the protective wall that had formed within his mind began to crumble and wither away into dust. He couldn't bear it any longer and let his grief overtake him as each thought spun into the growing web that began to form deep within him. It spread through him until the only thought he could think was that of his father in the snow.

His vision blurred as tears formed within his eyes. Blinking them away did not help, and so he lay there, curled up deep down in his nest of decaying leaves as sadness fell upon him and his mind faded away.

* * *

"Hey, are you okay?" whispered a voice within the darkness.

Another voice sounded not long after. "Should we be doing this, Flame—"

Rainkit began to wonder if he lie within a dream.

"Sparrowpaw, It doesn't matter what Oakstar will think right now. Don't you think _this_ is more important? It's one of WindClan's kits, for StarClan's sake!"

"Yes, but—"

"But nothing. I thought by now you would have come to realize that not everything is always going to work out as planned. Oakstar's word isn't the word of StarClan."

Rainkit grew sure now that he was not dreaming this. If he were dreaming, he would have been able to see right then. He did not recognize the names he heard. Uncertainty remained the only thing that kept his eyes closed.

He felt himself lifted from the ground, moving towards some unknown place. He did not recognize the scent of these cats—a mix of leaves, wet grass, and moss. Slowly he began to panic as the the thought entered his mind that these cats were stealing him away from his family. It was then that he awoke, eyes bright with fear.

"Where are you taking me?" he mewed feebly.

"Somewhere you'll be safe," a light brown tom replied gently.

"Who are you? Where are we? Where's my family?"

"Slow down, kit. One question at a time. There's nothing for you to worry about. We're here to help you, not hurt you," meowed a white she-cat. She watched him for only a moment, but in that moment Rainkit could see a sort of hazy whiteness in one of her eyes. Almost immediately was he reminded of Heronflight, the RiverClan warrior with a missing eye. He racked his brain for why the she-cat's eye looked that way but could not come up with an answer.

"What's wrong with your eye?" he blurted, silently scolding himself afterwards when he saw her flinch. _Mousedung!_ "I didn't mean to—"

The cat purred, "Nonsense. I'm blind in it is all. It doesn't bother me much anymore to be asked about it, either. I just hadn't expected you to ask so suddenly. Most of the kits in ThunderClan have asked at one point. My name's Snoweye." She chuckled before continuing. "The cat holding you is Flamepelt, and the light brown tom walking on the right of you is her apprentice, Sparrowpaw. As for where we are right now, we're in ThunderClan territory. You're family, I'm sure, are back in WindClan waiting for you."

"Not everyone." Rainkit felt the memory returning to him, stronger than he'd imagined. _Why can't I just. . . forget?_

Snoweye glanced at him quizzically before whispering something to Flamepelt. She then looked back to him with a somber expression on her face. "The dawn patrol found a body just inside our territory. One of ThunderClan's warriors, Thorntail, identified it as that of Antfoot. We're— I'm sure that if you ask him about what he saw, he'll tell you. Would you like me to point him out to you when we get to the camp?"

The kit nodded, "I would."

"I'll direct you to him then."

Rainkit watched the ground as it flew by beneath his paws, deciding to change the subject. "Will I get to go back to WindClan soon?"

"Of course you will!" the tom, Sparrowpaw, replied cheerily from beside his mentor. "What made you think that you wouldn't?" He fell silent a moment later, a grunt from Flamepelt quieting him.

"You will," Snoweye continued, "once we inform Oakstar of your arrival and a patrol is sent out to pass the news onto your Clan. You may have to stay with us for the remainder of the day. Or more, depending on how long it takes your Clan to send someone." The warrior paused. She had moved her eyes away towards something ahead of them. "Looks like we're here."

Where exactly was _here?_ Rainkit couldn't see anything except a swath of brambles in their path. Only when they had passed this did he see what she meant. A deep stone hollow lay nestled there in the ground. They soon passed through a long tunnel rimmed with jagged, scrapping thorns and emerged onto a narrow path which circled the hollow. Stones clattered along down along the path as they moved, small showers of dirt breaking free from the face of the rock and falling towards them.

As the group reached the base of the hollow, not a thing stirred. All eyes, it seemed, rested unendingly on the newcomer. Passing the onlookers without a word, the cats headed for a cave within the rock screened completely by by bramble tendrils. Here, Flamepelt—his silent carrier—set him down and moved around him before beckoning for him to follow inside. He did so hesitantly, coming to a stop in front of muscular-looking brown tabby tom.

At first Rainkit did not know how to react in the presence of the tom. He stood there with a look of pure confusion on his face.

The blueish green-eyed tomcat smiled and introduced himself as Oakstar, ThunderClan's leader. "You're Rainkit. Foxear's kit, yes?"

Rainkit was shocked. "H-How do you know so much about me? I've never seen you before in my life."

"Let's just say I've heard quite a bit about you at past Gatherings." The leader ended there and moved on to the topic of the kit's arrival. "What brought you to ThunderClan, Rainkit?"

 _Flamepelt,_ he wanted to say. "I sort of. . . sneaked out last night during the storm last night," he replied instead.

A new voice came to question him, one which he had not heard until just then. The kit turned to face a ginger she-cat, who he knew right then was Flamepelt. "Why in StarClan's name would you do something like that?"

"Flamepelt, it's not the time for this," Oakstar put in. Flamepelt grumbled quietly to herself but said no more. "If you'd excuse me, I need to go organize a patrol to relay the news. Sparrowpaw, take Rainkit to the nursery, would you? Flamepelt, follow me. You'll be on the patrol to the border later today." He exited the den, Snoweye and Flamepelt following closely behind.

Sparrowpaw ushered Rainkit out into the open towards a thick bramble bush protected by a web of snaking roots woven among the branches. "How old are you, Rainkit?" the apprentice inquired as they walked.

Rainkit smiled, "A little over four moons."

"Are you looking forward to becoming an apprentice?"

"Yeah. It feels so far away though."

Sparrowpaw purred and flicked his tail over the kit's ears. "Time goes by faster than you'd believe. You don't have long to wait, I assure you."

Off to his left, Rainkit could see Oakstar speaking to a group of warriors, Flamepelt among them. Curious, he stopped to listen.

"I know _where_ he came from, Whiskerclaw, but that is none of our concern. He is _WindClan's_ responsibility, not ours. Let them—"

Rainkit felt a nudge on his side and saw Sparrowpaw gazing calmly at him. "Let's get going," the apprentice meowed. "You don't need to see that. Oakstar's just organizing the patrol."

"But what was he saying about me? Why did he say, 'I know where he came from'?"

"Don't worry yourself over that, Rainkit. I-I-It's not that important," Sparrowpaw meowed shakily. Guided towards the den he believed to be the nursery, Rainkit found himself surrounded by a familiar yet distinctly strange scent. Sparrowpaw moved around him and stopped in front of a dark brown queen with splotches of black on her fur. "Mudtail," he asked, "Can you watch our guest for a little while? Flamepelt asked me to change the elder's bedding this morning, and I still haven't gotten to it."

Rainkit then watched Sparrowpaw depart heartbeats later, after it looked as though they'd agreed on something. He stood across from the queen, Mudtail, until she beckoned him over to her with a sweep of her tail. He strode over to her quietly, on edge and tense.

"Hi, my name's Spiderkit! What's yours?" asked a gray tom-kit from beside Mudtail.

"My name's Rainkit. I'm from WindClan. Why are you called 'Spiderkit'?"

The gray kit smiled at Rainkit then. Nothing threatening or angry, just kind and openly welcoming. As he did this, Rainkit could see something different about him. On the right side of his mouth lay an third, smaller canine tooth. _Oh._ "It's not that big of a deal to me," Spiderkit meowed after a moment. "Some of the other kits have teased me about it in the past, saying that I wasn't normal, but Mudtail always said that it made me unique."

Another queen—a long furred golden she-cat with a bulging belly—rose to her paws and walked over to them, her belly swaying from side to side as she moved. The queen sat and looked at the two kits with a smile on her face. "Spiderkit's right, in a way. There—"

"What are you going on about now, Dawnfeather? Can't you see that my kits and I are trying to sleep?" a white she-cat asked in one corner of the den before huffing and turning away from the rest of the den.

"I very well can, Swiftfoot. As I was saying, there really isn't such a thing as normal. Every cat has their differences, Rainkit. You just have to learn what yours are and embrace them."

Rainkit brushed his tail along the ground behind him, "I'll try to, Dawnfeather."

"Good. I hope that— Yes, Snoweye?"

The white-eyed she-cat stood at the entrance, her gaze traveling slowly throughout the den. "I came to fetch Rainkit. I said I'd take him to talk to Thorntail about. . ." Dawnfeather nodded and soon after, Rainkit followed Snoweye out into the enclosed clearing, leading him towards the tangled branches of a fallen beech tree. When the pair had reached the tree, Snoweye motioned for Rainkit to stop before ducking inside. Several seconds later she appeared again to him and told him he could go inside.

A short-furred tomcat with a bushy tail greeted him inside the den. Around him were others who did not seem to care that he were there. "My name's Thorntail. Snoweye mentioned that you wanted to speak with me about the cat me and my patrol found last night. Is that correct?"

Rainkit nodded, relieved to feel his pounding heart beginning to slow. "Yes. What do you know about what happened to my father?"

Thorntail repositioned himself within his nest before he spoke. "We didn't expect to find him the way we had. He had several gashes along his sides and chest, and his fur felt as cold as ice. His body was just inside our border. At first we assumed that he had tried to hunt on our territory, only to be attacked and killed by some predator. But then we started to think of something else entirely. The gashes were too small, too precise to be made by anything but a cat. We believe he had been murdered, Rainkit."

"That— That's not possible! Who would. . .?" Rainkit sank to the ground and screwed his eyes closed, turning away from the cats with the den. He felt a paw nudge him gently.

"I don't want to talk to you anymore, Thorntail."

"Perhaps you'd rather listen," a new voice meowed.

Rainkit did not bother to see who had spoken, too shaken by what Thorntail had said to do anything but sit there.

"Have you considered the possibility that Antfoot and Foxtail are not your parents, Rainkit?" the cat asked calmly.

 _What! He must be joking. They're my parents! I'm sure of that._ The kit opened his eyes and rounded on those in the den, not caring who he addressed. "How could you expect me to believe a bold-faced lie like that!" he snarled bitterly. "What proof do you have that I'm not their kit?"

The cat who had spoken, a ginger tom with sky blue eyes, eyed him consideringly, "You do not like like either of them in the least possible way. Your fur is neither a combination of theirs nor completely one of theirs. It's brown. . . I asked Antfoot some time ago about his mate, Foxear, at a Gathering. When he pointed her out to me then and told me about you, I knew that there was no way that you could be their son."

Rainkit gazed around the den, steadily growing more and more shocked as he noticed that no one seemed to question or argue with the ginger tom's statements. "You're lying," he hissed through gritted teeth. "It's not true. None of it is!" But an inkling of doubt wormed its way into his thoughts right then, telling him that the tom could _actually_ be right.

Bolting from the den, he raced back towards the den Sparrowpaw had first led him to. He spoke to no one, preferring to sink down into one of the nests and close his eyes to the world. To life itself. . .

"Rainkit, wake up. Time to get you back to your Clan," Flamepelt meowed, prodding him gently with a paw.

Opening an eye, Rainkit sat himself up and shook out his fur before following the she-cat outside to where he had come into the hollow the day before, where a small group of cats had gathered. "Is everyone ready to go?"

They nodded, and soon, with Rainkit perched on Flamepelt's back, the cats set out in the direction of the WindClan border.

Silence moved around the cats like fog as they trekked. No cat dared speak, nor question why they were undertaking the task. After several minutes the patrol had reached the border.

Rainkit's nose twitched and his ears stood on alert as he detected the familiar sounds and scents of his home. Yet something else reached him, something he did not expect: the scent of his mother. _Foxear!_ Flamepelt stopped and allowed the kit to clamber down off her back.

Racing to Foxear, Rainkit barreled into her protective embrace. Foxear covered his head and ears with comforting licks. "Everything's all right, love. Everything's all right."

Unable to control the words the spilled from his mouth, Rainkit told her everything that Thorntail had said to him: how he and a ThunderClan patrol had found Antfoot, how they suspected him of stealing prey, how they believed him murdered by some cat.

Surprisingly, Foxear did not appear to be taken aback by any of this. _Did she find out this morning?_ "Did he say anything else to you when you talked to him?" Foxear asked curiously.

Rainkit nodded, his voice becoming barely more than a whisper.

"H-He said that you and Antfoot aren't my real parents!"

* * *

 **That's all for now, guys.**

 **QOTD: What's the most recent fun thing that you've done?**

 **Bye for now,**

 **Rain**


	12. Overcome

**Hi everyone!**

 **Sorry that this story has gone without an update for a while. I was away at a college camp for a week near the tail end of July and did not have any access to internet other than what we were required to use it for at the time. Again, sorry for the delay.**

 **Enjoy the chapter!**

* * *

 **Chapter Eleven: Overcome**

Time became an enemy to him. Fate had cast a shadow over his life. For one moon since returning, he did not speak nor move from the nursery, leaving only to eat. Shutting down was all he thought to do to hide from his grief. Every night, he would lie awake, expectant of his father's return. Every night, he would be called from his watch without finding fulfillment or joy, only the fitfulness of sleep awaiting him. His mother grew worried as nights turned to days, and days turned to nights without a visible change within her kit. He seemed almost dead inside, as if nothing mattered to him anymore. Each day is a new beginning, he began to tell himself.

Each day is a new beginning. . .

"Rainkit, is something the matter? You haven't been yourself since we got back." Foxear said, giving him a gentle nudge.

"No."

She prodded him again. "There is; don't lie."

"Okay," he relented; "I. . . I just really miss Antfoot. He didn't deserve what happened to him. I'd do anything to see him again! I-I won't disobey you! I won't think about sneaking out anymore! I won't bother anyone! I just want to see him again!" Curling down deeper into the nest, he turned from her and hoped that she would not approach him again. He felt her settle down beside him, her tail wrapping around him protectively.

"You will see him again some day. For now, all you can do is live your life. Nothing more, nothing less."

Knowing that continuing in this way would get him nowhere, Rainkit stood and exited the nursery, Foxear following close behind, the sun hanging high in the sky. Soon he saw his friends and brother playing near the apprentices' den and headed over to them. Scorchkit stopped when he saw Rainkit and smiled welcomingly, "Do you want to join us Rainkit? We're playing 'Clans'."

Rainkit shook his head, "I think I'll watch."

"Okay then." he replied, before leaping at Rushkit.

Smiling as he watched them, Rainkit did not notice that Silentkit had come up to him until she tapped him on the shoulder. Her eyes were full of worry as she looked at him. " _Rainkit, are you okay? You haven't been outside for a while now."_

"I don't want to talk about it."

 _"But—"_

"I _don't_ want to talk about it," he repeated.

The she-kit looked at him with anger in her eyes. " _When did you start to push your friends away, Rainkit?"_

"I don't know what you're talking about." _  
_

 _"Don't give me that. You're not stupid, Rainkit. Use your head and think."_

Silentkit did not allow him time to reply, returning to play with Rushkit and Scorchkit. Rainkit sighed as he watched her walk away. He knew she had a point. The tom-kit had started to shut himself out from those he cared about. Perhaps if he focused more on the present instead of the past, joy would find him once again.

 _How would Antfoot want me to feel?_

The question tugged at his mind in the same way the thought of food did a famished stomach. How would the tomcat have wanted him to feel right then? Certainly anger and guilt were not the answer, nor was grief. What remained then? Slowly did a small light of realization begin to brighten in Rainkit's mind as he reached the conclusion that Antfoot would wish for him to be happy, in every moment of his life. The kit had no use for his sadness anymore, no use for the emptiness that came each and every time he said, 'I want to see him again, just one more time.'

Right then, Rainkit vowed that he would do his best to make his father proud and enjoy the time he had in that place.

His friends had long since disbanded, now scattered about the camp, doing as they wished.

Rabbitfur's voice drifted from beside the Tallrock. "Mosswhisker, have you and the rest of your patrol driven off that fox seen near the border a few days ago?"

"We have. We won't have to worry about it anymore."

The deputy purred. "Good. You're free to go about your day; that was all I needed to hear."

Rainkit turned from them with a purr in his throat. _It's good to hear that the Clan won't have to worry about being attacked._ He stopped for a heartbeat when he noticed Larkeye and Stonefur sharing a rabbit some distance away from him but continued on the next second with a smile on his face. Larkeye had always appeared shy around the she-cat, so, while somewhat confused, Rainkit felt happy for him. Yet despite this brief happiness, the nagging sense of guilt found its way to his thoughts once more. Feeling now nothing more than emptiness and regret, Rainkit left them and headed on towards the nursery. _  
_

Even its warmth and comfort, which had once drifted around him with the gentleness of a calm breeze, was gone. Slowly making his way to his family's nest, he found himself growing more and more ashamed of how he had acted. Foxear and Fernpelt both asleep, he lay alone with his thoughts, his regrets, and a single and confounding question.

 _Am I not their kit?_

With a gentle prod on his mother's side, he hoped to wake her. The queen opened one eye a minute later, turning to her son slowly, bogged down by the weight of bleariness and sleep. "Wh-What is it Rainkit? Why'd you wake me?" she asked with yawn.

He glanced down at his paws before replying, "I wanted to ask you something." Foxear's eyes lit up with anticipation as she quietly waited for his question.

"Was everything that ThunderClan cat true? Are you and Antfoot not my parents?"

Foxear flinched. "Rainkit, you know that we've been over this before. Antfoot and I both love you more than you can imagine. We always will, no matter what may happen. I don't believe you should continue to worry yourself about this, dear."

Frustrated now, the kit eyed her coldly. "Why won't you answer the question? Are you, or are you not my parents?"

"N-No Rainkit, Antfoot and I were never your parents." Her voice turned to something barely more than a whisper as a tide of emotion took hold over her in that moment. "We never wanted you to find out; we just wished for you to be happy."

"And you believed that lying to me would do that? How long were you planning on keeping this from me, my entire life! Did you even consider— Did you even consider my feelings!" He hissed then, his eyes cold and narrowed. "What made you think that I would be okay with this? You allowed me to live my entire life up to now believing a lie! You're no better than a fox!"

"Rainkit, please, let me explain." broke from Foxear.

"Why? So that you can lie to me again! You both thought I was a mistake, right?. Maybe that's why you did it, maybe that's why you decided to conceal the truth from me. Am I a mistake to you? Is that why you've been lying to me all this time! Am I so much a mistake that you wished I'd never been born, _mother?_ On second thought, I'm not even sure I should call you that anymore. . . Thorntail was right all along! I'm not your kit, I look nothing like either of you: you or Antfoot. Funny how some cat from a Clan I've been told is an _enemy_ could be more _trustworthy_ than the cat who is _supposed_ to deserving more than anything of my trust.

Perhaps I should run off to join them. I'm sure I wouldn't have to worry about any of _those_ cats _lying_ to me. Would you like me to do that, Foxear? You wouldn't regret it if I did, right?"

Visibly now, did the queen quake from grief. No longer could she hold herself together. Her resolve, her emotion, her strength dwindled into nothingness as she took in all that came from the little kit that she loved: a cat she would always believe to be her son.

"I would. Every second of it, I would hate. Never once did I say or think any of what you had asked. You _are not_ living a lie. You _are not_ a mistake. You _are_ living your life just as StarClan wanted you to, for better or for worse. And most importantly, despite the truth, and no matter what happens, you _are_ our son!"

Murmurings and whispers emanated from the clearing, spurred on by the commotion from within the den. A crowd had formed just outside, intent upon discerning for themselves, individually, what had occurred to piqued their curiosity. None appeared willing to enter the place for fear of causing yet even more trouble. A dark gray she-cat milled through the crowd until she found herself at the head. Despite the urgings of the others about her, she seemed insistent on investigating what had occurred within the den, moving ever closer until she could see faintly inside. The dark gray shape of her head entered into the dim light of the den, her eyes searching, widened by nervousness, for the source of the commotion that caused the clamorous gathering of the crowd.

"Is everything all right?" she inquired, knowing full well that this was not the case. Rainkit eyed her with suspicion, his hackles raised in defiant anger, believing she too would deceive him in the same way that the cat before her had done. The cat took another look throughout the space, appearing to grow more nervous and apprehensive with each moment she remained without an answer. She did receive one, not in word nor sound, but in gesture alone. A look said nothing and, in the same heartbeat, conveyed everything that needed to be. Leaving then, the she-cat arrived all but a moment later with yet another, more discerning observer. Foxear stood and exited along with them, telling the small kit that sat across from her moment before to remain, who, despite his hisses and snarls, did.

To him it appeared that the length of their conversation stretched endlessly as he waited there in the silence of that space, hearing only the hushed chattering of the cats who descended upon it with little but oblivious, interested curiosity to guide their actions. _They're talking about me aren't they?_ He hissed as the thought came; it angered him even more to think it. _They don't know_ anything _about what happened. They don't understand how I'm feeling. They're all a bunch of featherbrains!_ The moss nest beneath his feet suddenly felt brittle, stiff and unwelcoming. He tore at it furiously, maddened, still, by the learning of a truth which he himself had asked to know For that small time between its wholeness and its separation, the moss that lay shredded at his claws captured all of his focus, attention, and anger. But it lay shattered now, shattered in the same horrible, disfiguring way that every other thing he had ever known had been not minutes ago.

The trio appeared again to him after sometime, each looking calmer than they had previously. The front of the group—the WindClan leader, Willowstar—addressed the kit calmly, as if learning of what took place had not discomforted her in anyway. She drew her tail around her and sat, only a few tail-lengths away in front of him, before speaking. "Rainkit, we understand how you must be feeling. _All_ of us do—"

He did not give a moment's pause to consider this, gritting his teeth and hissing; "Do you? Do you really _understand_ how it feels to be lied to every day of your life?"

The leader drew a paw over her muzzle before responding. "Well no, but—"

"But what?" Rainkit hissed now, with his ears flattened back and his tail whipping aggressively behind him.

" _But_ we _do_ know what it feels like to be lied to. And do you know what all of us have gained from those experiences? We gained a strength we never would have gotten without them. We learned to leave the past behind us." She pointed with her tail to herself and then the cats beside her. "I have. Foxear has. Stonefur here has too. Every cat in every Clan has, or will, learn this. If you dwell too long in the past, you forget the present and cannot look forward to the future. The Clans live on by accepting the past, by accepting that the loss and hardships they faced seasons upon seasons ago _did_ happen, and moving on. What you have learned here today will not end your world. . .

It will only begin it." Willowstar stepped away from Rainkit, leaving him grumbling where he say about he refused to believe her. Stonefur, the kit saw, moved beside Willowstar and whispered hurriedly into her ear, recieving a nod in response. Moving back to Rainkit, Willowstar sat down opposite him, gaining a disgruntled sigh as she did.

"What?" he asked without looking up.

"Stonefur went to fetch Sedgewing, see if you could be given anything for shock."

"I'm not 'in shock'; I feel fine."

Willowstar only nodded. "Physically, I'm sure." This earned only a puzzled look from the kit.

Leading him from the nursery to the medicine den a few minutes later, Willowstar and Foxear walked in front and behind him silently the short distance there. The medicine cat, who looked herself in need of herbs when Rainkit spotted her, was bewildered to have recounted to her what occurred during her time away on the moor gathering herbs. Setting what she had collected down beside a crevice in the rock, Sedgewing looked to the group for half a heartbeat, turning back and reemerging with several stems of a small green plant clasped in her jaws. Placing them down at her paws, the she-cat stripped the leaves from one of the stems and set several in front of Rainkit. All the while, the tom-kit watched in a confused, yet slightly agitated expression. _I don't want Sedgewing's help. She's going to trick me just like Foxear and Willowstar had._ At this, he made to leave, blocked by the bodies of Willowstar and Stonefur from reaching the escape he desired.

"Rainkit, she's only trying to help you," Foxear mewed softly in an attempt to persuade him to turn back to the den. He did so hesitantly, glancing with apprehension at the herb leaves on the ground and the WindClan medicine cat several times before finally giving up his resistance. The herb set before him did not appear something he wished to eat. With their odd green color, the leaves of the herb Sedgewing had revealed—he could not be bothered to produce its name—gave Rainkit a unnerving and queasy feeling in his belly. He pawed at one, as though to test it, recoiling at the sticky texture of its surface. Again he went to it, this time licking it, which yielded the same effect. Once unbothered by the strange texture of the single leaf, he proceeded to eat all that had been set before him. Its taste did not fare him any better, with a grimace of disgust and displeasure appearing on his face. Sedgewing, much to his displeasure, looked satisfied with what had occurred, asking him only to return for the night with the purpose of making certain he were all right.

Shooed from the den along with all the others, Rainkit gave pause to look back and see the WindClan medicine cat busily sorting through her recent collections from the moor. This scene did not hold his focus for long as the sound of his denmates' voices came from beside the nursery. He turned in their direction, and spotted them at its entrance, none too pleased to see him. Momentarily he fought against going to them but knew that leaving them in that way would cause him more trouble than he felt prepared to deal with. Heart pounding heavily in his chest, Rainkit reached his denmates with slow and nervous steps. Rushkit spoke first, offering a angered albeit restrained growl before he began. "What in StarClan's name did you do, Rainkit!" he demanded hotly. "And don't say, 'I don't know what you're talking about'. _Why_ did nearly _half_ the Clan crowd around the nursery? The three of us"—he gestured to himself, Scorchkit, and Silentkit—"were playing with Molepaw and Dustfur when _suddenly,_ Fernpelt and Mosswhisker came over and told us to go see Haretail for a story. When we asked why, neither of them answered. So, again, what did you do?"

Rainkit shook his head and replied simply with, "Nothing", falling silent shortly after. This continued on for some time: the three kits asking questions and him continuing to remain quiet or refusing to answer altogether. Then, he suddenly broke, telling them everything he learned and said, snarling all the while. To his surprise, only Scorchkit looked unperturbed by any of what he said. "You knew?" Rainkit inquired almost instantaneously. A nod followed. He looked to the two others.

Scorchkit, again, answered him. "They're as old as you are. They couldn't have known. I know only because I'm a quarter-moon older than you all."

Rainkit, for the first time, hissed at his "brother". "You've been lying to me too, just like Foxear and everyone else!" Walking away towards the elder Haretail's den, he added, "I never want to speak to _any_ of you again." His fury remained lodged deep in his chest, fueling the growl which began to rise in his throat. A raspy meow from inside the badger set suppressed it.

"I can tell you're angry, Rainkit. I don't need my eyes to see that. How about you come relax for a little while." It was not so much a question as it was a request. Obeying Haretail, Rainkit entered the den and sat across from the elder in one of the den's many long-unoccupied nests. When Rainkit settled himself, Haretail resumed speaking. "Would you like me to tell you a story to take your mind off of things?" Rainkit nodded.

 _Anything to escape this place, even if only for a little while._

Haretail cleared his throat, kneading his paws on his nest. "This is a story about an trip made by six cats chosen from all the Clans called the 'Journey to Midnight'. On this—"

Rainkit's puzzled mew interrupted him. "What do you mean by 'Journey to Midnight'? Midnight is every night. Why would any cat need to _travel_ to find it?"

The blind white tom only smiled. "You'll understand soon. . . Anyway, as I was saying, on this journey, the six chosen cats needed to travel to the sun-drown-place. They met someone who proved to be a great ally of the Clans there: a badger named Midnight." The elder purred then, as if he noticed the shocked, gaping, and awed look on Rainkit's face. "Midnight told them that their home would be destroyed by Twolegs with the creation of a new Thunderpath in their territory. That new home, she said, would be shown by a dying warrior. Two days after the cats left Midnight, they arrived in the mountains. There, they met a group of cats known as the Tribe of Rushing Water. The six cats stayed with them, leaving after one of their group died to a creature known as a sharptooth. The cat's name was Feathertail." Rainkit tensed, a jolt of realization passing through him.

 _Feathertail! That's how she died? But if she died so far away from the Clans, how could I have seen and heard her in my dreams? Wouldn't she be lost, and not in StarClan?_

What Haretail said next answered all of his questions. "She died a hero, killing the sharptooth and saving the Tribe. Because of that, she is free to walk with StarClan, as well the Tribe's ancestors: the Tribe of Endless Hunting."

"Do you think any cat could make that journey? To the mountains, I mean."

Haretail, with a slow and sure jerk of his head, gave his agreement. "I'm sure it's possible. It happened once before, so what's to say it can't—" He paused to clear his throat. "What's to say it can't happen again? Though I pray to StarClan that it never does."

"Why not?"

"Because no one knows what the journey might bring."

But Rainkit had already decided, decided for his own sake that he would make that journey. He stood and thanked Haretail, exiting the den quietly. Outside, he watched as the sun sank down below the horizon, moving further into the sun-drown-place. Its single golden wing spread wide across the growing night sky, sending splashes of red, orange, and gold spiraling down onto the clouds, the last remnants of light in an ever-expanding sea of stars. Turning away from this majesty, Rainkit stood in silent awe of the mountains, which seemed to tug stronger than ever at his bones, urging him forward. Making his way to the medicine den where Sedgewing would be waiting, Rainkit felt sensed a direction for his life which he never had before. Overcome by a new sense of purpose, by the prospect of a journey yet to unfold.

Overcome by hope.

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 **That's the chapter. What did you think?**

 **QOTD: What is your favorite board game. Mine's Monopoly.**

 **See you soon,**

 **Rain**


	13. Jagged Stones and Soft Faces

**Hi again, everyone! Did I ever tell you that you're awesome? Well, you are. Just the fact that you're all reading this has made me happy.**

 **By the way, I'm very sorry that I did not keep to my schedule for this update. I was waiting for this chapter to be beta'd. [My beta for this story is crystal-of-D.A.-11 :D (Thanks, Crystal!)].  
**

 **Also, I plan to put this story on hiatus for a while after this update because of school. I just started the year earlier this week and want to give myself time to get re-acquainted with everything. (Sorry! u-u)  
**

 **Anyway, here's the chapter!**

* * *

 **Chapter Twelve: Jagged Stones and Soft Faces**

The air hung still as the sun crept over the high ridges of the distant mountains beyond the lake. Birds, waking now to a new day, seemed to call out in joy as the vibrant face of the sun greeted them. The rest of the world, peacefully asleep, unaware of the events transpiring around them, lay still, the air broken only by the soft murmurings of dreams. The serenity of it all shattered as the sun continued its rise, the hushed whispers of an excited soul floating blissfully into the sky.

"Silentkit, Rushkit, wake up!" A paw nudged Silentkit's flank, trying to wake her.

A disgruntled murmur from the tomkit beside her answered the eager demand. "Rainkit, no one else is even up yet, except you. For StarClan's sake, just go back to sleep. Please." With a huff, he went back to sleep.

Sighing, Rainkit returned back to the nest he shared with Foxear. Ever since Scorchpaw had been made an apprentice a quarter-moon ago, the small space where he'd slept grew cold and the world, it seemed, just a little bit larger. With rest far from his reach, the kit stayed awake and watched the distant, brightening sky through the gap, thoughts preoccupied by somethings not so far away. His mind seemed, for the first time in a long time, cleared of all uneasiness. Instead of shame and confusion tugging constantly at his belly, he only felt a small, quiet hollow space inside him.

 _Is it all over?_

He was jolted by a wash of fear. He knew there was still so much he didn't know. But this time, no cat in WindClan—or ThunderClan—could answer it for him. _That featherbrained sparrow. . . Feathertail. . . Rock. . . What does it all mean?_

Inquisitiveness pounded in his heart, as his head searched for answers. He sighed, shoulders relaxing.

 _It's been a long time, but I still feel ashamed about what I said and how I acted._ He frowned, his head sinking to the edge of the nest as regret nipped at his mind. _More than anything, they're like family. Despite what I said back then, I couldn't have kept to what I said I'd do; they mean too much to me._ In an attempt to push away the growing feeling of guilt inside himself, Rainkit got out of the nest and began to pace.

"Rainkit, dear, what are you doing up? It's quite early," Foxear murmured sleepily, her head raised to look at him.

Responding to her should have been easy, unconscious even, but the memory of the cat's betrayal halted him. And so he went on pacing the den.

"Rainkit?"

A frustrated sigh left his body. "Let me alone, Foxear. _Please_."

He heard her stand and come up to him, looking down at him with worry in her eyes. "I know how you feel, but to me, you are still my kit." Her tail brushed his back and he stopped, turning to her.

"Stop trying to make up for your mistakes, Foxear. It's never going to change what's happened. It's never going to make me feel any better. It's never going to change what I think of you. Please, just _let me alone_."

The queen winced and backed up a few steps before turning her back to Rainkit, leaving him to stare after her.

"I-If that's what you want Rainkit, then sure, I'll stop bothering you. But I want you to know that I'll always be here for you. Antfoot will too. . . What's been said and done doesn't sway _our_ minds. We'll always love you as one of our kits. Wherever your real mother is, I'm sure she'd be proud to know what a great cat you've become."

 _Would she really? I don't think she'd even recognize me if she saw me._

Only when Foxear smiled and answered him did Rainkit realize he'd voiced his thoughts aloud. "She would, Rainkit. A mother never forgets the life they've brought into this world. . . Blood is an unbreakable bond. Your mothe—no, both of your parents—are proud of you. Even now, so far away."

Pausing for a moment, Rainkit considered what she said. "I guess you have a point." Another pause. "Though it still doesn't fix anything between us," he added with a small growl. Frustration clawed at his belly.

Foxear sighed and curled up again. "I understand that, Rainkit."

"Fine," the kit spat. "Be like that. Be just as unconcerned about me as you always were."

Fernpelt shifted in her nest to look at him, having heard what he said. "Don't say things like that, Rainkit. She cares about you."

The kit opened his mouth to respond to the queen, but it stood agape as a loud yowl broke the air.

"Let all cats old enough to run on the moors gather for a Clan meeting!"

With bright, excited eyes Rainkit looked between Rushkit and Silentkit, who had awoken at the call. "Come on you two, let's go!" he meowed, turning and making for the clearing. A tail barred him from going any further when he stepped outside: Foxear's.

"No one"—she eyed Rainkit as if to make a point—"is going anywhere until you all look presentable." Ushered back beside the nursery, Rainkit sat as Foxear began to groom him. Despite his best efforts to be free of her, she kept him there, fidgeting and all. "Please stop moving, you'll only make me take longer." So he sat there for what felt like an eternity before she finally released him and made her way along behind him and the other kits, groomed as well by their mother, to the Tallrock.

Willowstar stood high above the three kits, her eyes glad and hopeful. Yet Rainkit saw something else in them: a joyous warmth which he did not expect to find. A soft breeze blew by, bringing with it an all too familiar scent, one the kit wished he could have forgotten. The air rushed about his ears, a soft, female voice hidden within, whispering something he could not make sense of. _You will meet her in due time_. More gentle words flowed on the silky tongue. Then it disappeared, leaving him confused and worried. _What did she mean by that?_ Rainkit wondered, his heart hammering inside his chest. _And why does she keep saying that I need to 'prepare for the journey that lies ahead'?_

 _I feel so small and dumb right now!_

The leader's voice broke his thoughts. "Rushkit, you have reached the age of six moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you earn your warrior name—"

The tomkit piped up from where he stood. "Willowstar, it is my wish to train to become a medicine cat."

The leader broke off, surprise flashing on her face. It was rare for a kit to interrupt the leader during their apprentice ceremony. Her tail curled around her paws, as she had clearly not anticipated this news. "Rushkit?"

Rushkit stepped forward defiantly, dipping his head low in respect. "I know I have not discussed this with you, Willowstar, but I firmly believe that that is the path laid out for me."

Willowstar's paws shifted a little bit beneath her. Her eyes widened as she steadied herself, and an amused smile twitched on the tip of her mouth. "I did not expect this. Are you sure this is the right decision?"

An uneasy silence weighed down upon the cats. Rainkit's tail twitched in anticipation. His friend wanted to be a medicine cat? Surprise coursed through him from ear to tail-tip, replaced by a strong desire to protect Rushkit's wish. _Let him, Willowstar!_ he begged inwardly. _Let him do what he wants to do!_

Rushkit finally nodded, taking in a deep breath. "Yes."

Willowstar nodded and turned to Sedgewing, who sat close by outside her den. "Are you willing to mentor him?"

She nodded. "I am."

"Then step forward."

Sedgewing's voice rose into the clearing."Cats of WindClan, as you know, I will not be around forever. So it's time I took an apprentice. I have chosen a cat who has shown a willingness to provide for and protect his Clan. Your next medicine cat will be Rushpaw."

Willowstar addressed the new apprentice. "Rushpaw, do you accept the post of apprentice to Sedgewing?"

The tom nodded, his chest puffed up with pride. "I do."

The medicine cat stood and smiled at Rushkit before she spoke once again. "Then at the half-moon, you must travel to the Moonpool to be accepted by StarClan before the other medicine cats."

"The good wishes of all WindClan will go with you," Willowstar meowed from her place on the Tallrock. She looked back at the remaining kits as Rushpaw and his new mentor touched noses and retreated into the crowd, waiting until the commotion and excitement among the gathered cats died down before speaking again. "Silentkit, you have reached the age of six moons. . ." Rainkit could not bear to listen any longer, his thoughts distracted by his own excitement and anticipation.

 _When'll it be my turn?_ Patience did not find him so easily, the ceremony feeling endless in his eagerness to finally be free. He dreamed of escape for more reasons than one. He wanted to escape the confining presence of the camp. He wanted to be free of the eyes he felt on his back whenever he dared to move. He wanted to find peace with himself and the life he lived.

"Rainkit," Willowstar meowed from the Tallrock, freeing him from his drifting thoughts. "You have reached the age of six moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you earn your warrior name, you will be known as Rainp—"

An angered voice rose from the crowd and Rainkit spun to face the it, searching for the cat who had interrupted. "Why are we allowing this piece of fox-dung the right to become an apprentice? Have you lost your mind, Willowstar?" the cat growled from someplace within the crowd.

Rainkit waited expectantly for some cat to come to his defense, to rebuke what had been said. Why isn't anyone stopping him? He realized with horror the possibility they could all be thinking the very same thing. He quivered as the feeling of dread rushed through him. A cold sweat ran down his spine, his breath short and ragged, his paws heavy and numbed by stress. "St-Stop. . . Please," he whimpered shortly. His chest heaved desperately for air, rising and falling in quick bursts of motion which threatened to suffocate him. _They. . . They all think the same thing. That's why they're not doing anything. They agree!_

"Stop it, Mistclaw! He knows the truth already. He knows that he was not born here! I told him everything a moon ago," Foxear yowled at the tom, her fur spiked up, teeth bared hostilely. "Beetle wasn't born in WindClan either, remember? He was a loner who requested to join. And although some of us did not take too kindly to him in the beginning"—she dipped her head respectfully to the warrior—"we soon accepted him as one of our own. Rainkit did not get the opportunity to make that choice. He has been with us for six moons! Six moons, and you still cannot find it within yourself to do the same as you've done for Beetle and accept him. You and some of the other warriors have got some nerve calling him a piece of fox-dung when your attitudes are just that: a pile of fox-dung."

Willowstar's furious yowl quieted the mess of heated arguments the she-cat's words had caused. "Silence, all of you! This has been the second time that an interruption like this has occurred at a Clan meeting. I won't stand for it any longer. If—"

Stormfang, a warrior Rainkit remembered to have harassed him moons ago, who stood defiantly at the front of the crowd across from him, spoke up, his lips pulled back into a snarl. "Then why don't you exile the useless scrap of fur, Willowstar? It would do us all a huge favor."

The leader remained unflinching as she watched the assembled cats. "Clan dismissed for now. Once I have given Rainkit his name and mentor without interruption, I will call everyone back to formally welcome our new apprentices. I do not want to hear any argument from anyone about this decision. The only cats permitted to stay besides Rainkit are Rabbitfur and Foxear. That is all. . . And if this does happen again, Stormfang, I will not hesitate to make your wish come true, but it won't be Rainpaw who's exiled from the Clan." With that she turned away, beckoning for the three cats she had named to follow her into her den.

Disbelief streamed through Rainkit. Foxear was right! The rest of the Clan were fox-hearts! He clawed at the grass furiously, hot rage bubbling up inside him. _All of this is Foxear and Antfoot's fault!_

The Clan began to dissipate, most scrutinizing him with watchful eyes. His pelt burning, Willowstar beckoned him inside her den with her tail.

When they all had settled inside, she sighed and addressed them, "I understand that this ceremony is normally done in the presence of all the Clan. However, given our current situation, I have decided that that will not be the case in regards to you, Rainkit. We will hold your ceremony here." The leader began anew in the privacy of the den, her voice soft yet powerful. "Rainkit, you have reached the age of six moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you earn your warrior name, you will be known as Rainpaw. Your mentor will be Rosewhisker." She paused, noticing the tom's sudden distress at her words. "Is something wrong?"

"Please, don't put me with her, Willowstar," the tom pleaded, his eyes wide with fresh fear.

"And why is that? Do you have a problem with my decision?"

He nodded, not knowing how he even remembered what he said next. "A few moons ago I wandered inside the warriors' den because I was playing a game some of the apprentices had made up. She was the first cat I saw, and I barely got more than a few words out before she hissed and swatted at me. Larkeye was there. They started arguing, and I was able to get away."

The she-cat nodded, her eyes questioning as she looked at Foxear. "Can you confirm this, Foxear? Is what he is saying true?"

The queen did not respond for a heartbeat, her face blank and confused until, it seemed, a memory came back to her. "I. . . Yes, it's true, Willowstar. He told me about what happened later that day."

This gave the leader cause to reconsider her decision, and she sat looking at the six-moon-old kit for a stretch of time. Clearing her throat, she meowed, "Given what you have told me Rainkit, and that Foxear has confirmed it, I've decided to go back on my earlier decision." The white she-cat leaned and whispered something to Rabbitfur, who then exited the den. He reappeared about a minute later with a warrior Rainkit remembered fondly: Petalheart. Once the pair had situated themselves, Willowstar continued the ceremony.

"Your mentor will now be Petalheart, Rainpaw. I hope Petalheart will pass down all she knows on to you." She paused to look at the amber-eyed warrior. "Petalheart, you are ready to take on an apprentice. You had received excellent training from Larkeye and you have shown yourself to be quick-witted and quite skilled in battle. You will be the mentor of Rainpaw, and I expect you to pass on all you know to him."

The she-cat turned to her new apprentice and shot him a small smile, making her way to him slowly in the now cramped space of the den. She touched noses with him. "These next moons won't be easy on you. You're going to have a lot to do and a lot to learn, so I want you to try your best and work hard, okay?"

The newly-made apprentice nodded vigorously, a bright smile on his face. "I will, Petalheart; don't worry!"

The warrior purred. "Good. . ." She looked over her shoulder. "Willowstar?"

The leader stood and shook out her pelt, glancing at Petalheart and giving her a small nod before exiting the den. Following the others outside, Rainpaw made his way back to the center of camp as Willowstar gathered the Clan together once more. "Rainpaw's mentor is Petalheart. Now, let us all formally welcome the newest apprentices of WindClan: Rushpaw, Rainpaw, and Silentpaw!"

Sitting there among the chorus of voices shouting his name, and those of his friends, over and over into the open sky, gave Rainpaw a renewed sense of confidence in himself. It didn't matter if he wasn't born in WindClan. It didn't matter that he might never find his real parents. He felt within himself in that moment that he truly was something in the world, something proud of itself for everything it had accomplished. And despite all that he had gone through before that single moment, Rainpaw greeted happiness like a long-lost friend. It embraced him with such gentleness that he did not want to ever leave it. The voices which rose up around him, those of his Clanmates, no longer sounded hostile or spiteful, only congratulatory and happy as they blended together into one. The murmurs of the cats who fought against him were drowned in the calls of the cats who fought with him.

In that moment, the passage of time seemed to stop and the air hang still, the happy calls of welcome weaving through the invisible web like dancing butterflies in a soft breeze.

Then it all just died away, and nothing was left but reality.

An eager voice came to Rainpaw's ears, bearing congratulations. Still stuck, momentarily, in his daydream, the tomcat did not react until a paw prodded his side and the voice repeated itself. The face of Rushpaw greeted Rainpaw as he turned. Offering a smile, Rainpaw flicked his ears and answered him. "You too, Rushpaw. Say, do you know who Silentpaw got as her mentor? I must've been so excited that I wasn't paying attention."

The cat nodded, "Mhmm. Beetle's her mentor. Speaking of mentors,"—he nodded his head to his right—"here comes yours now. I don't want to keep you; you've probably got something to do, and Sedgewing's waiting for me." As his friend scampered off, Rainpaw could see his own mentor coming up to him out of the corner of his eye. She smiled, sitting down in front of him and wrapping her tail around herself.

"Hi, Rainpaw. I was thinking we'd head out soon. Have you eaten anything yet?" The apprentice shook his head, his eyes focused on the fresh-kill pile. "Make sure you do; I'll be showing you our Clan's territory and borders today."

"When do we leave?"

"As soon as you've eaten. See me by the exit to camp in a few minutes. I'll be waiting." With that she took her leave and retreated inside the warriors den.

Rainpaw went to the pile and took a sparrow, settling down with his thoughts to eat. Silentpaw strode up to him with a smile on her face, her eyes bright and happy. " _Do you mind if I sit and eat with you?_ " she signed with her tail.

"No, I don't. Do you know where Scorchpaw is? I thought he'd still be in camp."

The apprentice shook her head and took a couple of mice from the prey pile, then sitting across from her friend. " _I think his mentor took him out training right after our ceremonies finished._ "

 _Stonefur's definitely on top of things._ "Petalheart said we were going to tour the territory today," Rainpaw meowed before taking a bit of the bird at his paws. "Did Beetle say what he'd planned to do?"

" _Battle training,_ " came her short reply.

The pair sat in silence for a little while, enjoying one another's company, until what sounded to them like a single voice called them away. Together, they hurried to where their mentors sat in wait of them, smiling and shouting excitedly as they went. Petalheart and Beetle exchanged amused glances before leading the two out of camp and onto the moor. Each gazed out over the open expanse in shock at the enormity of the world set before their eyes, and while Silentpaw could do little but stare, Rainpaw voiced the thoughts they both seemed to share.

"It-It's so big!" Yet, it felt smaller than it had moons ago, when he'd snuck out as a kit in the dead of night to be free of the confines of the camp. "Where are we headed first?"

Beetle purred, his eyes narrowing with amusement at the eagerness of the apprentice. "We're heading to the ThunderClan border. There, you'll see the Moonpool stream—our border with ThunderClan—and you'll learn how to mark the borders. After that, we're going to cross back over the territory and head to RiverClan's. You'll see the lake border when you go to your first gathering."

Setting off, the group trekked towards the line of trees in the distance. Rainpaw and Silentpaw couldn't contain their excitement long enough to stay with their mentors for more than a few heartbeats at a time, running ahead time and time again to explore and discover the place in which they lived, only to be called back moments later, Rainpaw's compliant groans drifting into the sky. It was all so new to them, strangely foreign, yet familiar in many ways. And while both believed their excursions away would last forever, their Clan's shared border with ThunderClan soon came into view.

Petalheart briefly explained the importance and process of border marking, then allowed the apprentices to try it for themselves. Rainpaw stepped away quietly, thinking about what RiverClan's territory would be like. Silentpaw's reaction, however, was a whole different story. Looking at the two older cats, she began to sign to them with her tail. Rainpaw watched Petalheart think for a moment, possibly in search of a way to respond to the gray she-cat.

"I understand. . . but. . . um. . . Rainpaw, what is she trying to tell us? I only understood a little of that," the warrior meowed hesitantly.

Silentpaw repeated the motions to Rainpaw. "She said, 'That was really weird. I don't want want to do it again.'"

Beetle smiled and cuffed his apprentice lightly over her ears. "Silentpaw, it's part of learning what you need to become a warrior. Did you think all Clan warriors did was hunt and fight?" She only nodded, inviting a small chuckle from her mentor. "You'll get used to it as you get more practice with it and start going on more and more border patrols." The tom paused for a heartbeat before shaking his pelt and walking in the direction of another Clan. "It's time we saw the border we share with RiverClan."

Rainpaw could not keep his eyes away from the mountains as they walked. "What about away from the lake? Do we have a border over there? Does any cat live there?" he blurted, unable to contain the swarm of questions which filled his mind.

Petalheart nodded, slowing her pace a little to walk beside her apprentice. "The mountains? We do have a border with them, but it's left unmarked."

"Why's that?"

"No cat has needed to travel there for seasons. And yes, cats do live up there. They're called the Tribe of Rushing Water."

 _Tribe of Rushing Water?_ The words sounded familiar to him, having heard them not long ago. Yet he felt them burrowed much deeper in his mind: a whisper in the dark; a distant memory; a hazy dream.

"I heard about them from Haretail. What were they like?"

Petalheart shook her head and sighed. "I cannot tell you that. No cat left here can tell you that. . ."

Rainpaw frowned and looked ahead to see a large, odd Twoleg nest come into view. Strange creatures moved about a stretch of grass, their heads bent and their tails swishing as they ate. "What are those weird animals over there?" he asked Petalheart, gesturing to them with his tail.

She smiled. "They're horses. They live there in the Horseplace." Curious now, the tom veered off towards them, bouncing along excitedly until Petalheart's sharp voice called him back. "Rainpaw, what exactly do you think you were doing?" she snapped when he returned to her.

"Going to see the horses. They don't look that scary."

"No WindClan cat _ever_ goes near them because they can trample and kill you if you're not careful. If I ever catch you trying that again, I will have you stuck cleaning out bedding for a moon. Have I made myself clear, Rainpaw?"

Her apprentice flattened his ears back against his head and nodded, "Yes, Petalheart."

The warrior watched him for another heartbeat before calling up ahead. "How much farther do you think we have until the border, Beetle?"

"Not much. It's just past these grasses up ahead," he returned.

Soon the group stopped, halted by a passing patrol. A gray tom stood speaking to Beetle. A little ways off was a calico she-cat, joined by several others. Immediately, Rainpaw noticed a familiar face, that of Jay. _Please StarClan, don't let him see me._

A paw prodded him in the shoulder: his mentor's. "Come on, Rainpaw. How about you go and introduce yourself."

Reluctantly, the apprentice obeyed, shyly making his way to the border. A gray tortoiseshell tom smiled and introduced himself as Minnowleap as Rainpaw neared.

"Hi. Nice to meet you too, Minnowleap. I'm Rainpaw." the tom remarked, ducking away slightly.

"Don't be scared. I'm not going to hurt you. Neither are Fallenpaw or Jay here." Minnowleap beckoned the calico closer. "Right, Fallenpaw?"

She nodded, a kind smile on her face. "Right. It's great to meet you Rainpaw." Purring, she added, "I've heard a lot about you at all the Gatherings I've been too."

Minnowleap let out a lighthearted scoff. "How many was that exactly? _Two?_ "

Fallenpaw turned and batted at the tom. "Hey! At least I can say I've been to one."

"Yeah? Well so has every other apprentice in the Clan?"

Fallenpaw rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Rainpaw. "How long have you been an apprentice for?"

Eyes downcast, he hesitated before answering, "Th-This is my first day."

An angered growl came up from somewhere behind the three and all turned to see Jay, whose eyes were narrowed, a bitter scowl marking his face. "Yeah? Well, I pray to StarClan that it'll be your last, too." The green-eyed tomcat stalked over to Rainpaw, hissing. "Why did Willowstar even—"

Suddenly, Jay was dragged back by Minnowleap, who snapped at him furiously. "How dare you speak to him like that! Keep your lousy, baseless opinions to yourself, would ya?"

Beetle and the gray tom he had talked to rushed over on noticing the sudden commotion. "Hey! What is going on here?" the gray tomcat demanded, looking as though he were holding back a growl.

Minnowleap turned to him with an apology in his gaze. "Sorry about all this, Boulderheart. Jay decided that it would be appropriate to berate a WindClan apprentice."

Boulderheart frowned and lashed his tail, "See him back to camp, and report this to Reedstar, please." Minnowleap nodded, ushering Jay away from the WindClan patrol in the direction of what Rainpaw believed to be RiverClan's camp. Boulderheart looked back at Beetle and Petalheart, quickly apologizing for what had just occurred.

"Maybe you should teach him something about respect," Petalheart huffed.

The RiverClan cat just shook his head. "Believe me when I tell you that Pebblenose tried. She had a hard time teaching him to even hunt for the Clan. . . Piece of work, that one." Rainpaw watched him turn away and begin to follow the path Minnowleap and Jay had taken. "Come on, Fallenpaw. We're heading back now."

Quickly, the she-cat trotted over to Rainpaw as the rest of his patrol began to leave. "Will I see you again at a Gathering, Rainpaw?"

He nodded, "I'm sure you will."

"Good," Fallenpaw said, turning away, her tail brushing the tom's muzzle.

Rainpaw followed her lead, bounding off to rejoin Beetle and Petalheart. His eyes darted about in a frenzy as he raced to meet them, taking all their was to see.

What he failed to see, however, was the cat who stood beside him since the beginning, the mask of utter dismay that she wore as she stared blankly after him.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading, everyone! If you feel like it, you can tell me what you thought in a review. :3  
**

 **QOTD: If you could have any animal in the world as a pet, what would it be?**

 **See you at the next update!**

 **\- Rain**


	14. What Can Be Found In The Shadows

**Hello, everyone! I'm back with another chapter. :D**

 **Recently, due to various reviews, I've been trying to work on expressing characters' emotions. I hope that you see that I've done that with this one.**

 **Anyway, on to the chapter.**

 **Enjoy!**

 **Chapter Thirteen: What Can Be Found In The Shadows  
**

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"You don't need to know."

She looked at him again, still pressing for information.

"Stop thinking that sitting there staring will get me to tell you. You don't need to know," he repeated dryly with a tilt of his head, then turning back to look at the gray clouded sky again. "If I told you, you wouldn't have any reason to stay."

Outside, dull gray clouds had formed, plodding along, together as one, toward the blue horizon with the pace of a worm, leaving a trail of wet ground, wind, and rain in their wake. This dreary weather had continued for several days, confining them to this cavern: a tumbledown of rock and stone. While he had grown used to it after a couple of days, she never did: incessantly pacing, fretfully drumming her claws on the stone beneath them, nonsensically rambling every now and then about her wanting to find a better place, slyly goading him into speaking.

This annoyed him the most.

She did not need to know.

The she-cat unsheathed her claws and began to tap them on the stony floor harshly. "But now you've got me curious. Why can't you tell me, Birdie?"

The tom huffed and rolled his eyes, shying away from the dull sky and returning his focus to her. "Because it's none of your business. Have I ever once inquired about that small, yellow thing you've got hanging around your neck? No." Stepping closer, he unsheathed his claws just enough that she could see their faint pallid surface. "And please, stop calling me 'Birdie'; you've been doing that ever since you got used to being here."

"There's nothing better to do around here except bother you with the weather like this."

He laughed a bit to himself. "Is that what you're used to then? Lying around all day being a nuisance to those around you?" His laughter soured into a snarl as he continued, noticing that his remark had struck a nerve. "I'd like to remind you that you're not there anymore. You can't just sit around and do nothing when it gets to be like this.."

"But I don't know what I even could do!" she whined, shredding a thin patch of grass with her paws.

The tom gazed at her for a moment, his fur spiking up at her idleness. " _I don't care_ what you do, just do _something_! Go look for prey in the burrows around here. Go take a walk by the forest. Go find a mouse and act like you can understand its squeaks for all I care!" He nodded to the large hole directly behind him. "Go on."

"But—"

He fixed her with a stare. " _Out_! Now! I don't want to see you again until the end of the day; I've had enough of your laziness."

Indignantly, obediently, the she-cat stormed out onto the grassy hills, tail lashing angrily, claws unsheathed and tearing up the ground as she walked, hotly muttering her displeasure with him. "Stupid, arrogant fleabag!" _He didn't have to be such a jerk! I would have done something after the weather cleared up!_ _And now here I am, out with the wind, and the mud, and the cold, looking for prey that's probably not even there, freezing my tail off while he's all warm and bundled up back there._

She stopped beside a small stone, gazing at it scornfully, seeing nothing but his smug expression as she did, and raising a paw, flung it away into the air, watching as it flew through the air and landed without a sound in the wet grass somewhere beside a neat burrow, a little larger than some of the others she had seen. _Maybe_ — Her legs trembled, and her ears grew flat as a gust of wind passed her by. _Maybe there's something in there. There's got to be. . . Right?_

Looking for a way to quickly reach it, the gray she-cat let her eyes drift over the moorland. She spotted a worn path of wet dirt, and seeing this as her only option, veered onto and began to follow it. Strangely, a trail of paw prints snaked along the path, their image pressed deep into the surface. Pausing to bend down and sniff them, she recoiled slightly with the belief that what she scented—the sharp, pungent smells of rot and blood—was only a trick of the gloomy weather.

Her legs shook as the mound, which she could see now looked more like a den, loomed closer. The scent became stronger here. She glanced back to the small space that she had left with the expectation of seeing her companion standing just inside the entrance watching her, shielded from the wind and the cold. Clearing her throat, she moved on, away from it and closer to the den.

Poking her head inside, seeing nothing but darkness, scenting nothing but stale and musty air, she retreated and continued on her way, heading for the forest that sat beneath the deep shadows of the peaks, which found themselves surrounded by swarming clouds that slunk past them with painful slowness.

The trees fidgeted and swayed in the breeze, their branches rattling and hissing as the wind moved between them. The she-cat gritted her teeth, even with the den and her uneasiness far behind her. _This isn't going to be fun. . ._ Her shoulders hunched and her head bent to stare at the ground in front of her as she walked, plodding along through the mess of wet leaves and slick mud left over from the previous day's rain.

That same overbearing scent she had found not minutes before met her here among the shadowed canopy of the forest, and she crinkled her nose as a faint whiff of it came to her. The memory of Birdie's harsh, glaring eyes still bore into her mind. She shook herself, needing to find distraction. Looking between the trees, she saw nothing except darkness and shadow, patches of dull sunlight blotting the ground. Opening her mouth to scent the air, the she-cat noticed that she could smell no single scent, as if every one had been muddled by the wet, earthy smells of the forest. She sighed. _What does he expect me to do out here? Even if I were looking for something, I can't even tell what's what._

Her body froze, her ears shot up as a low sound traveled through the trees and reached her ears. Backing away, the gray she-cat could not keep her eyes from darting from tree to tree as she tried to locate what she had heard. All the while, the noises grew louder as blood roared in her ears, her muscles poised to run. Still it felt closer with every second, the low rumbling noise, the sickeningly repulsive scent, and now, she could see, a pair of eyes, glinting in the gloom of the forest.

"H-Hello?" she called. A second passed. No response. "Is anyone there? If you are, show yourself!"

Again, no response.

"You're not very good at tag, are you?"

Jolted, the gray she-cat spun around and shrunk away from the sharp, trilling voice that responded to her. Then she realized something. _Tag?_ _I wasn't. . ._ "W-What do you mean? I wasn't playing t-tag with you." She gazed again into the understory, her breath quickening. "What do you. . . want from me?"

The bushes shook with the sound of laughter. "I just wanted to play, silly." A figure emerged and smiled at her, that of a white she-cat, blue-eyed, her face and pelt patched by black splotches. She looked delicate, her short fur clinging to her small, light frame. The cat frowned, scuffling her paws in the grass. "Is that too much to ask?"

"N-No," came her answer. "Just. . . who are you?"

"My name is Shade! What's your name?"

 _Should I even tell her?_ The gray she-cat, who still had not bothered to stand out of wariness, gave her pelt a shake. _I don't see any reason not to._ "Hickory," she replied.

Shade purred, leaning forward and and angling her ears towards the other she-cat. "Nice to meet you, Hickory."

Hickory fell silent and only managed a small nod of agreement. _What now? Do I just— No, she looks to young to be left to that._ "Do you want to come back with me to where I'm staying? You shouldn't be out here all alone, it's dangerous."

Shade just grinned, "For _you_ , that's for sure. You were scared out of your fur a minute ago." She closed her eyes a moment, opening them in the next heartbeat. "So, where are we going back to exactly?"

Hickory didn't turn to answer, remaining mute and only gesturing for Shade, who bounced on her paws, restless with energy, to follow her. The truth was, she didn't want to answer, didn't want to imagine what _he_ might say. Would he be as quick to accept this young stranger as she had been? Would he allow her to keep them company for a little while, or turn her away without a word. She did not know.

For a while, as they walked beneath the trees out towards the open sky, nothing but birdsong chimed in their ears, a lazy breeze appearing every now and then alongside it. Hickory permitted Shade to run up ahead of her and watched as the she-cat passed between the trunks of the trees without a care. She froze suddenly, her eyes wide. "Hickory, what's this?"

Grunting, Hickory hurried her pace towards where Shade stood, fixed on a slender-looking oak tree. "What is it now, Shade? This the fourth time you caused us to stop. If this is another bird's nest, or even a stupid plant for that matter, I think I'm going to go crazy."

Shade frowned. "Hey. I've only been stopping us because I found things that I believed you would've liked to see, things I thought you've never gotten a close look at. I've been living. . . living on my own for quite some time. I'm not clueless about any of this, Hickory, in case you were wondering. You, on the other paw, acted like you've never set foot outside in your entire life. The least you could do is be a bit more appreciative."

Hickory looked away, her ears hot. _She's right; and now I feel bad._ Great. Turning back, she asked, "What is it that you've found _this_ time?"

Shade glared at her for a moment then gestured to the trunk of the tree. A crisscross of small, jagged marks scored its bark, getting deeper and deeper as they headed for the base. "We should get out of here," she meowed, leaving the question unanswered. "Before we meet something that wants us dead."

Confused, Hickory watched the tree for another few moments. "I don't see anything wrong with this. It was probably another cat marking his or her territory."

"That is _exactly_ what we should've tried to avoid." Shade turned on Hickory, tail lashing. "Why didn't warn me about what we were walking into?"

"Oh I don't know, 'I've been living on my own for quite some time', I thought you knew where you were going!"

Shade bared her teeth, growling, "I'm not perfect; okay! And right now, we don't—"

A loud call jolted the pair. "You'd better leave now, before I find you and send you off without your tails!"

They took this in and ran, bolting towards the treeline they were headed for. Bursting out onto the moors, they stood, shocked and gasping for air.

Shade turned to Hickory after she caught her breath, narrowing her eyes slightly. " _Now_ can you tell me where we're going? Since you still haven't even done that. Or am I just going to be your unwitting captive?"

The gray she-cat rolled her eyes and pointed off in the distance, over the hills. "You see that big, gray, rock-looking structure past the next few hills or so?" Shade nodded but kept silent. " _That_ is where we are going." With a sigh she added, "Happy now that you got your answer?"

Shade puffed out her chest a bit, beaming. "Yes I am."

"Well, good. I'm glad." Hickory replied gruffly, continuing on, with or without the white she-cat. _I'm starting to regret giving her the chance to come back with me. She's growing into a real pain in the tail.  
_

As the sun sank down towards the horizon, past the endless forest of trees and clouds, Hickory and Shade came up to the place Hickory had described, which now lay in a fog of light and shadow. Moving past Shade and disappearing around a corner, Hickory ducked inside and glanced around for her companion, calling for him quietly.

"You're back late," a voice meowed. "That's good. Did you find anything?"

Hickory paused to scratch at her ear. "Yes." _I don't suppose you actually did anything while I was gone.  
_

"Well, where is it?" he meowed eagerly, licking his lips. "Come on, bring it inside."

With a small nod, she exited, returned to Shade, and asked quietly that she follow her.

She had expected this reaction from him, a scowl of disappointment and anger. Despite that, his the light brown tom's voice remained steady. "Uh. . . Hickory, who's our guest?"

Ducking her head, she remained quiet for a heartbeat. "She's a cat I met out in the forest. I invited her here."

"And _why_ did you do that?" he inquired with a tight smile.

Hickory sighed. "I thought it was too dangerous for her to be out there alone."

"And you think you're any safer? I thought I told you to stick by the moor!"

The she-cat glared at him, flicking her tail. "You're. . . You're not my mother! You can't boss me around!"

The tomcat frowned, flicking his tail dismissively. "Let's continue this outside, please."

Hickory watched him go, his tail vanishing around a corner, leaving her and Shade alone in the darkness. A moment later, she followed, a frown tugging at her mouth, and sat across from him, beside a trampled heather patch. "I thought you'd be okay with this. I thought she could help us."

He stretched, his paws flexing in the grass. "Well, I'm obviously not. I hoped that you would bring us back something we could have used, like food; instead, all you done is brought us back another mouth in need of it. And _how_ exactly do you think she could help us? Hickory, it's been horrible like this for quite a while now. If we allow her to stay, it's only going put more of a strain on us, now, and in the future. She _is not_ staying with us. That's final."

"Hey! Don't I get any say in this?"

He smiled and shook his head, eyes focused on the ground. "Oh, I don't know. Maybe you should've thought about that." Rising to his paws, he skirted past her and went back to where Shade was left to wait.

Hickory sat outside, expecting a loud argument between the two of them. Nothing, only what sounded like quiet whispers, came from the den. Soon, the sound of paw steps made her turn to see Shade emerging from the tall structure, padding on towards the forest without so much as a glance in her direction. Getting up and dragging herself back inside, Hickory slumped down into a pile of bedding: heather and tall grasses taken from the surrounding area. "Why did you have to do that? She didn't _have_ to—"

"Sometimes, Hickory, to do the greatest good means doing nothing at all."

"But—"

"Shade, was it?" Hickory nodded. "Shade explained her situation. I didn't see anything that made it sound at all like she was in need of our help. For her age, based on what she told me, she's certainly capable of handling herself."

 _What if she wasn't? He probably just killed her!_

"I'm pretty sure you're itching to say something, but don't. Just get some rest, Hickory. It's been a long and very frustrating day." With that, he ambled to the far corner of the space which he called home and curled up, tail over his nose, closing his eyes and falling asleep.

Sighing, unwilling to stay awake, Hickory sunk down into the bedding beneath her and dreamed.

She dreamed of memories.

She dreamed of home _._

She dreamed of _her._

That horrible feeling of grief never went away. It loomed behind her like a shadow. She tried to dream of happier memories, of her life when she still saw her mother Tara. She remembered the warm glow of light that watched over them all at night, the encouraging words of her mother and father as they watched her grow. Hickory knew she could not return to those times, yet she dreamed of them anyway. They were her escape.

Tara was sitting by the far wall, on a brightly colored pillow. Hickory sat across from her, listening as she explained something. She could not hear her words. She must have forgotten. Then another memory came, of her mother and father standing beside the garden's old fence as she looked on from the safety of the steps, much younger than she was now.

" _Hickory, sweetie, nothing bad is going to happen. What's got you so worked up?"_ Tara meowed from where she stood beside Everest, wide-eyed.

" _I-I don't w-want to leave."_

 _"We're not goin' to make you leave, Hickory,"_ Everest had said, padding closer to her and smiling. _"We just want t' make sure you know what's out there."_

 _"Wh-What_ is _past the fence, Everest? M-Mean cats? Dogs? Bad housefolk?"_

Everest had purred and touched his nose to her ear. " _None of that. Only the world."_

After that day, everything left her. After that day, _she_ had started to leave _them._ After that day, a new chapter in her life had begun to be written.

She wanted to leave the dream behind, to tuck it away in the shadows. But that memory still haunted her mind, always finding a way to return.

Then she dreamed of something else.

A great storm lashed at the world, rain pouring down from the clouds outside in an endless tide and thunder bellowing a war cry from the gray sky, while she sat watching it with her mother and father. She remembered this: her first real experience with a thunderstorm, when she was only two moons old. But this time Tara and Everest were not there to protect her and calm her fears. She could not search for them; her eyes were fixed on the white bolts of lightning that dashed from the clouds, which cast the world in white.

For several long moments after her sight came back she could not see through the pelting she spotted a distant figure padding through the storm, looking unaffected by the harassment of the water and the boom of the thunder. She could not see them clearly, only their faint outline visible in the gloom, yet she _knew_ they were there.

Hoping to reach them, she bounded outside into the rain, feeling the stinging little claws dig into her fur. Hunching herself, she pressed on towards the figure, clenching her jaw.

" _Hickory."_ She turned back, startled, seeing nothing.

" _Hickory!"_ The word, the voice, came again, more urgently, yet still she could not see a thing within the gloom.

Then the ground shook, tossing her to her side forcefully and plunging her back into darkness.

Then there was light; and she bolted upright, awake, stunned and confused.

"What are you doing here?" she growled through bared teeth.

"I wanted to come back to see you."

Hickory locked over to the far corner across from her and leaned forward for a heartbeat. "You should leave."

"Why? I don't—"

"Yes," she meowed, locking eyes with her visitor, "you do. You know what you were told. If he— If he finds out that you came back. . ."

The cat puffed out her chest. "I promise you he won't."

"I wouldn't make that promise so quickly if I were you."

Both started at the sudden interruption and turned to the far wall. Only his eyes were visible from within the darkness, and Hickory began to wonder if he was smiling. "Sparrow, please just leave her be," she cautioned.

He padded out to meet them with a smile on his face. "I think we need to have a talk. _Both_ of you."

* * *

 **Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it.**

 **Please review if you did. It lets me know what you think and what I can improve on.**

 **And before I go, I have one more thing to say:**

~Each memory is a trail to follow. Every word is just another step towards where we roam.~

 **:3**

 **Have a good day/night guys,**

 **Rain**


	15. Pulled

**Hey, everyone! I'm back (after two months ;-;). Recently, given that I'll be in college after summer ends this year, school has taken on a much higher importance and priority. I do plan to put this story on a much longer hiatus-until June-after this chapter.** ** **That does not mean that I'm dropping this story. I'm going to use the time to write the remaining chapters and finish what I started. I hope none of you mind.  
****

 **Anyway, I have another chapter: the setup for the main bulk of the story as a whole.  
**

 **Enjoy!**

 **Chapter Fourteen: Pulled  
**

* * *

Dashing through the frostbitten moors he felt free. It was more freedom than he believed he would ever experience. The young apprentice—now a little more than seven moons in age—felt his heart pound in his chest, just as his paws pounded against the cold ground. His body soared across the open expanse, undeterred by the wind that clawed at his face. The tom paused a minute, breathless, as he saw a she-cat calling out to him far behind.

He wanted to ignore her, but knew that he could not, knowing who she was. He turned, eyes bright, and watched as she made her way down the frostbitten hill towards him, taking each step carefully so she would not tumble the rest of the way down. All around, small little piles of snow had congregated together. Yet most felt only frost. He knew that most of the moorland creatures were tucked safely away in their burrows and tunnels. Why then were they out here? The tom, fearing what would happen if he did so again, didn't question it. He was told it was important that he learn what he needed, even in the cold. The young tomcat, watched her, Silentpaw, as wispy flurries of frosted snow drifted down to her smoky pelt-a dark blot on the white landscape.

She spoke wordlessly, pointing up the hill now and again. Her eyes lowered dangerously, unsettlingly narrowed.

" _Rainpaw, why do you keep running off!"_

 _Rainpaw_ did not like this her; the angry her, the impatient her. He wanted the old Silentpaw back, the one who would have been okay just to talk. Had training ripped something from her? He did not know. He did not like it. The tom curled his tail over his chest, leaving her question hanging in the still air, padding behind Silentpaw as she led him back up the chilled rise. His shoulders slumped on seeing the three faces before him—the furrowed, angered faces of Petalheart, Beetle, and Stonefur—faces he wished he didn't have to see. Stonefur, eyes narrowed, as wordless as Silentpaw, said nothing. Rainpaw saw then, with his head lowered by remorse, what he had done and what they had wanted him to see. "I'm sorry; it won't happen again," he murmured, bowing his head.

Petalheart lashed her tail. "It better not. These two"—she flicked her tail to Silentpaw and Scorchpaw in turn—"listened when we told them to stay close. Just because you were shown the territory doesn't mean you can run off whenever you feel like it, Rainpaw."

All he did was nod. What more could he do when so many eyes were on him? He shrank, shriveled to something smaller than a blade of grass inside, as he felt the numerous couples of eyes lock on him. But he could not deny the tugging pull he felt within which beckoned him toward the place where the sun rose each day.

Beetle let his gaze fall on each of the apprentices, stopping for a heartbeat longer than the rest on Rainpaw. He looked over at Petalheart, his ears turned down a small way. "Come on, Petalheart. Sure, he ran off, but that doesn't mean he shouldn't be allowed to have some fun."

Petalheart shot the tom a quick, meaningful glare, brushing the remark off like snow.

"Today," Stonefur meowed, "you all are going to practice more partner fighting with the three of us, like you did yesterday. WindClan might not have as much of a need for it as the other Clans, but it's still important that you realize how useful it can be." The she-cat paused, nodding her head to the other two mentors. Beetle stayed beside Stonefur, while Petalheart positioned herself a few fox-lengths away in a crouch. Once Petalheart had settled, Stonefur continued. "I want all three of you to imagine that Petalfur is an enemy warrior. . . How would you each approach the situation if you were alone? Silentpaw?"

" _Fighting defensively._ "

"Good. Scorchpaw?"

"Trying to confuse my opponent."

"All right. And Rainpaw?"

"Surprise."

"Okay," Stonefur replied, dipping her head to Beetle. "Beetle would you mind telling them more?"

"Not at all." He smiled at the apprentices, his whiskers twitching. "All of those answers are good, but they do have their strengths and weaknesses, just like you three. Partner work, both in hunting and fighting, can help compensate for whatever weaknesses you may have. _That_ is why working with a partner is so beneficial: you and your partner can cover for each others' faults and build off your individual strengths." The black tom turned to Petalheart, "Are you set?"

She meowed a quick confirmation. Both Beetle and Stonefur then turned and crouched low to the frost. Petalheart advanced forward, her paws shifting soundlessly on the frozen earth. Then she sprang, leaping with sheathed paws for the other two warriors. The pair sidestepped, whipping around to strike the she-cat's flanks. Petalheart spun on her paws as Beetle and Stonefur retreated, battling each as best she could one-on-one.

This continued for a while, the snow never ceasing. Although they did. The three mentors paused from time to time to explain something or add on to what their apprentices already knew, until the finally allowed the young cats to have their own chances.

Rainpaw grinned, bouncing lightly on his paws as Silentpaw moved across to where Petalheart had positioned herself. The tom glanced over at Scorchpaw, who nodded in response. When they both had turned back, Stonefur waved her tail. And the apprentices were off, moving at each other purposefully.

Silentpaw swiped at her opponents as she neared.

Rainpaw flinched away for a heartbeat while Scorchpaw continued, pressing on despite the attack. Clearing his head, Rainpaw flattened his ears and followed after, moving for the she-cat's front as his partner went for her back. Silentpaw, Scorchpaw and Rainpaw each traded blows until, when the sun stood above them all, they were told to stop and their roles were changed.

For a while longer they continued, now and then changing their role in the practice. For a long while, Rainpaw couldn't focus on anything but what lay in front of him: the slim bodies of his friends, the speed of their movements as they struck out, at him or with him.. Everything-time- moved by in a blur, and soon Stonefur called for them. The group moved back swiftly to the camp, trekking among browning heather and snow-covered grass.

Scorchpaw sniffed at the air and glanced up at the clouds, in the direction of the setting sun, his shoulders heavy. "I don't think the snow's going to let up soon. Looks like there's a storm on the horizon."

" _Let's hope it passes us by and heads towards the mountains._ "

Scorchpaw nodded his agreement, looking back at Rainpaw as the tom slipped into the camp. "Where do you think the storm will head, if it's even going to come at all?"

Rainpaw shrugged, meowing a goodbye to his mentor and making for the apprentices' den, "Probably where it belongs."

"Maybe your right," Scorchpaw said, walking alongside Rainpaw but stopping when he reached the entrance to the den. "Anyway, I'm going to go see how Rushpaw and Sedgewing are doing. Whenever I see Foxear, she always stops me and asks how you're doing. It's like your one of StarClan to her: you're there, but she never sees you. Why don't you go pay her a visit?" Scorchpaw turned away, soon ducking into the crevice between a pair of boulders which housed the medicine den.

Rainpaw looked down at his paws, an army of ants crawling beneath his pelt.

 _He_ is _right. After she revealed to me that I'm not her son, I pretty much disowned her._ _No matter what happened then, she always cared for me, always defend me. I just tossed her aside as if she were crowfood. I-I should go talk to her. . .  
_

He walked over to the warriors' den, his eyes two dark blue pools thrown in shadow.

"Foxear?"

"She's not here. Doesn't want to talk to you since all you've done is push her away."

"Good job being supportive and helpful, Mosswhisker," Larkeye remarked quickly.

"What is it, Rainpaw?" Foxear mewed, looking up sluggishly, awoken by the chatter.

"I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for pushing you away. Even though you and Antfoot aren't my real family, you're both still a big part of my life. And even when I leave this world and find my way into the next, I won't forget you."

She smiled, arching her back as she stood to face him. "Thank you for talking to me. We'd never want to see you angry with yourself, Rainpaw. Every cat eventually does something in their lifetime that, when they look back on it, they aren't proud of. It's something that's just a part of life."

Rainpaw felt a warm shiver spread beneath his skin, a purr catching in his throat. "Thank you, Foxear," he mewed, nuzzling her. She cuffed his ears with her tail, and then he left, happier than when he'd arrived heartbeats before.

A gray shape caught the edge of his vision and he turned to see Silentpaw, her tail waving in greeting. He detoured, heading to the prey pile and taking a small hare off the dwindling pile, grabbing also a few field mice for himself.

Rainpaw looked the hare over, noticing that red smeared its white muzzle. _Probably just blood from when I brought it down yesterday,_ he dismissed the thought with a shrug. The tom took the hare back and set it in front of his friend, motioning for her to come and eat as he sat with the mice at his paws. "What did you think of training today? Learn anything different from last time?" he questioned absently.

" _Yeah, how clumsy you and Scorchpaw are as partners!_ "

Rainpaw grinned, his eyes scrunched up as he cuffed the other apprentice over the ears. "As if you did better with either of us!"

She watched him for a moment, not moving, before taking another, quick, bite of the hare. " _You're probably right, but least I didn't forget nearly everything a few minutes after that first time._ " Rainpaw frowned, lashing his tail once, then starting on another one of the mice. " _You_ know _I'm right, Rainpaw. You weren't even paying attention today. Beetle had to ask me to go fetch you. That wasn't very fun._ "

"Well sorry for wanting to live a little more, Silentpaw," Rainpaw scowled. "Life _isn't_ just about survival; it's also about discovery and growth."

" _Oh, so staring off at a bunch of rocks as though they're the only thing in your world is living! What about the Clan, Rainpaw!_ _What about—"_ Silentpaw stood abruptly and departed for the apprentices' den, her shoulders hunched, head bent low as she walked, her movements twitchy and erratic.

 _What about what? Becoming a warrior? Training? What was she going to say?_

Flustered, he rose to his paws and headed fringes of the camp and curled up, shutting his eyes before Scorchpaw could come and question him.

* * *

She felt a consuming fire within her.

Every movement withing the darkness of her dream pained her.

She was trapped on ice, yet fire entombed her.

No light came from the sky except a dull, mortifying orange, grinning down at her maliciously, gleefully.

She felt as if she would die there, stuck out on the ice, yowling for help. But no hope came.

What was going on, she was thinking in a rush of panic, lashing about wildly as she fought for sight of a way to escape. It did not come.

All she could see was the fire; all she could feel was the pain; all she could hear were her own soundless screams of agony.

The fire split and cracked the ice as splintering shards of ember nipped at her fur, and more of the greedy flames arched into the air, barreling down for her, engulfing her, scarfing her down like a hungry fox, and yet still it did not end, her pain increased, her panic grew, her frantic lashing grew faster and faster and faster, never ceasing as she struggled in claws of Death, until finally every thing stilled, the fire destroyed by light, and _her_ light had gone away.

She lie there, cold, stilled, on the ice with the light of the world gone and darkness her only comfort.

Then the light returned and she could see once more, overjoy at the ember of warmth in her soul, breathe a sigh of relief and say that she was finally _free_.

Their light welcomed her, embracing her and taking her into its safety and protection.

They looked upon her with warmth, kindness in their eyes, and shimmering swirls about them.

Every question they answered for her without delay. Every fear was calmed, and soon she felt truly safe.

She did not think of the light as home.

But it was her home now, just as it was for those who lived seasons upon seasons before her.

* * *

They stared in horror at what _he_ had wrought, what _he_ taken from them.

Every one looked on in blank shock, on every mind a single question.

Why?

* * *

 **That's the chapter. Hope you liked it.  
**

 **See you all in June!  
**

 **Happy reading,**

 **Rain**


	16. Left

**Chapter Fifteen: Left**

* * *

It all happened so fast that he could not remember when he started to run, to leave them all behind.

He had seen Sedgewing go in, appearing again minutes later to pronounce her dead. He had seen Scorchpaw stand among the crowd, and heard him shout out that she had been murdered. _That I had murdered her._ He saw them look to him in shock, appalled and horrified, heard their furious questions and their denials. That was when he wanted to run, but they advanced upon him so instantaneously that he could not.

All had crowded around him, jostling and shoving him forward, towards the white she-cat who would decide his fate. Her mother stood by, snarling and spitting and hissing her fury. She wanted him killed, said that not even his ancestors would forgive him for what he did in taking that life from the world. Some agreed, some protested, some were themselves unsure. Scorchpaw had been asked to explain what he had said, the notion of cold murder that had riled every mind into frenzy. He was for sure then he would be killed. He had felt a sickening cold ice over his heart which not even the calls for exile seemed to thaw. Was he dead to them already? Had he ever truly belonged with them?

Then the white cat spoke, his fate sealed at the drop of her words— _"Send him away."—_ and every eye turned to him, snarls cracked through the muzzles of many, and they were on him again. Like foxes they went to drive him away from the only place he had ever known, the place called "home." But he had turned and run, darted onto the moors as fast as his young body could carry him. In self-exile he fled the shelter that no longer sheltered him; for the first time in his life he was alone.

 _I'd never asked to be driven away. I did not kill her. It was an accident. . ._

O _h, yes, an accident. Then why didn't you stop to question when you saw what was on its muzzle, the_ blood _?_ _Why didn't you bury it? She would still be alive._

He slowed his pace.

Why hadn't he? Had he wanted her to die? _No._ She was his friend. She never did a single thing to harm him.

Why then had he done that?

He let the thought crumble away into dust. and began to focus on where he was headed instead of what he had left. The snowy hills stretched on for a long while and the sun still continued to creep along its unchanging path, the light retreating to make way for bitter darkness. As the sun drew down into the cover of the mountains, in shadow he could see some large broken stone structure which marred the moors with its unsightly shadow.

 _Maybe I could rest there for the night. I haven't got any other place I should be heading._ Then he remembered Feathertail, and a long-forgotten dream he once had.

He had sat upon stone, behind him the shimmering reflection of the sunlight that passed through the entrance to the cave. He could hear nothing but the crash of the water, the roaring noise that attacked his ears. He had seen her then, and all he could remember now was the final thing she had spoken before the dream escaped him.

"'Watch the skies where eagles roam. The sparrow will guide you on your way.' . . . I've heard stories about the eagles up in the mountains from Haretail, but those are probably so old that I can't be sure that they even exist anymore. And I've already been guided by a sparrow. All it led me two was Antfoot lying dead in the snow. So what am I missing?"

Rainpaw shook himself and decided against discontinuing the journey. _Maybe Haretail's words still held some truth. He wouldn't have a very good reason to tell those stories if they weren't even a little true. I guess that's where I'll head then_ —he felt his eyes get heavy under the demands of sleep— _after I get some rest._ The tom continued onward, his paws numb and aching by the time he reached the stone structure.

As he got closer, he could hear noises drifting out from within. The fur on the back of the tom's neck rose sharply. The noises steadily changed, transforming into voices as he listened. There were two, he concluded, and as far as he guessed, none of the cats they belonged to had noticed him. He edged closer, sniffing the air to find unfamiliar scents. Among them he found scents he recognized as those of ThunderClan's territory: trees, grasses, and brush. But there was also one in particular that he could not identify, even if he tried. It was a mix of scents from around the Horseplace, and something entirely different. It was that unknown scent that appalled him.

A voice came from within, more clearly heard than before. "I'm going to get some air, Hickory. Why don't you call it a night."

He paused, stiffening.

He saw a brown tomcat make his way out from the structure and cautiously watched as he stretched, turning to groom his ruffled fur. The tom looked up from his washing after a few minutes, a glint in his eyes as he spotted his visitor. "And who might you be?" he inquired plainly, as though he experienced this before.

Panic invaded Rainpaw's mind. _What do I tell him? That I left from my home? That I accidentally killed a cat? a friend? That my entire life was one big lie? Should I even tell him my name?_ "My name is Rainp— Rain. My name's Rain. And yourself?"

The brown tomcat flicked his tail dismissively, "I don't have to tell you that. I'm not the one trespassing, am I?" He arched his back and turned to Rainpaw. "Are you just passing through, or are you planning to stay with us?"

"Us?"

The cat nodded, "There are two others here with me. So I'll ask again: passing through or planning to stay?"

 _Three of them? I only thought there were two._ "Passing through," Rainpaw replied without hesitation. I don't want to be anywhere near that place. Not anymore.

"Well Rain, you look in need of a place to stay anyhow," the tom remarked, looking Rainpaw over. "I believe we'll only be able to let you stay for a few days. It's been a struggle with space as it is. This place is certainly not a barn, that's for sure. Is that all right with you, though?"

 _Barn?_ "It is, thank you."

"I would let you introduce yourself to the others, but that will have to wait until tomorrow, I suppose." The brown tom beckoned for Rainpaw as he made his way back in the tall, broken structure. "Make yourself at home, Rain," he meowed in a whisper. "There are probably a few good spots left in here."

Rainpaw nodded, stepping gingerly over the maze of tails and paws as he headed for a dark corner of the space and settled down, glad to finally feel free of what he had left.

It was a new beginning, and all he had to do was follow the setting sun. . .

* * *

"How can we trust him?"

He had listened to their bickering for who-knew-how-long now, and still he did not know their names. Despite all his efforts, the brown tom who Rainpaw had met the previous night appeared to be losing his argument to a much younger—by the look of her—gray she-cat, all while another cat sat by mutely, not bothering to look in their direction. The silent cat, a white she-cat with black splotches, was probably more interested in the gray weather than the chatter of her companions.

The brown tom bristled when Rainpaw turned his attention back. "Hickory, he's passing through. He'll be gone in another day or two, then we won't have to see him again. Drop the temper, please."

"How can I," she challenged, "when all you've done is given us a burden to lug around! Does he even know how to hunt?" Hickory, who Rainpaw now knew was the gray she-cat, turned her gaze on him now. "Well, do you?"

"I, um, yes, I do."

"Good, then get to it. I'm not going to have you sit around doing nothing."

"I'll go with him, Hickory." The white-and-black she-cat spoke. "Might as well show him around, let him get his bearings."

Hickory shifted, her mouth still tugged down. "Then what are you doing lazing about here still, Shade?"

Without reply, Shade left the cramped space, leaving a flustered she-cat and an indifferent tom behind, and an anxious visitor to follow. She waited for him beneath the gray clouds among browning leaves and cold-scorched grasses. She did not appear disturbed at all by the frigid weather. She looked more comfortable here then he was. As he came to her, she flicked her tail, eyes flashing with interest. "You probably want to know what's got Hickory so aggravated right?"

Rainpaw shrugged while his fur flared out against the cold. "You could say that. I also want to know that other cat's name."

"I can't tell you that, Rain."

"Well why in Sta—" He paused, correcting himself. "Why in all the stars not?"

"Because I don't know that either. He never told me. Do you think I would have interrupted if I knew? . . . As for Hickory, lately things have been rough for her. There's an Upwalker colony not far from here where she used to live. The cat's there aren't that used to used to this sort of chill. For all I know, she's afraid."

"Afraid of what?"

"Dying out here like her mother is my guess. Hickory told me about her the day after I met her, and about where she came from too. Her mother, Tara, if I recall, had left one night a long while ago and died out on the hills near the colony. Hickory said that a friend of hers had told her something odd that Tara said when he'd seen her: 'The sparrow will guide him on his way.'

Rainpaw stiffened and his blood ran cold as ice. "What did you say?" he asked, dry-mouthed and panicked.

Shade repeated herself, to which Rainpaw spun back and ran towards the stone den. "Hey! Where are you going!"

"I need to speak with her!" he called back.

 _Tara knew something. And I need to find out what._

* * *

"No, Rain, Leo never told me what she meant."

The tom shifted on his paws, nervous and anticipating some new bit of information, "Do you have any idea what or who 'the sparrow' might be?"

Hickory sighed, looking around the dark space. The two stayed up past dusk, hushed whispers their only communication. Shade and the tom had fallen asleep, but Rainpaw insisted she stay up to answer his questions. "I might, but I doubt the information will be of any use to you. This cat that you told me about; Featherfall was it?"

"Feathertail."

"Thank you. Feathertail definitely sounds more knowledgeable about this whole thing, given that she was the cat who told you. Correct?" He nodded. "Good. If I were you, I would ask her. She might have the answers you need. I don't know what Shade might have told you, but I do not."

"She, and the cats she lives with, are not very clear when they relay information. Most of the time, it never makes sense right away. Takes a while to figure out."

Hickory arched her back and walked over to her nest in the den, "I would still ask her. Just to be safe." She yawned and closed her eyes. "There. . . can't be any. . . harm in that. . . can there?"

"No."

"Then good night, Rain."

Rainpaw shook himself, heading to his own nest.

* * *

Light consumed him. Every which way he saw nothing but gray rock and barren stone. All he wanted to see was her. He hoped his dreams had led him to a place where he could see her again. He had not spoken with her in what felt like seasons. All he wanted was to speak with her.

But he did not see her anywhere.

Instead, he found the shadow of another, plodding towards him with confident strides. The cat settled down in front of him and twitched its whiskers. "Go ahead and ask your questions. I'm sure you have many things you want to ask. 'Where do I go next?' 'What am I looking for?' 'Why am I here and you're not?'—Save that one for her if you do get the chance; please, Rainpaw. You already know the answers to these questions. All you have to do is think." The cat stood and made to leave.

"Wait!" Rainpaw pleaded. "I know I wanted to get away, but is there another reason why I am doing this, why I am making this journey?"

The cat flicked its tail and offered him a smile, not turning to fully face him, "Once you hear the snow's song, you will know why." The cat returned on its way, ambling gracefully over the craggy ground as if it had done so all its life.

Rainpaw was left confused. When he tried to follow after, the distance between them only seemed to increase, and so he gave up trying. He mulled over what he heard right, kicking the small stones he found strewn about in a carefree manner. This too ultimately became boring, and he curled up and let his eyes stagger closed and fitful "sleep" lead him back to reality.

* * *

He was shaken awake to the warmth of the sun, but his eyes remained lightly closed, and in all that time he had gotten to think.

Three pairs of eyes stared like hawks, and the warmth quickly drained from his features when he felt their collective gaze bore into his back.

"Did you speak with her?" one asked. He could not shake his head.

"Who is this her, you're talking about?" another inquired. Silence was the only one to respond for a few heartbeats.

"Feathertail," said the first, sounding agitated.

"And how is that strangely-named cat somehow important?" the other asked, equally unnerved.

"I told him that she might have the answers he was looking for, because I didn't."

"That's all well and good, but what are we standing around him for if he's not even up yet?" the third, who remained mute until now, asked the others.

He was shaken again, more roughly, and his eyes flashed open. "What is it!"

Hickory shifted on her paws, "I wanted to ask you if you got the chance to talk to Feathertail yet."

Rainpaw nodded. "I did. Went out last night." It wasn't so much a lie as it was the truth. Right? The tom certainly hoped so. Hickory nodded, purring. "I have a question, though," he continued, looking at the dark brown tom. "I know their names,"—Rainpaw indicated to Shade and Hickory—"but not yours. What is it?" The tom stood in silence there as though made of stone. Hickory flashed Rainpaw a warning glance, but he ignored it, pressing the question until he relented and turned to Hickory. "You told me you know what his name is."

"Should I tell him?" she questioned the tomcat standing at her side.

"I don't see why not. You already told him that you know what it is," he remarked, fixing her with a glare.

Hickory turned back to Rainpaw and took a deep breath before answering with, "His name is Sparrow, Rain."

Realization quickened Rainpaw's heart as he gazed confidently at Sparrow.

"I need your help."


	17. Mourning Snows

**Chapter Sixteen: Mourning Snows**

* * *

"My help with what, Rain? How to live your life? . . . Sorry, but I'm not exactly the kind of cat to ask for aid with matters like that. I'm not some sort of guide."

"No, not with how to live my life, Sparrow. With what direction I need to head next."

"I already told you that I'm not a guide whose going to help you live your life. I _do not_ do that."

Rainpaw inclined his head in a brief nod. "I know; I didn't mean it like that. Please, just help and point me in the right direction. I believe I am where I am supposed to be to continue now, even though I didn't at first. Feathertail's been helping me so far, but now I'm certain it's your turn."

Sparrow bristled as Rainpaw quieted, "And what makes you so certain that I _will_ help you?" The dark-furred tom turned his back to those around him and went to sit at the mouth of his stone den, sighing contentedly as the chill air danced around his fur. Rainpaw looked between Shade and Hickory, searching for an explanation.

Shade flicked her ears dismissively, but Hickory spoke reassuringly, whispering that he was only being stubborn.

Sparrow turned to look back at them over a shoulder. "When you told me you were passing through, how long did you _intend_ to stay?"

"Only one or two days," Rainpaw replied earnestly. "I wouldn't want to be a burden on you." Sparrow's next words caused him to visibly grimace.

"Well you are. Right now, standing here, you are. I know that I permitted you to stay with us, but I did not expect it to be this long.

Rainpaw stood at a loss for words.

"You came this way from that big lake, correct?" Rainpaw nodded. " _And_ you're on some kind of journey, correct?" Another nod. "Great. Just _great_. . . Are all of you cats who travel from that place on some sort of journey, guided by some out-of-their-mind spirit? Sure seems like it to me, Rain. In my eyes, you're just as delusional as that 'Feathertail' you've said you've been listening to this entire time. Why can't you just be happy with what you have? Why does there always have to be some higher purpose to your travels? Why is that the only reason why you cats ever seem to go anywhere?"

"I don't know," the younger tom stammered. His whiskers lay flat against his muzzle.

Sparrow hissed, "Of course you don't! None of you ever do!" He straightened to a sitting position and exhaled slowly with his eyes closed. "You know, now that I think about your being here, you weren't the first cat to come this way and decide to stay, Rain."

Rainpaw tipped his head. "Really?" Sparrow nodded.

"She told us—Hickory and me—that her name was Song. She said she was searching for her kit, but I believed that it was grief that made her say those things. Song just had this cloud over her head all those moons ago, like her kit had lost her, instead of the other way around. We allowed her to stay for as long as she wanted, until her grief had passed—about a quarter-moon if I recall—and then she bade us farewell and kept going on her way towards the mountains."

"Did she say anything else to either of you?" Rainpaw pressed, looking between Sparrow and Hickory.

"Oh yes," Hickory chimed in, sighing as though she were recalling some fond memory of that time. "She told the two of us on the day she left that she needed to get back to her home, and some cat she called 'Stoneteller.' It was all so strange; she never once looked back, never called over her shoulder to thank us—"

"That's not how every cat is," both Sparrow and Shade huffed in unison. Shade continued, adding,

"Life isn't some fantastical tale you hear from your mother and father about how everything turns out okay in the end. That's just not how it is. Not every cat is the same; nor are they perfect. I honestly thought you'd understand that by now."

Hickory scored her claws heavily on the stony floor of the crumbling den. "What do you expect from me? I haven't lived my whole life out here. It was. . . different where I came from."

Shade curled her lip. "Oh, so _seven_ moons isn't enough for you to figure out how to adjust! What does it matter if it 'was different' where you came from? You're _here_ now! And this is so much more unforgiving than 'where you came from.'"

While the two continued to argue, Sparrow, Rainpaw noticed, had left. Moving away from the bickering she-cats, he ducked outside into the cold wind to sit beside him.

Sparrow cleared his throat, head spun to gaze at the gray snow capped peaks. "I'm sure you want to go search for her. Am I correct?" Rainpaw quickly replied that he did. Sparrow smiled and continued. "She was headed for the mountains, like we told you, but when she left this place—as you will shortly—she did not look in fit enough a condition to make that long of a journey. You'll probably find her in a couple of sunrises if you travel quick. My guess is she stopped someplace and never bothered to continue on." Sparrow bent to groom his tail, afterwards looking back to Rainpaw. "Go, now. You're time here has expired. Please, before I make you, leave."

Rainpaw nodded, dipping his head to Sparrow, and, rising steadily, started off after thanking the older tom. Gradually, his shoulders lifted as he walked in the direction the distant ridge. He felt free of something that had kept him in darkness. He had a purpose now. He would find her and see what she knew. Perhaps she knew the meaning behind the words that still lingered faintly like smoke in his dreams. _When the silence has broken and shattered, a storm of fire will return to lash out at the sky._ Now, after his time with those three cats, he was sure that 'a sparrow' had guided him. But would that only leave more questions to be left unanswered?

As he trekked, his mind wandered, turning and twisting down new paths of thought and consideration. He knew he that he knew them as much as he knew the stranger he was searching for, but he kept on his course with the hope that everything would become clearer once he heard what she, hopefully, would tell him. Would she tell him anything? And if she did, would it even relate to why he was doing this? Should he even trust her at all?

 _Your purpose lies with her, Rainpaw. Trust her, or you will never know._

Feathertail's soft murmur whisked about his ears, untimely, unneeded, unwanted. He scowled.

"Why should I even trust you anymore!" he hissed. "You've given me nothing but more confusion."

 _Not everything you hear will make sense right now, but it will, in time._

"'In time?' Everything always has to be so vague with you StarClan cats. Sparrow was right, you are delusional! I'm done listening to you!"

 _As you wish. But promise me that you will do one last thing for me._

"Fine . . ." He gritted his teeth. "What do you want me to do?"

 _Listen to her._

* * *

Rainpaw was sure that he smelled something. But then, what was to say that he wasn't going paranoid from lack of sleep?

Shadows shrouded his eyes; so, like a blind cat, he relied on his nose for guidance. The scent, only a faint trace when he first found it, now grew stronger. It was unfamiliar to him, but he believed he knew it from somewhere. The place was escaping him.

His stomach growled, and, bristling, he crouched low to the ground and peered through the undergrowth.

He spotted a shadow move at the edge of his vision. Then another. Then another. He hissed at them all, the snarling faces of his Clanmates fresh in his mind. He snapped. Rainpaw snarled. "Get away from me! I've done nothing wrong! Let me alone!" The forms only moved closer when he continued to threaten them. No moon shone overhead, but he could see the glint of their teeth in the pitch darkness. They lunged for him, snarling and hissing and clawing at his body, and every movement flashed like lightning across his vision. He tried to fight back, not with the words that had so miserably failed him, but force instead. Every blow passed like it had not happened, every cut of his claws reforming as though they cut through water.

Each leapt for him one final time, their crushing jaws aiming for his throat. Like the cave from his kithood, they collapsed upon him. Stars invaded his vision, and he too, collapsed.

There was nothing there. . .

Dawn came again by the time he woke, but he was not alone.


	18. Poisoned

**Chapter 17: Poisoned**

* * *

"You need to wake up, Rain. We have a lot to discuss."

Rain bristled, still shrouded in sleep's embrace. He could hear the voice, but he kept from responding. The scent of the cat—at least he assumed it was a cat—or was he dreaming?—was peculiar, tinged with bits of leaf-scent and water. The voice which spoke to him, too, he felt, had some sort of strange gruffness to it which held strength, but did not sound aggressive in any way. In the least, he could say he was almost comforted to hear it. He didn't know what it meant, and for a moment he wanted to ignore what the voice all together. But when it spoke again, that was when he woke up.

"Rain, wake up. It's me, your mother."

Rainpaw spun to face the voice, and was disgusted by what he saw. The cat in front of him was a ragged mess. Her fur was ruffled and a dirty white color that told him she forgone grooming it for a long time. Her eyes, a dark blue like his own, were dull and heavy. Was she grieving? He looked her over, puzzled and curious. He saw that her shoulders were low as she sat there, her body hunched over. In all, she looked incredibly sad. He could not bring himself to even think that this disheveled mess of a cat was what she claimed. He retreated to the idea that Foxear had never told him anything, just to appease his conscience and dismiss himself from bringing the thought to his mind. "Don't think you can play these games with me, _rogue_. You are not my mother!" His lips curled up into a snarl. "How do you even know my name?'

The rogue's face remained unchanged, in contrast with his anger. She sat with her tail over her paws, silent for a long few moments, just watching him before she spoke. "I _am_ your mother, Rain. You were much too young to remember me, a little less than a quarter-moon old when I was forced to give you to a pair of cats on a stretch of moorland. Moss and Beetle I think their names were. It's been so long I can hardly even remember when."

 _Is she talking about Mosswhisker and Beetle back in WindClan? Sh-She can't be. . . No, that's impossible!_

Rainpaw arched his back, "You're lying. None of that is true!"

"But you see, Rain, I'm not lying to you. All of that is true. They took you from me. And I have missed you ever since. When you were growing up, did you ever notice how different you were from the cats around you? Did you ever realize how different you probably looked from the cats you called your 'parents?'" The unnamed rogue stood and walked closer to Rain, staring him straight in the eye. "Well?"

 _She's right about that. I asked Antfoot and Foxear about my appearance once when I was a kit, I remember now! They told me it was the way StarClan wanted me to be! They said it made me unique, and that I should be happy about that. And I believed every word of it! Is StarClan just another lie I was manipulated into believing with all my heart like a oblivious rabbit? What should I even believe anymore? Is everything just a lie?_ "Yes. I have."

The rogue's whiskers twitched, and her eyes searched his. "And how did that make you feel?"

"Excluded. All I wanted was to feel accepted, and no cat there ever truly did."

The she-cat smirked, and a moment later it vanished. "And doesn't that make you furious now, to think about how they excluded you? belittled you? mistreated you?"

Rainpaw found himself nodding, a deep molten anger pushing into his thoughts, turning them black. "I want to make them pay for what they did to me for so many moons of my life!"

The white-furred rogue smiled at him, and her eyes glinted for a heartbeat. "They are not the ones you should turn your fury on, dear. There is another. . . more deserving."

"Who!" Rain demanded, trembling with rage at his thoughts of revenge.

"Feathertail did not tell you? Pity."

Rain drew back a step. "You know of Feathertail!"

"Of course, she walks many skies."

Rain leaned forward, watching the nameless rogue. "Why would she come to me specifically? I'm nobody important."

The rogue laughed lightly, "Yes you are, Rain. Yes you are. You are going to help me with something. That's why I pleaded for my ancestors to get her to talk with you . . I am the Teller of Pointed Stones for the Tribe of Rushing Water. And as I said, you are going to help me."

Rainpaw sighed, sitting down to listen. "Fine. What do you need my help with?"

Stoneteller purred, satisfied, her mouth turned to a wry smile. "I need you to. . . end a life for me."

Rainpaw darted to his paws, growling at her with his head low. "Are you mad! Why would you even think I would agree to that!"

"I am not asking you to do it without reason."

He hissed at her and bared his teeth. "What harebrained reason could you even have to want to _kill_ a cat? That's against everything you're meant to do as the leader of your Tribe; if you even are, that is. You're supposed to protect and care for the cats around you, not plot their murders— You are mad, totally mad!"

"I have only one reason: exile. Your father—I am telling the truth—had you with me. He kept it hidden from everyone around us, knowing full well it was against the vow I made when I became the Teller of Pointed Stones. My Tribe was supposed to be put above all else, but a large part of me loved him, so, naturally, I ignored that vow. He kept it from me, all until the morning two days before you were born, when he told everyone about what I had done. Then there was no secret to be kept anymore. _He betrayed the promise he made!_ Everyone thought that I had betrayed my post, and the Tribe of Endless Hunting. I was ruined; and he just watched on, emotionless. The very next day, I was exiled from the Tribe. They sent me away, down the mountain side to give birth to you _alone_ , without help.

Then one day I found a forest, and the moorland that bordered it. I was overjoyed. I actually believed we would be safe. Then you were taken from me, and I was thrown right back there again with him. If you wish your anger on any cat, wish it on your father. Make him feel the same pain we felt! Make him pay for the life you've lived away from me!"

"You're asking me to murder him just because you were sent away?"

"He got us both exiled! Please, dear, make this right. Don't allow him to continue to haunt me. Sometimes, something as wrong as murder can be forgiven, if it is done for the right reasons. Don't you want to live the rest of your life free of suffering, Rain?"

Rainpaw couldn't help but agree with her and nod, feeling his anger returning. "I-I do."

"Then do what's right and help me."

Rainpaw watched this cat who claimed to be his mother, finding himself agreeing with her more and more as he continued to think on what she said. But there was still one more thing he need to know. "I have a question for you, 'Stoneteller.'"

The she-cat's ears flicked once and she nodded. "What would that be, Rain?"

"What was your name before you became the Teller of Pointed Stones?"

"My name? Is that really all you want to know about me?" Rainpaw nodded. "Very well. . . My name was Song."

 _Once you hear the snow's song, you will know why. . .  
_

Rainpaw paused and looked the she-cat over with a new interest, slowly reaching the point where everything made sense. "I will help you," he told her shakily.

"Good." Song turned and walked from him. "Come. I have a lot I need to tell you."

She led him to a small clearing, ringed by tall grasses and weeds. Here and there, dandelions dotted the ground, and several thorn bushes surrounded the space. She sat and waited for him to settle before speaking. "You need to know about your father, what he looks like, how he acts, who he is, else you are of no use whatsoever. Your father, to put it simply, was incredibly arrogant. Throughout much of the time that I was seeing him,"—her voice rose—"he repeatedly went against my decisions. Every time I would suggest that we do something, he would refuse."

Rainpaw tilted his head, "Why didn't you just end your relationship with him then?"

Song sighed, "I was too naïve, to taken with him to think to do that. He acted pleasant around others, but when he,was with me, he would always get aggressive. I know that I was the leader, but to tell you the truth, I was scared of him. Too scared to fight back. . ." A tremor shook her, but he was too caught up listening to notice. "You want to know something about authority, Rain. When you have it, you're always thinking in the back of your mind that someone is going to take it away from you. That's how I felt around him, absolutely scared. I was paranoid, I'm sure. I watched every cat as though they were plotting my death. Then I found that I was pregnant, and that only terrified me more. What would the Tribe say? What would _he_ say? I shut myself in my den after that; I didn't want anyone to know.

"Of course he had to find out—it was obvious what had happened by then. And, of course he told every single one of them. The rest of the day they all sat around debating what to do with me and my betrayal. That evening—Oh, how I want to kill him now!—that evening, he made the suggestion that they should draw stones. It was the fairest method he could think of, I heard him say. And then he cast his stone against me! My own mate voted for me to be exiled! Do you have any idea how that feels, to be neglected by the ones who love you?'

Rainpaw's tail lashed. _They've probably forgotten about me already, too._

"I want you to make your father know that same pain. Make all those moons of hurt and hardship we've experienced felt at the tips of your claws."

"Who am I looking for?' Rainpaw asked, snarling.

"Your father is a golden-furred tom with with green eyes like a forest in the Time of Freed Water. He looks nothing like us two, though. He has short fur and is very lithe. When I was still there, he was a prey-hunter. Hopefully, he's not that hard to find."

Rainpaw nodded, flexing his claws. "Thank you for telling me this, Song."

Song smiled and flicked her tail dismissively.

"You have probably traveled far to get here. You should come with me and get some rest before you head out." All Rainpaw thought to do was nod and follow after her when she walked past a cluster of grasses and dandelions back into the trees, not doubt nor question, just follow. That was all his clouded mind could manage. And he let it control his actions.

His mind trekked to other thoughts, bored of focusing on nothing but Song, who led Rainpaw onward. He thought about Feathertail. She stopped speaking with him, for a long while now, and his pelt itched while he wondered if she ever would again. Or if she even wanted to anymore. The starry cat led him this far. Why would she stop so suddenly? Was he supposed to find his own way now? At least he could say his journey now had purpose thanks to Song. However ruining that purpose, that reason, was, Rainpaw still believed that he should help her. There was a nagging shred of sympathy for her that told him it was right for him to believe her and do what she wanted him to do.

Song stopped up ahead, standing beside a large mound in the earth that had a tunnel dug into it, an abandoned badger den. Too wrapped up in thought, Rainpaw stumbled. His side hit the ground with a heavy thump, and he soon regained his footing, trying to shake it off. He walked over to and sniffed at the mound, smelling nothing but decaying leaves and its revolting mustiness. He wrinkled his nose. "Is this where you're staying?"

The she-cat huffed, blinking at him in bewilderment. "No. I have someplace else I am staying. This is only a temporary place for you to stay until you set out tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?—"

"You're not questioning me, are you? what I've asked you to do?" The dirty white cat narrowed her eyes.

Rainpaw blinked at Song, mouth agape. He stammered out a _no_.

"Good." Song smiled and left him then, disappearing into the brush, lost from his sight among the trees. He turned to the abandoned den, hesitant to enter even as he moved towards it. Why had Song shown him this place instead of taking him to where she had been? Did she think that little of him already? His mind was prickled with tiny thorns of doubt more now than before. If she cared for him—like a mother should—why would she do so little to welcome him? Even Foxear, for all she had kept from him, had done more than this. Still, it was a place to rest. And he was thankful. Crouching to get inside, he settled on a pile of decaying, damp leaves and closed his eyes hoping dreams would find him.

None came to him by the time dawn broke out into the world.

Stiff and weary from sleep, Rainpaw dragged his body outside. He yawned, blinking and looking around for Song. He wanted to leave and start off towards the mountains. He felt his anger returning, heavier and stronger the more he thought about what Song asked him to do, his mind more willing to do it.

He wanted to find his father.

He wanted to make things right. . .

After several minutes, the tom saw Song appear to him again, carrying a wood pigeon. She set it down at his paws, then sat several tail-lengths away with her tail around herself. "It's all yours, Rain. I'm sorry it wasn't much, but it's all I could catch."

Rainpaw shook his head, grateful to her either way. After a few minutes, and half the bird devoured, the tom pushed the meal away and sat up. "Thank you for the pigeon," he said with a soft smile.

"It's not a problem, really."

Nodding, Rainpaw rose and shook out his pelt. "I should get started now, then." He tilted his head back, trying to spot the distant peaks. He started off.

"Rain, please remember to do as I asked."

When he had fully disappeared, Song's eyes brightened in a brief moment of clarity before submerging again in darkness, and the she-cat walked off with a scowl.


	19. Blood

**Chapter Eighteen: Blood**

* * *

He didn't know how far he traveled, or for how long. Perhaps, at this point, he didn't care anymore. He just knew that he was going somewhere, to find him. The cliffs and peaks towered above him. Everything he saw made him feel small now, like an ant. But he had been alone, completely alone, for a long time since he left Song behind. He'd been able to think, to plan what he would do when he found her Tribe, when he found his father. The sparse cover of plants and bushes leaned toward the stony ground, forced down by a heavy wind. Rainpaw's ears flattened along with them. He needed cover. He didn't want stay out much longer.

 _Funny. I used to love the wind._

Glancing across the jagged landscape, he searched feverishly for any place that could save him. A dark cave, shrouded by a tumbling waterfall, captured his focus and he raced for it, ducking inside and pausing to let himself calm down. For a minute, his eyes saw nothing but shadows and darkness before he became used to the dim light and could see. But he saw nothing but emptiness. There was no life, no laughter or joy left in the still cave. "Hello?" His echo answered him. Still curious, he moved farther in, still calling out the single question.

He was met with no real response, until a shadow caught his eye. "Hey!" Rainpaw called, trying to get it's attention, hoping it wasn't something he would not want to see. A cat's low growl responded to him this time, and a thin brown tom made himself known, his posture heavily guarded as he made for Rainpaw. He stopped, lashing his tail, fur spiked.

"Who are you?" he demanded. "Y'know what? I don't really care who you are, just get off Tribe land. Now."

Rainpaw shifted back a few steps. "My name is . . ." What had name had he been using? Rain? Just Rain? . . . That will have to do. ". . . Rain."'

"Well, Rain, you seem a little lost, don't you think?" The thin tom's lips curled, his expression indicating he clearly did not want to help him. "How about you get a move on before I have to chase you off."

"Please, I'm only here because of Song. Would you mind if I . . ."

The tom raised his tail for silence, then turned and disappeared down what Rainpaw guessed was a tunnel. A slew of jumbling voices came back to him.

"What is this about, Elm?" A deep voice drifted out into the cavern. There was silence for a long moment before Elm answered the question with a sheepish I don't know. The deeper-voiced cat grumbled unintelligibly, emerging out into the larger cavern and into the weak light of the sun.

"He said he came only because of Song, S—"

"You already told me that . . . Snow,"—he turned to a rather large, white tomcat—"please make sure Elm is given time to calm down." Two young she-cats who seemed cling to the tom's side, possibly his daughters, backed away to let him pass. The pair disappeared through the tunnel a heartbeat later. It was then that Rainpaw could see just how many there were living here. More than a dozen pairs of eyes stared blankly at him, stopping their advance just as soon as they emerged from the shadows, as though they saw a spirit before them. A chorus of questions and confused looks took flight.

"Is that Song's kit?"

"How in all the world is he here?"

"I thought she'd . . ."

"What should we do about this, Stoneteller? let him stay, or have him leave?"

A large, dark brown tomcat silenced their questions, moving past the group until he stood a fox-length from his visitor. He stood in silence for several heartbeats, then turned back to the group. "What do you want for him? He looks a lot like I would expect of your and Song's kit." A moment passed and the tom nodded, turning his focus back to Rainpaw. "As he wishes, welcome to the Tribe of Rushing Water. You have my permission to stay as long as you think you will need. . . . Maybe you could do some catching up."

* * *

He was staring into the face of a ghost, the cat Song told him about, the father he never knew.

All he wanted was to see the tom pay for the live he had to live.

But not yet.

He needed to find a way.

They had only been able to speak for a few brief moments until now, introduced earlier by two cats named Flower and Mist.

Flower, a sweet golden tabby queen, had been the first to come up to him after the Tribe's new Stoneteller dismissed everyone. He spent a lot of time simply asking her questions about how everything worked in the Tribe; its structure and so on. He enjoyed talking with her; and her two kits, Leaf and Shadow, were always around her and wanting to ask him questions. He answered them when he could find an answer to give, but his focus remained on what Flower was telling him.

Mist, a silver-furred she-cat, had brought Rainpaw's father over after some time and introduced herself. But the tom, for all of the minute he spent there before being called away, never introduced himself.

And yet, it didn't feel like home at all, even after he had been welcomed so openly.

 _I want him gone. Who is this? I want him gone._

Rain smiled blankly, tucking his paws beneath him. The golden-furred cat across from him disturbed their silence. "I've missed you so much. I thought for the longest time you were dead after she le—."

"Well, I'm here, aren't I . . ."

The tom nodded, stone-faced. "My name is Sky, Rain. Sorry that I hadn't introduced myself to you earlier,"—he chuckled—"A lot of things happened, and I never got the time. . . Perhaps you'd like to go hunting while there's still light? I would love to show you around the territory and help you get used to life here."

"I would like that," Rainpaw replied, glancing at the maze of tunnels off to his lef out of the corner of his eyes.

"Feel like going out now?" Rainpaw's company stood and waited, patient and expectant, for him to stand as well. Grunting, Rain stood and shook out his fur, following Sky out past the waterfall and onto the rocky grassland of the Tribe's territory.

As they searched, Rainpaw began to fret; to worry; to doubt. He needed more information, proof that he had done all those things he said. Proof that he wanted her gone, like she said.

When the golden-furred cat stopped near a large tumble of rocks on the sparse hillside, Rainpaw followed and cleared his throat as he came up alongside him. "What was Song like when you still saw her?"

The tom paused, his brow furrowed. "She was different—a lot different; happier—before it happened."

Before you had me and forced her to leave, you mean?

"She was a better leader than anyone could have asked for. Then . . ."

Rainpaw curled his lip. "Then what? You forced her to leave because it was against her duty as a healer?"

The golden-furred cat, Sky, took a step back. "Forced her? What are you talking about Rain? No one forced her to leave. Not long after you were born she became incredibly sick, delusional. An—"

Rainpaw's eyes narrowed into thin snake-like slits. "How dare you speak about her like that! I met her long before I came here, and she was not sick!"

Sky lowered himself, bushing out his fur, muscles tense. "I am only telling you the truth! She was not sick physically Rain, not as far as anyone here could tell. There was something wrong with her. She acted like everyone around her was an enemy looking to harm you. She was paranoid. She never wanted to speak with anyone, not even me. Do you even know how horrible that feels: to have someone you care about shut you out? Do you you even know how it feels to have them one day be so close to you and the next be so distant it was like they ran a sky-length that night? No one forced her to leave. Song left with you of her own free will. And no one stopped her because there was no one else but her in the Tribe at the time to care for you."

"You let her take me away. You made it so she could give me over to parents who never were. You made it so I had to live a life of nothing but emptiness and confusion." Rain's tail lashed as he stepped closer to Sky, unsheathing his claws. "You did this to me!" he yowled.

Unable to contain his fury, Rainpaw spun and ran back to the sheltering embrace of the cave, ducking into the side tunnel he had been shown not too long ago. An array of shocked and baffled faces watched him bury himself in the nest he'd been given.

Mist was the first to speak. Her mew was gentle and quiet, akin to a soft breeze. "What's wrong? I thought I heard mention of you going hunting not too long ago. Did you catch anything?"

"No, I did not."

"You could always try again. The mountains won't crumble just because you came back empty-pawed." The face of the dark tom that sat smiling at him was amber-eyed and warm. But Rainpaw didn't care. He wanted to be left alone.

The young tomcat tapped his claws lightly on the stone floor. "Be quiet, all right? I don't care a whisker about what you have to say."

"Well maybe you should, cloud-brain," came a rough growl from a nest opposite the silver she-cat's.

"Water, stop it!" pleaded the amber-eyed tom.

"You're defending him now, Air? You were trying to be nice to him."

"Both of you stop. You're acting like kits," a russet she-cat snapped.

Water rose from his nest and walked over to Rainpaw, growling. "Not now Pine, please."

Pine stood, watching Water and lashing her tail.

"What is it that has you in a bad mood?" Water demanded.

"I don't want to talk about it. Especially not with you."

Water hissed at him, raising paw to strike him. He stopped abruptly when Air pleaded for him to sit back down and let Rainpaw alone.

A tense silence fell over them all.

* * *

He couldn't sleep.

Maybe it was nerves?

Fear?

Guilt?

He felt like truly leaving them but something pulled him outside, yet forced him to remain. Nothing stirred in the darkness of the cave, the moon the only light present to guide his paws. A shadow cut through the light.

"Hello?" Rainpaw whispered in the direction of the waterfall. The shadow—no, the cat—turned his way, waving him over.

"Couldn't sleep?"

Rainpaw shook his head and the cat purred. "Neither could I. I was up thinking about earlier today. If it's anything at all to you, I want to tell you how sorry I am for all the things you say I did to you. I never wanted at all to hurt you."

The moon's light caught in front of them, a bright glint on the floor of the cave flashed.

"I'm sorry too . . ."


	20. Light

**This is it.**

* * *

 **Chapter Nineteen: Light**

* * *

"Sorry for what? You haven't done anything wrong." The golden-furred tomcat turned to face his son, his brow furrowed. "Even if you did, I would never love you any less."

Rainpaw frowned, hunching his body. "But haven't I? Everyone does something they regret at least once in their lives."

The moon that brought light to his world disappeared, drifted behind the clouds, and cast them in muted darkness. Nothing but the dull light of their eyes remained as the two stared.

"Of course, Rain. But why are you saying these things like _there is_ something you will regret."

A soft laugh lifted to the clouds with the life of a bird at the rise of the sun. "It's not that I won't regret something in the near future right now. It's what I regret doing in the past—"

The sky seemed to shake, to tremble almost, while thunder boomed far off somewhere in the distance. "What do you regret?"

"Listening.

I regret listening to my dreams; I regret listening to the snow's song— _I will die, inside and out, if I do this, won't I?_ —I regret trying to find my own place in this world when I should have stayed put; I regret not allowing myself to be happy with the life I had; I regret every moment that I shut others out; I regret the things I will do.

But I do not regret where I will go when the winds have died down."

A sliver of moonlight escaped the clouds' veil, bringing again a white glint in the darkness, leaping through the shadows and towards the golden light of a new dawn. Nothing, and everything, occurred within a heartbeat. A whirling ball of claws, fur, and fangs tumbled at the edge of the face. Death waited below, calling. Growls and snarls were pitched into the chill air.

"Stop! What are are you doing!"

"Only what I have to—"

"Please, don't do this; you aren't like this!"

"How would you know what I am like? We never met before today . . . I cannot allow _this_ to continue. I won't. I can't . . . I am very sorry about this."

Brilliant light returned to the world just as a life had left it.

 _He_ fled and hid.

* * *

There was light again, and the tom felt warm. He was not broken or destroyed: his body on the mountainside.

Rising, renewed, rejuvenated, the tomcat could not help but smile at the world before him that overflowed with life.

Grasses rattled in front of him, and he tensed. A mouse stopped, looked at him, then scampered on. _It's probably scared of me, that's all._ Was _it_ really, though?

He worked his way around the boundless territory.

Everywhere he looked lay a new discovery, another new thing to get used to or learn about. There truly was no end.

"You seem a little lost, huh? Would you like if I show you around?" a smiling cat asked, walking his way.

He turned, surprised to see such an immediate, welcoming offer of help. He dipped his head. "That would be appreciated, thank you."

For a long time they walked with no direction. The cat was more than happy to explain the things he saw around him, no matter how trivial.

Yet after some time, they stopped. While he sat beside the colossal-looking cat, a thought emerged.

"Who are you?'

The cat's eyes shut for a moment, a faint smile etched in its expression. "After all that, after all the questions you've asked me, you decide to ask _that one_ _again_?" He nodded, dumbly grinning. "I believe you already know me, little one."

"I do?"

The cat laughed. "Yes. From before."

"'Before?'"

"Don't worry about that now, dear. Wait to see where the sunlight shines."

He nodded, although somewhat confused; he had all the time in the world to wait.

He sat there beside the large cat, distracted by his thoughts.

 _I wanted to be happy. All my life that was the only thing I ever wanted._

 _I guess I was happiest when I knew that there was more to life than happiness._

Then he was called away . . .


	21. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

* * *

 _I never really gave much thought to what my life would be like if I hadn't gone to look for Tara that night. Would I still be living with Everest? or would I have done the exact same thing, just_ differently. _I can't say for sure. Maybe I would have, maybe not. Who would I be if things hadn't been that way though? Probably not the same cat I am now. For all the independence I thought I had while I was living back there with my family and housefolk, I was not that independent at all. I sure as the sunrise tried to be, but I still depended on so many others; and I never gave a moment's thought to any of them._

 _If I never followed Everest, I would not have gone to Leo; without Leo I would not have gone looking for Tara; without Tara, I would not have stayed with Sparrow; and without Sparrow, I never would have found a place to call_ home _._

 _Where would that leave me then? sitting on that rickety fence, looking out over the hillside, so close to the freedom I was looking for but never taking that leap down?_

 _Probably._

 _And if I hadn't done any of that, I wouldn't have found these two; I wouldn't have loved this_ one. _Everything I did back then to help him four moons ago was worth it. Every single second. I made a difference for someone. Even if it_ was _just a raindrop in a river, I'm happy that I did it.  
_

"Lost in thought again, Hickory?" A scarred muzzle poked into the stone den, and the tomcat made his way to her with his lips pulled up to reveal a grin. "You've been like that since yesterday. What've you been thinking about?"

"Memories. Happy ones. About you; Shade; Rain. Lots of things."

Sparrow's grin disappeared. "Rain? Why him?"

"Because I made a difference for him, just like you did. And that made my role in his life far more meaningful." Sparrow nuzzled the gray she-cat and sat beside her, watching the two-moon-old kit tracking and pouncing on her tail. Regret was a friend to him when he thought about the past, but here with this kit—their _future_ , it was no where to be found.

The kit shared their features equally: a mix between their brown and gray fur spattered his own, and he was almost fluffy—a rain cloud, Hickory had said. A small amused grin conquered the father's features. _Their_ little rain cloud. The kit's eyes were a strange blue, set apart from the rest of the its features like a tree on a plain.

But they didn't care about that, not even after his eyes had stayed that way. They loved him no matter how he looked, happy just that they could love him.

Hickory watched as their kit, now bored with "hunting" his mother's tail, ran to Shade, bouncing on his paws and demanding to be told a story of some sort.

"Do you think he'll ever grow out of all this energy, dear? Soon, I'm going to have a hard time keeping up with him."

Sparrow purred, pressing his nose to Hickory's forehead. "At this rate, I'm not so sure. But that's a good thing at his age: let's you know they're healthy."

Hickory stopped watching the kit for a heartbeat to glance up at his father. "Do you ever wonder what happened to them? Rain and Song, I mean. About where they is, or how they're doing? I have. And all I hope is that he found what he was looking for. I didn't find what I was looking for, but found something just as meaningful to me."

"What would that be, dear?"

"Happiness . . . Do you think that's what he was searching for? happiness?"

The fluffy brown tom shrugged, his fur prickly pine needles. "Maybe. I can't say for certain, but maybe."

Soon their kit wandered back to his mother, gorged on stories and wonder, tired and looking for sleep. "Tired, huh, Storm?" The blue-eyed kitten nodded his head drowsily, then curled up with his mother and fell asleep.

But he couldn't stay, not that long into the night. This night kept him awake, while his family slept around him. He'd only slept a few hours but seethed with restless energy. He wanted to explore, but knew they wouldn't allow him.

He went anyway, pulled onward by the light of the moon and the howling of the wind. He sat outside watching the sky. And for a moment, he wondered if there was a world out there bigger than this stretch of moor; bigger than the stone den he shared with his parents and Shade; bigger than everything he had ever known.

 _Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever see that strange little sparrow again . . ._

* * *

 **Well, that's it for _Howling Winds. T_ his story was incredibly fun to write and I really want to thank every single person that went along on this adventure with me. It's not going to be the end of my time writing on here, though. You'll be seeing more in the future.  
**

 **There's going to be a poll on my profile until next Friday, which is going to have a naming question for a character in my next story.**

 **Thank you and see you around everyone,**

 **Tranquil Rain**


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